Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Become a Friend
• Part 2 of 3: Earn Trust
• Part 3 of 3: Talking About Your Feelings

Imagine that you have met a cute girl and are about to ask her out on a date. Suddenly, she casually mentions that she has a boyfriend. Your heart is falling. A lot of guys have gone through this situation and it's not easy. You need to respect other people's relationships. But this does not mean that you cannot be this girl's friend. You don't need to convince her to break up with her boyfriend, but maybe someday she will be alone again and you will have a chance!

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Become a Friend

1. 1 Find out about her interests. You need to ask questions if you want to build friendships. By showing interest in her hobbies, you will get to know each other better. Even random questions help you get to know a person better.
   • Ask her to describe herself. This is a quick way to get to know her personality. This is a shortcut on your part, but she will have to honestly describe herself.
   • Find out what she's proud of. Positive questions will allow her to talk about achievements, character traits, and skills.
   • Ask a variety of questions about your “favorite” things - movies, TV shows, or music. You can refuse common interests, which will certainly bring you closer together.
   • Find out her opinion on what interests you. If you ask her opinion about your hobbies, then she will understand that you appreciate her views.
2. 2 Praise her character. Even if the girl looks attractive to you, you are now trying to become her friend, and not hit on her. Try to avoid compliments about her appearance so as not to be in an uncomfortable position, especially if she has a boyfriend. Instead, you can compliment her personality traits that you like.
   • Women are pleased when they are appreciated for their deeds or personal qualities, and not for their appearance. If you happen to see how she participated in a theatrical production, and you liked it, then do not forget to tell her about it. Talk about her positive traits that you can see.
   • The most important thing is that compliments are genuine. No need to quote movie characters or phrases from the Internet. Share with her what delighted you.
   • Women appreciate compliments, but it's important to respect personal space. Do not overdo it with praise, or it may look like despair or feigned irony.
3. 3 Help her. There are various ways to express love for a person. When it comes to friendship, you can express friendly love. By doing a free service to a person, you are showing your participation.
   • These services can range from helping with the meal preparation to offering a ride to a meeting. People often need help, so it's easy to be helpful.
   • Remember that you are not judged by words, but by deeds. You can say compliments as much as you like, but you need to show your friendship with actions. Mutual help strengthens friendship better than words.
4. 4 Make her laugh. Laughter is the best medicine, it lifts your spirits and can strengthen relationships between friends. The girl will definitely like your humor. It will help smooth out any embarrassment or awkwardness that may arise at the initial stage of dating.
   • Laughter creates a positive bond between people. Any friendship is built on a positive relationship.
5. 5 Come up with jokes that only you two can understand. Sharing jokes that others don't understand will make your communication more intimate and will also strengthen your friendship.

Part 2 of 3: Earn Trust

1. 1 Don't flirt. This is extremely important. If you like the girl, then for now, try not to think about romance at all. This is not easy, but you should understand for yourself: you can be her or her friend, or nothing at all. Don't ruin your friendship with your feelings, or embarrass yourself.
2. 2 Behave in the same way as you would with male friends. Seeing this, she will begin to trust you and understand that you are not breaking a comedy. It is not necessary to be rude and vulgar, it is enough just not to try to impress her with every action.
3. 3 Give her time. In order to strengthen a friendship, it is important to devote your undivided attention to it sometimes. Spending time together will have a positive effect on your friendship. Do not forget that you are just friends.
   • Good conversation is an important aspect of having a good time. Always make eye contact and listen carefully. Don't get distracted by other things during the conversation.
   • Compliments and help alone are not enough for trust. Take the time to talk with her, let her express everything that is in her soul. This is what creates trust among friends.
4. 4 Console her. As your friendship develops, don't be afraid to give it the attention it needs. If she is having a difficult period in her life, try to comfort her. In case of trouble, lend a helping hand. She shouldn't feel lonely.
   • Things can get a little tricky if she's having relationship issues. Show kindness and support. Don't let personal feelings affect the situation. First of all, you are friends.
   • Help her make decisions, but don't insist that you are right. You do not need to command, but you also need not remain a passive observer.
   • If necessary, let her give vent to tears. If you are capable of emotional support at this level, then she will be immensely grateful to you.
5. 5 Listen. To gain trust, you need to listen to all of her problems. Become an active listener. You should be able to repeat everything you heard, as well as express your opinion about it. Listen carefully, even if you fundamentally disagree with her. You will still get the opportunity to communicate your opinion, but first, she must fully express herself.
   • Do not be distructed. Sit close enough not to lose track of the conversation. Try to focus all your attention on her, while remembering every detail.
6. 6 Share your own experiences. When you listen to her, it will not hurt you to open up a little to her yourself. Emotional closeness requires stories about yourself. Being an active listener is very important, but it takes two vulnerabilities to build trust.
   • For trust, there must be an unspoken contact between you. Pay attention to what she needs, but she should also be able to be involved.
   • People love to listen to others. Don't hesitate to talk about yourself. You deserve to be heard.

