Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 4: Meeting the Expectations of Family and Friends
• Part 2 of 4: Plan your wedding
• Part 3 of 4: Follow the plan
• Part 4 of 4: Enjoy the Party
• Tips

If a small wedding with your loved ones is exactly what you and your groom want, then you should arrange just such a modest but memorable celebration. A wedding traditionally can be associated with a grand celebration, unexpected expenses and a huge list of guests, but this should be the personal decision of the couple - to have a big celebration or a small wedding with loved ones. With the right planning and execution, you can have exactly the small wedding you've dreamed of.

Steps

Part 1 of 4: Meeting the Expectations of Family and Friends

1. 1 Be prepared to deal with resentment. It will be difficult to have a small wedding without hurting anyone's feelings. Take the bull by the horns and explain to potential offended guests that you love them and appreciate their support, but you won't be able to accommodate everyone.
   • Express your sympathy for the offended family members. Always be compassionate and apologize if needed.Explain to them that you did not want to offend anyone, and make it clear that you appreciate their desire to be with you on such a special day for you.
   • Dispel any hopes of getting invited right from the start by making comments like "we have chosen such a small place." This will help you deal with expectations even before any potentially uncomfortable confrontation.
2. 2 Compromise with your mom. Your mom's dream wedding might include a guest list three times yours and an expensive menu. Don't let your guest list crawl to unprecedented proportions by making compromises that are beneficial to you. For example, tell your mom that you can accommodate your grandmother's daughter-in-law, but you won't send out invitations to your dentist's entire family.
   • Take the blame. If your mom thinks your wedding, with her short guest list, will be the main topic of discussion this century, let her put the blame on you. For example, she might tell her friends that you are a force to be reckoned with and that your inappropriate wedding plans are completely beyond her control. If she is confused by a small number of guests, this will help calm her outrage.
   • Let your mom feel busy and important. If you don't care what boutonnieres the best men will have, let her take on this project. Give her almost complete control over the project, but still tell her how valuable you think it is for her to take on such responsibility. Nobody wants to do useless work.
3. 3 Know your plan and stick to it. When it comes to a wedding, family and friends may act like their opinion is more important than yours. Never forget that it is not. You and your future husband are the only people who make decisions about the upcoming wedding. Tantrums can be avoided by carefully discussing intentions at the very beginning of planning.
   • Consider hiring a wedding planner. The wedding planner may seem like an additional and unnecessary burden on the budget, but he will have connections with establishments, suppliers and florists. In addition, it can become a wedding lifeline and help cope with quarrelsome relatives or parents. Wedding planners are specialists in dispelling stressful situations in stressful situations.
   • Warn suppliers if you think family members might be acting behind your back. This will prevent anyone from making unexpected changes to the menu, song list or photo session.

Part 2 of 4: Plan your wedding

1. 1 Make a wedding budget. Start with the amount of free money you have and plan how much you can save to help you determine what kind of wedding you want to have. Your budget is a key factor in deciding how many guests you will have at your wedding. If your budget and the wedding you want don't match, you can set a date later and raise more money. Once you've put together your initial budget, don't be afraid to revisit the numbers. The budget should be flexible and fit for both partners.
   • Use the list of wedding services to take into account any things you might have missed, such as transporting guests and gifts for bridesmaids.
   • Ask for help from loved ones. Your parents or family members may want to contribute to your wedding budget, but it's worth communicating your expectations before accepting financial assistance. Be careful, as accepting money may seem like a condition to relatives that they are allowed to make decisions related to the wedding, such as increasing the guest list. It is imperative that you discuss your wedding wishes before accepting financial assistance to make sure everyone understands each other correctly.
   • Make a list of the must-haves for you. Prioritize it.This list will help you stay on track and budget. If wedding budgets are just stressful for you, remember that they are designed specifically to help you stick to the essentials and not regret making any decisions later.
2. 2 Make a guest list. Use a tiered system to determine their number. First, create the first row of must-have people for your wedding. Close family members should be on the front row guest list. Then create a second row of people you would like to invite. The second row should include friends and close colleagues. The third and last row is a list of guests you should invite, but this is not required. For example, distant relatives and family friends. Use the first row as a starting point for your guest list and build up the list sequentially. You'd better keep these lists a secret so as not to hurt anyone's feelings.
   • Choose witnesses for the bride and groom. They will be very important figures on your special day, and they should fit into the guest list. Don't feel obligated to choose only from the first row of guests, rather choose based on the person's friendship and character. If your best friend is quiet and shy, she might be better off being a second bridesmaid, and her charming and outgoing cousin may be more suited to the role of a witness.
   • If your guest list is getting out of hand, consider not inviting children under 12. This can be especially useful if you want to host a stylish, elegant event that is not suitable for children. If you don't invite children, many relatives from other cities may not want to go to the wedding, and if you really want to see them at your wedding, hire animators for children who would look after all the children at once.
3. 3 Choose a date and place. When choosing a location for your ceremony and reception, consider travel times and the discrepancy between the two locations. Feel free to visit the places you like. If you are not sure where you would like to hold the ceremony, in a garden, in a church or in a registry office, check out all three places. Visits are free and can give you a fresh perspective on your options.
   • Before signing an agreement for a venue, determine if it will be suitable for your guest list. A restaurant room for 100 people may not be the best place for a modest wedding with few guests. Also, ask about bar services, decoration, and grocery delivery to avoid any misunderstandings or conflicts closer to the wedding.

