Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Start with small changes
• Part 2 of 3: Become More Outgoing
• Part 3 of 3: Learn Humility

If you begin to notice that you think too much about yourself, or someone called you a narcissistic egoist, then you need to learn to be more modest in your relationships with people around you. In this article, you will learn how to properly communicate with people and be more humble in your daily life.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Start with small changes

1. 1 Try to take part in some game in which you will definitely lose. If you find it hard to come to terms with the fact that someone is superior to you, then first of all learn to lose. You must realize that this is not the end of the world.
   • To a narcissist, it seems that losing is tantamount to death. You have to take part in some small competition and lose in it. Try to accept failure with dignity.
   • Congratulate the winner, even if he is clearly bragging about his victory. Shake his hand, look into his eyes and say, "It was a good game."
2. 2 Thank others for even minor favors. If you are not used to expressing gratitude sincerely, then start doing it at least fake. If someone does you a favor, be sure to say thank you. Learning to notice the efforts of others and thank them for what they do for you will help you deal with your own selfishness and narcissism.
   • Thank the driver as you exit the bus. In a restaurant, when the waiter serves you a glass of water, look him in the eye and say thank you. Thank your mom when she gives you a ride to school. Learn to notice things to be grateful for.
   • Give thanks to others, even if you think they could have put in more effort.
3. 3 When talking to people, make eye contact with them. Whatever you feel, good eye contact is a great opportunity to show respect for the other person, even if you disagree with what they are telling you or are not interested in it.
   • In addition to making eye contact, you need to learn to listen. Nod your head to indicate that you are listening to your interlocutor. Summarize what has been said before answering something. Show your conversation partner that you are listening.
4. 4 Listen when the person says something to you. If you look around the room with a bored look, listening to conversations, instead of listening carefully to a friend who tells you something, then you are acting like a narcissistic egoist.When communicating with someone, you need to pay attention to that person, focusing on what he is saying. Learn to listen to what others are saying to you when discussing topics that interest them.
   • Ask questions and show that you are really interested in what the other person is talking about. Follow the conversation and ask questions like, "How did you feel?" or "Well, what happened next?"
5. 5 Read novels. Recently, scientists have found that people who are addicted to reading fiction are better at empathizing with others. By reading good books, you can learn to understand and consider other people's feelings. If you find yourself focusing too much on yourself, take this opportunity to change your personality for the better. To do this, simply sign up for the library.
   • Of course, after reading just one book, you will not be able to immediately eradicate selfishness in yourself. But the main thing is to start. Set a goal for yourself - to learn how to take the place of another person.

Part 2 of 3: Become More Outgoing

1. 1 Get help when you need it. People who are too self-centered can often find it difficult to admit they were wrong and ask someone for help. Don't learn from your mistakes. It is better to learn to admit that you do not know everything and are able to, asking for help from those who can and want to help you.
   • By asking for help from another person, you thereby acknowledge that he is superior to you in something, knows something or is better than you. However, there is nothing wrong with that. On the contrary, it's good.
2. 2 Let others take responsibility for themselves. Are you used to having your opinion reckoned with? Next time, in the company, do not try to immediately take the initiative into your own hands, but give the opportunity to others to prove themselves.
   • If you decide to spend the evening with friends, does it really matter where you go for dinner? If there are five of you, then everyone can have their own opinion, but you can only go to one place. Just give in to someone else and do not insist on yours.
   • Of course, you need to be able to defend your opinion, but only if there really is a need for it. For example, if your opinion is constantly ignored, or if you are sure that your offer is the best option for everyone. Stopping being selfish does not mean becoming spineless.
3. 3 Learn to express yourself in no uncertain terms. Much of what may seem selfish from someone's side is often not. If you cannot always correctly understand what the person meant, then it is better to ask him again.
   • Don't look for ulterior motives in someone's words or actions. If your mom asks if you want some salad, then she's probably not trying to hint at your excess weight. Although it may be, such assumptions will only make you more focused on yourself.
   • Shyness is sometimes mistaken for narcissism or self-centeredness. Don't expect someone to read your mind. If you have something to say or need help, then speak up. Don't expect everyone to ask questions.
4. 4 Don't make the conversation a competition. Narcissistic people often choose their own persona as the topic of conversation. Pay attention if you are not trying to talk to the interlocutor or show off in a conversation at any cost. If so, something needs to be changed. Don't wait for your turn to speak, or try to mentally jot down the next phrase to wow everyone. Just listen carefully to your interlocutor and answer his questions.
   • Do not try to necessarily "outperform" the interlocutor. If someone has shared with you the joy of having a used bike for your birthday, then you shouldn't tell them that your father bought you a new car.

Part 3 of 3: Learn Humility

1. 1 Leave your comfort zone. If you are used to living in your inner world, it is not surprising that you feel too self-centered.Do not be afraid to experience something new, unusual, try to do something that scares you. The more you learn, the easier it will be to show humility.
   • Even if you think you are good at something, be open to new knowledge. To continue self-development, do not be afraid to doubt the common truths. Raise serious questions and seek answers to them.
   • Get to know better the characteristics of other cultures. To do this, you do not have to go on a long trip abroad, you can get to know the people who live near you better.
2. 2 Find people who share your views, interests, tastes. Some may find it difficult to admit that they are not one of a kind. Whatever your interests, there will always be people who like what you like. Even if you like gramophone records with terrible sound quality or Italian horror films. Find your like-minded people and communicate with them more often.
   • Discover a new religion and start going to church. This will help you think less about yourself.
   • Start attending a club. Find a computer club if you enjoy playing video games. Go to the gym if you enjoy sports.
3. 3 Meet new people. If your environment is limited to a few people with whom you are comfortable hanging out, then try to meet someone else. This way you will get to know not only others better, but also yourself. You don't have to tell them that you were selfish.
   • Get to know people who are different from you better. If you work in an office, then talk to some worker, and if you live on a living wage, then talk to a well-earning company manager. Go bowling together. Get to know these people better and find out how they live.
4. 4 Get to know someone you dislike. Learn to be tactful and kind to those people who get on your nerves. This will help you fight selfishness. If you feel like you are thinking too much of yourself, make it a rule to be friendly to those you dislike, trying to change your attitude towards them.
   • Try to understand why people act in a certain way. If your little sister repeats everything you do, stop blaming her for it. Surely she does this because you are a role model for her. Let him do what he wants.
5. 5 Try your hand as a volunteer. When you give without expecting anything in return, you are acting altruistically. To overcome your selfishness, you can volunteer with a volunteer or non-profit organization whose ideals you share. Search the Internet for volunteer organizations in your area.