Part 3 of 3: Talking About Your Feelings

1. 1 Understand that this can ruin your friendship. If you find it difficult to be just a friend, then you can reveal the truth. Remember that this is somewhat selfish. So you will cause her a lot of headaches, because you could not accept that she was already busy. By telling her how you feel, you can stop being even just friends.
2. 2 Be gentle. Always express your feelings in a healthy way. Discuss this without getting rude, don't press on her.Your revelation may well surprise her, so try not to embarrass her.
   • Any accusations (even unintentional ones) will hurt her. Do not try to turn the situation as if she herself is to blame. Try to convey the following message: “I hope you don’t think that I am betraying our friendship, but every moment I like you more and more. I know that you like the other, and I am not going to get between you. Just know that if you ever have feelings for me, I will only be glad of it. "
   • Express your feelings correctly, starting with the words "I feel that." If you say “You made me feel that ...” and then describe your emotional state, it will sound accusatory.
   • Express your feelings from your point of view, it should be your subjective experience. She shouldn't feel like a victim.
3. 3 Respect her situation. Don't forget that she's already dating another guy or that she likes someone else. Even if you think you are more suitable for her, then you put her in an uncomfortable position. After all, she also has her own thoughts, plans, hopes and dreams. Her relationship gives her peace and reliability, and you are now trying to change all this.
   • Look for verbal cues when talking to her about it. If a girl tries to change the subject, then she clearly feels uncomfortable. If she doesn't want to talk about it, then be brief and then let her be alone.
4. 4 You should understand its boundaries. If you have a strong friendship, then you should have an idea of ​​its boundaries. It is important not to cross them when communicating this information. Even if you have already had physical intimacy, this situation will be a little different.
5. 5 Open up completely. Being emotionally honest is not easy. Before that, you should sort out your emotions. To be honest, you need to break down all emotional barriers. If you speak openly, you will feel normal regardless of her decision.
   • You are free to decide when is the best time to express your feelings. In such difficult situations, the utmost honesty is required. If you are not ready to express everything, then the girl may not understand you.
   • Society tells us to suppress true feelings, especially those that can be regarded as "irrelevant." Telling a busy girl that you like her is not the most appropriate action. On the other hand, your feelings are real. You have the right to say about them.
6. 6 Respect her decision. In the end, she may well refuse you. Despite all your actions, stability may be more important to her. This is difficult, because you probably already imagined how your relationship will turn out. Despite all the positive qualities, it is important to remember that she is not the best and not the last girl on the planet.
7. 7 Don't let sadness and bitterness consume you. Falling in love with a girl who is already in a relationship, you knew perfectly well that you were stepping into dangerous territory. Respect your friendship by respecting its decision.
   • This decision will be difficult, because you spent time together and became attached to each other. Perhaps you should not see each other for a while. Don't forget that you are still important to her.