Content

• Steps

Everyone regrets something from time to time. Regret can make you mature and develop more, while thinking about the past negatively affects your physical health and emotional state. You can take a variety of steps, from changing your mindset to changing your lifestyle, helping you to cope with the thing you regret and eventually let it go.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Change Your Mind

1. 

   Understand the psychology of regret. Regret is a powerful emotion. Learning how to cope with something you regret means understanding it mentally.
   • Regret is feelings of guilt, sadness, or anger about past decisions. Everyone has regretted something in a certain moment in life, especially young people, but this becomes a big problem when you think about past mistakes, when it makes you become indifferent to your life, career, and personal relationships.
   • Unrealistic thinking leads to regret. This means that the easier it is to imagine another ending, the easier it is for us to regret the decision. Regret peaks when you think you're going to be successful, but let the opportunity slip through due to a lack of planning and action. For example, when you choose the lottery number, the lottery ticket that you did not choose will have the winning number.
   • Regret has negative emotional and physical effects. It can cause mental health problems like depression and anxiety or prolonged stress, leading to a hormonal imbalance and a weakened immune system.
   • The feeling of regret is completely different between men and women. Women who have experienced past relationships often regret their romantic memories before.

2. 

   
   
   Don't try to force yourself. Taking too many responsibilities beyond your capacity will only make you quickly regret it. Learn to relax more than your personal desires and accept that there are so many things in your life that you cannot change, to stop yourself from having to regret it.
   • When you feel sorry for yourself, and think about the things you could do differently, pull yourself out of the situation right away. Ask yourself, "If a friend or family member told me this, what would I say? Should I make it reasonable for me to be blamed like that?"
   • Examine the situation in this situation or decide you are regretful. There are many factors out of control that can affect your judgment. Are you under pressure to make too hasty choices? Does extreme stress diminish the accuracy of your judgment?
   • Let's say you are responsible for managing a charity. For the fundraiser, you have reserved a pretty popular hotel bar / restaurant. A week before the event, the hotel owner calls to alert you that this weekend guests have booked most of the rooms. Since the group of friends is the second person to book, the boss gives preference to the first group. Too panicked, you quickly find another way. You find another restaurant / hotel bar about a mile down the road and a theater that no one booked on the weekends. No more time to weigh pros and cons, you've chosen your second hotel. At the event, the hotel staff had an impolite attitude, the food was not carefully prepared, the rest was a too narrow space to arrange seats for attendees. In this scenario, you will probably regret your decision to have chosen this hotel and just want to hurry to the theater. However, how much control can you have? When you are put in an awkward position and you have to make a quick decision. Even if things don't turn out as expected, don't blame yourself for it.

3. 

   
   
   Admit what you cannot know. Regret, as I said, stems from unrealistic thinking. To stop regretting it, we need to admit that this way of thinking is really harmful. There are many things in this life that we are unaware of.
   • All of our actions have an effect. That is, the impact of our choices cannot be calculated. Usually, the impact of those choices will be evident many years after your decision. Although things may look bad now, we do not know what the future brings and that regretful decision can cause small changes many years later.
   • Remember, when you have to "assume", you will often assume that the scenario will be too far away for you now. In fact, this is not something you probably know. Imagine that "what if" scenario admitting your choice was better. Let's use playing lottery as an example. What if you played that week and won big? If you quit your job, bored, you will end up turning to gambling, alcohol, or drugs just to survive?
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Method 2 of 3: Become a Pioneer

1. 

   
   
   Learn from mistakes yourself. Regret is like any other emotional state; also has a certain lifetime. Open up to the beneficial side of regret to somewhat shorten the time it has existed.
   • Regret is how we learn to reflect on our own actions. We will not be able to grow and change positively if we are not forced to know which decisions will lead to bad consequences in the future. For example, addicts often hold on to their own feelings of regret to give themselves the motivation to quit completely.
   • Refine your thoughts about certain situations or regretful decisions. See those mistakes as opportunities for self-development and change. Young people often deal with regret better, and this is proven because they see it in a positive way. For them, regrets are the key to growth and change.
   • Accept the reprimand. People often make excuses for their actions. This leads to worse decisions, and as a result, even more regret. For example, say you were late for work because you stayed up late to drink alcohol last night. Maybe you use an excuse that you had to go through a stressful week or be pressured by your friends and when you are happy again you will continue to give those excuses. Instead, if you think, "staying up late was a bad decision so I had to suffer the consequences", you will avoid the same situation in the future. You think you are more able to control a situation than directing it to outside influences.

2. 