Part 3 of 4: Follow the plan

1. 1 Send out invitations. To avoid potential embarrassment, be sure to include only the names of prospective guests on invitations. For example, if you do not invite children, write only the names of the parents in the invitation, not “dear Ivanov family”. This makes it clear who is invited.
   • Include clear instructions on how to respond to the invitation. These instructions should include a response deadline and a response method. You can send ready-made envelopes with postage stamps along with the invitation, you can create an electronic reply card to save your time and the time of your guests.
   • Monitor the list of those who responded to the invitation. Even if you have asked your fiancé or witness to monitor the list, it is important for you to know how many guests you have. If somehow it turns out that you have more guests than expected, then it's best to talk to the intruders as early as possible.
2. 2 Delegate tasks to your witnesses and bridesmaids. To make the wedding stress-free, you need to delegate, delegate, and delegate again. The bridesmaids will be happy to help you, their job is not only to be beautiful.When you decide who will be your witness and bridesmaids, assign some tasks between them, depending on their interests. If you have a friend who knows how to cook a whole feast, take her out for a tasting session. Perhaps you have a friend who can turn the ribbon into a piece of art, ask her to help with the decoration.
   • Raise the ante by asking the groom, his witness, and friends for help. Instead of assuming they won't want to get into your business, ask them to make sure everything goes smoothly on this special day. Invite them to plan transportation for the day, help decorate the venue, or run small errands like picking up dry cleaners or flowers from a florist.
   • Boring jobs like sealing envelopes or cutting invitations can easily be turned into a fun party. Invite your girlfriends to your pizza and sort out a lot of envelopes together. You will see that with a team of helpers you can instantly deal with a huge list.
   SPECIALIST'S ADVICE

   

   Stefanie chu-leong

   
   
   Owner and General Event Manager of Stellify Events Stephanie Chu-Leon is the owner and General Event Manager of Stellify Events, an event management company operating in the San Francisco Bay Area and California Valley. He has over 15 years of experience and specializes in organizing large scale events and events. She received her BA in Marketing from California State University at San Francisco.

   Stefanie chu-leong
   Owner and General Event Manager, Stellify Events

   How do you deal with your bossy mom when planning your wedding? Give your mom a task that you know she will do well, such as helping with a cake or decorating a hall. Give her a task that she will take on with pride and joy, so that she feels involved, not left out.

   
   
3. 3 Listen to your stomach when choosing a menu. When it comes to choosing food and alcohol for your wedding, you won't regret choosing the option you like the most. Once you have finalized your guest list, decide which dishes you would like to see on the table. Be careful with your selection so as not to select foods that your guests might be sensitive to. For example, you might just love raw oysters, but your family members don't. Gather a team of people to sample food samples to make sure everyone has something for themselves.
   • Don't forget about your budget. Menu and booze can be one of the most expensive items on a wedding budget. It can easily swell to unexpected sizes, so it's best to keep a tight lid on it.
   • Find out the rules of your municipality and institution. Many places require a special permit for alcohol (for example, it may be forbidden to drink alcohol in a park or garden), you do not need unnecessary problems at the last minute. Institutions may also have strict rules, for example, it may be necessary that absolutely all meals and drinks be ordered in this particular restaurant. Know what to expect by knowing all the possible details for every point in your plan.

Part 4 of 4: Enjoy the Party

1. 1 Take time for your fiancé. Don't let wedding planning strain your relationship. Take time to relieve stress together. It might even be something as simple as walking the dog or going to the spa. Either way, your fiancé will be that way for a short time, so enjoy this period.
   • Take some time to pamper yourself. With all the worries of wedding planning, work, and the rest of your life, it's easy to lose track of time. If you notice that you are too busy to fit leisure and entertainment into your schedule, then be sure to write them down.Choose a day in advance and devote it to joint entertainment, forgetting about the wedding for this time.
2. 2 Encourage guests to participate in the process. A wedding speech is a time when you can relax and unwind, laugh or cry heartily and hopefully get unforgettable surprises. Feel free to ask guests to make their toasts. This is a surefire way to make your guest feel valued. But you should also not limit the participation of guests only to speech and toasts. Before this special day, ask someone close to prepare a special dance, sing a song, or do a slideshow.
   • Be careful not to pressure guests. While some guests may feel comfortable speaking in public, some may be uncomfortable. Forced speech is bad speech that will end up being awkward for you, the groom, and guests.
3. 3 Relax and unwind. When that day has arrived, breathe and relax. You've been planning this event for months, so you better try this expensive wine and these expensive dishes. Swing around among the guests and eat another piece of cake. Do not worry about anything, do not expose yourself to stress, because tomorrow everything will be over.
   • Don't worry about the little things. It may have started raining during the wedding photo shoot or the hot weather was taken out later than it should have been. Try not to get overwhelmed by issues that you cannot control. It can ruin your mood, and you don't want to go unhappy on your wedding day.
   • Replace your heels with more comfortable shoes. A smaller wedding means you have fewer guests to hang out with. Go out to them, talk to them and watch them enjoy the results of your hard work.
   • Choose a close guest who can handle any social awkwardness. If you think you might have an unfriendly cousin or a tactless aunt, assign a polite friend or family member to help deal with any awkwardness. If you choose in advance a person who knows how to calm down a possible conflict, you can relax and enjoy this holiday, and not worry about the fact that you have to play the role of a psychologist for your guests.

Tips

• Find websites that help with wedding planning. Using checklists is a surefire way to make sure you don't forget about anything, from choosing a photographer to a dedicated emergency kit on your wedding day.