Author:
Mark Sanchez
Date Of Creation:
1 January 2021
Update Date:
2 July 2024
Content
- Steps
- Method 1 of 3: Feel the spark
- Method 2 of 3: Communicate with each other
- Method 3 of 3: Build the Future
We all dream of finding the perfect guy who will love us forever, so to speak, a kindred spirit. Imagining life with our soul mate, as a rule, we picture in our minds a happy life in love and harmony until the end of our days. However, the key to a happy, lifelong relationship is more than just the trivial magic we imagine as children. It is a balance of mutual attraction, communication and long-term goals. With a pinch of natural attraction and plenty of commitment, your relationship can last your entire life.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Feel the spark
1 Think about the mutual attraction between you. If your significant other is next to you, then you are strongly attracted to each other. Are you looking forward to spending time together and miss each other when apart? Do you notice his gaze on you even when you're not trying to get attention? Do you catch yourself staring at him? Mutual attraction isn't just about physical attraction: - these are his actions: the way he behaves, how he behaves and how stupid he dances when he thinks that no one is seeing;
- this is his interaction with other people: the way he jokes with his friends, how he plays with your dog, how he buys ice cream in a cafe for his niece;
- it is the sound of his voice: his laughter and the little catchphrases he uses all the time.
2 Determine how well you understand each other. If your significant other is next to you, then you understand each other perfectly. You don't need to tell him that you are tired and want to stay at home in the evening - he sees it in your face. And you, too, can tell when he is tired. How well do you understand each other's body language and mood? This natural harmony makes you feel "made for each other." - Remember, understanding each other's moods and needs does not mean that you always feel the same way. It just means that there is deep empathy between you, and that you value each other's feelings highly.
3 Compare your sexual preferences. How interconnected are your desires? Do you have a similar libido? If your significant other is next to you, then you should be aware of each other's preferences, and you should enjoy performing them together. - Don't think that you will naturally converge sexually. Many people get nervous trying something new in the bedroom. Discuss your desires with each other. If you are not satisfied, let your partner know what you want from him. You will never know if you are truly compatible if you are not open to each other.
- Don't worry if sex is not a priority in your relationship (provided that it is not a priority for either of you and that both of you are satisfied after the intercourse).
Method 2 of 3: Communicate with each other
1 Assess how well you work together. Soul mates are a team. If your significant other is next to you, then you are covering each other's backs. You know that when times are tough, you will face them together. - Do you tell each other about your problems? Does he listen to you when you are upset and tell you that he is there in case you need help? Are you doing the same for him?
- If you need help, does he do his best to support you? A soul mate won't go out to friends while you are building a new bookshelf alone. He will be next to you with a hammer in his hands.
2 Determine your level of trust. If your significant other is next to you, it means that you are comfortable telling the person what you would not tell other people, and he does the same. You saw each other's vulnerabilities and lived the most difficult moments together. You don't worry that he will leave if he sees the real you, because he has already seen it and he likes it. And you also love him with all his flaws. - Are you comfortable telling him what you are ashamed or embarrassed of? Does he listen to you without judgment? Does it reveal itself to you? If you're soul mates, opening up should be easy because you know you love and support each other no matter what.
3 Compare your interests and hobbies. If your significant other is with you, you should have many similar interests. You don't have to love everyone the same, but you must have at least a few big interests in common. If you are a true bookworm, your soul mate will most likely enjoy reading as well. If you are a nature lover, your soulmate probably doesn't mind spending time outside the home, too. - Don't expect your spouse to love everything you do and vice versa. Both of you are unique individuals, and this is partly why you love each other. But you must share at least a few core interests and readily acknowledge others.
4 Pay attention to how you handle disagreements. Soul mates have a lot in common, support and listen to each other, but this does not mean that they have no disagreements. If your significant other is next to you, then you know that your love is stronger than any conflicts that arise between you.Both of you should feel comfortable facing challenges face to face because you know that it makes your relationship stronger and helps you become a better person. - Can you calmly tell him that he is wrong when you think so? Is it convenient for him to tell you about it? And when he criticizes you, you should listen because you know that, above all, he supports you and wants you to be the best version of yourself.
- How do you swear? Soul mates do not offend each other and do not hide resentment after a quarrel that occurred six months ago. When you argue with your significant other, the goal is to work on your problems and strengthen the relationship. The goal is not simply to win the argument.
5 Rate your admiration for each other. Does he find you an interesting and fascinating person? Does he find your jokes funny? Does he value your intelligence? If there is a significant other next to you, then the person believes in you and encourages you to believe in yourself, and you should do the same for him. - This does not mean that you do not notice each other's shortcomings. But you must be able to accept these shortcomings as part of what makes your partner who they are.
6 Ask yourself how well you know each other. If you are soul mates, you know not only the big things, but also the small details of everyday life, because you care about your partner and prioritize each other. Does he know which scrambled eggs you prefer and what shoe size you have? Do you know which tram he takes home from work or which section of the newspaper he likes to read first?
Method 3 of 3: Build the Future
1 Compare your goals for the future. Can you imagine a similar life in ten, twenty or thirty years? Your views do not have to be exactly the same, but if he imagines a quiet life in a house in the country, and you see yourself in a penthouse in Moscow City, there may be trouble ahead. Having similar goals helps you to be a team and work together to achieve what you want. - Do you have a similar view of the presence (absence) of children?
- Do you have a similar view of owning your own home? What home, where and when do you want to own, if you do?
- Do you have interrelated career goals? If you want to focus on your career and he wants to devote himself to raising children, have you discussed how to make both of these aspirations a reality?
2 Consider how you both manage your money. It's not very romantic, but financial problems are a common reason for breakups. If you find it safer to live with a large savings account and he wants to spend every penny he earns, chances are big problems await you. - Develop a financial plan that works for both of you and stick to it.
- Always discuss any money-related issues. Nobody likes financial surprises, not even soul mates.
3 Don't discount your values. Are your religious and political beliefs interconnected? It is not necessary to have full agreement on these issues, but there should not be absolutely opposite opinions. - Do you attach a similar meaning to religion? The closer your religion is to you, the more important it is that you have similar religious beliefs. If you are devout and he is an atheist, your couple may have problems. But if both of you don't attach much importance to religion, then it doesn't really matter if you are Jewish and he is Muslim.
- Do you have similar views on politics? If both of you are observing politics from the outside, then disagreements will not greatly damage your relationship. But if one of you is a staunch supporter of Putin and the other is Navalny, then you may have major disagreements. Of course, these questions can be resolved, but you will have to find a way to speak correctly about politics and listen to each other's opinions, even if you strongly disagree (and this can be a difficult task).
4 Assess your lifestyle. Are your lifestyles interconnected and do you enjoy spending time in a similar environment? If you're a stay-at-home and don't mind clutter, you might find it difficult to get along with a guy who is obsessed with cleanliness and hates sitting still. On the other hand, the union of two couch potatoes can turn into disaster (as well as two ultra-active careerists).Your lifestyle should complement each other, and both of you should nudge each other a little to try harder and get more rest. - Don't worry if your lifestyles aren't natural! You can work together to develop a routine that works for both of you.