   Allow yourself to be sad and disappointed. Sometimes, when a situation is particularly unfavorable, we also need to feel sad. Allow yourself to feel frustrated in the right amount of time to lift yourself up later.
   • Sadness as well as regret; It is a kind of negative emotion, but it is also very helpful to us. Feelings of sadness will concentrate your mind, allowing you to appreciate all of your problems and find ways to deal with life's problems.
   • It is normal to react to bad situations with sadness. Avoiding these emotions only prolongs your feelings of regret and disappointment. After a massive setback, take a week to grieve the loss and experience your disappointment.

3. 

   Consider relationships. Often our most regretful moments come from bad relationships with friends, relatives and other important people in your life.
   • If you're going through a tough time, this will lead to your sadness and regret, will your friends get through it with you? Who will comfort and help you and who will fade into your heart?
   • Acknowledge them, who are not mentally supportive and who, in the past, have put you in a dilemma. As long as you continue to nurture those poor personal relationships, you will end up only regretting it. Break ties with people who are not on your side and get closer to those who do it for you.

4. 

   Decide how to act. That being said, seeing regret as an opportunity to grow, means that you will be less likely to look back at past mistakes. However, you need to be prepared to take action. Find out what you need to do to get over your regrets.
   • Is anyone hurt by the decision you made? Will the consequences of your actions affect your friends or family members? You will probably need to call or write a few letters. If necessary, take a moment to apologize.
   • Write your feelings down on paper. "I'm sad about X, Y, and Z". "I'm angry at X, Y, and Z". Then look back at your listing once you're done, and evaluate what led to your current thinking. What else would you have done differently? What brings all of these emotions out and how can you get rid of them?
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Method 3 of 3: Lifestyle Changes

1. 

   Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is the psychological state in which you are aware of the present moment. Mindful-Mindful Behavior Therapy has been used quite successfully to treat depression caused by regret.
   • Being mindful means watching one's thoughts from afar. You can objectively evaluate your past and your mistakes, allowing you to realize that these feelings of regret have an effect on your life.
   • Meditation can help with mindfulness.Focus on taking deep breaths or paying attention to a word or phrase. Allow that thought flow to enter your mind and avoid judgment during the experience.
   • Pay attention to bodily sensations, such as itching and breathing. Take note of all senses, such as sight, smell, hearing, and taste. Try to be aware of your surroundings and how you feel.
   • Tasting your emotions without judgment. Allow yourself to experience sadness, fear, anger, and pain without trying to give up or suppress those emotions.
   • If you succeed, mindfulness will help you focus more on the present moment. This prevents you from looking at the past and past decisions. Focusing on what you have control over now will help reduce your judgment about old decisions and memories. Mindfulness therapy is also especially helpful for elderly patients who feel regretful about their own lives.

2. 

   Strive for abstract goals. The disappointment and regret has repeatedly prevented us from achieving our goals. Changing the way we think about our goals and achievements can help us better cope with our regret and accept the present.
   • Try to achieve abstract achievements from your long-term goals. Say "In 5 years, I want to be always happy" instead of assertive "In 5 years, I want to reach the top of my career". In this way, you realize that your thinking helps you get the results you want, which is something you have control over, not an aspect of your life that is always out of your control.
   • Research shows that specific rewards often do not make people happier than the great achievements they achieve. People who chase money, fame, wealth, and a successful career are often not as happy as those striving for abstract goals such as self-pleasure, good relationships, and more. Another thing that needs mind manipulation.

3. 

   Discuss it. What could be more priceless if there are supporters, when faced with disappointment, causing self-regret. Speaking out about your feelings can help you better understand your feelings and become more aware of your standpoint from an outsider's perspective.
   • Talk to a friend or relative when you feel down. Letting yourself worsen will only worsen feelings of disappointment over time. Choose someone who has the same experience and understands you.
   • If you find it difficult to overcome feelings of disappointment, try treatment. The therapist can provide an objective perspective on your role as a third person in your case as well as offer advice to help you overcome negative attitudes.

4. 

   Current rating. Regret comes from the choice you want to lose it. Appreciating the present, and appreciating the positives, can help reduce feelings of regret.
   • Regret is often the result of imbalance in thinking. Clinging to a particular decision, or a series of decisions, the distortion of truth has the ability to judge our lives when excessive focus is always on the negative side.
   • Write down all the positive aspects of your life, such as family, friends, work, and any successes you have achieved so far. In fact, each situation has its advantages and disadvantages. The problem is, when we regret it, we only see its downside in the short term. Cherishing the good of the present is a great way to reduce your feelings of regret.
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