Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 4: How to bond with a shy girl
• Method 2 of 4: Take the first step
• Method 3 of 4: How to flirt with body language
• Method 4 of 4: Watch the girl's reaction

Do you like a girl, but she is very shy, and you do not know how to approach to melt her heart? You do not know for sure if she likes you, perhaps the girl is too nervous and afraid to take the first step, so she does not flirt with you. If you like a shy girl, there are several ways you can bond with her and convince her to open up to you so that she begins to treat you as more than just a friend or buddy.

Steps

Method 1 of 4: How to bond with a shy girl

1. 1 Start a conversation. Start a conversation on a neutral topic - most likely, the girl will be intimidated if you are too persistent. Introduce yourself if this is your first time chatting. You can say that you noticed that she is doing something interesting, and you want to compliment her or help her.
   • Say something completely ordinary: “Hi, my name is Misha. I see you in the library every day. What are you reading?" or “You did a great job! Why did you decide to take this particular topic? By the way, my name is Sasha. "
2. 2 Ask her open-ended questions. This will make it easier to keep the conversation going and motivate her to open up and share her thoughts with you. You can ask her anything: from what day she has, to what kind of music she usually listens to, what cafes she likes to go to. Questions should depend on the topic of the conversation. There is no need to ask several unrelated questions in a row - this can embarrass her.
   • For more detailed answers, it is best to ask questions that begin with “how” or “why”.
   • Pay attention to her interests. If you start chatting, you will need to arrange a date based on her preferences.
3. 3 Begin to be interested in what she is. Find out what she likes. From your favorite movies and hobbies to your favorite sports, let it open up to you. During the conversation, you need to ask her questions so that she talks about herself, and also share your interests and hobbies with her. Think about what you have in common and talk about it. Understand that she may be shy at first and respond with short phrases. However, if you are persistent and give her enough time, she will most likely get used to you and be more interested in communication.
   • One way to talk to a girl about her hobbies is to say, “Oh, I really liked Finding Dory too! It was so interesting to watch the characters. What was your favorite moment? "
   • If you are studying at the same school, you can ask her to help you with your homework. This will give you the opportunity to spend more time together.
4. 4 Don't rush things. Patience is key when flirting with a shy girl. You need her to feel comfortable with you. Be friendly, ask questions, share information about yourself with each other, show interest in it. If at first she will be comfortable just saying hello to you, wait a week. Next week, ask how her day went. Gradually communicate more and more. SPECIALIST'S ADVICE

   

   Elvina Lui, MFT

   
   
   Family Therapist Alvin Louis is a Licensed Family and Marriage Psychotherapist based in San Francisco. Specializes in relationship consulting. She received her Master's Degree in Counseling Psychology from Western Seminary in 2007 and interned at the Asian Family Institute in San Francisco and New Life Community Services in Santa Cruz. She has over 13 years of experience in psychological counseling and has been trained in a harm reduction model.

   Elvina Lui, MFT
   Family psychotherapist

   Be persistent. “If you think she is shy, I advise you to give her more time to show her sympathy for you. If she's holding on to it, don't give up too quickly. " However, if she makes it clear that she is not interested in you, respect her wishes.

   
   
5. 5 Start spending more time together. Find several reasons to be with her (for example, you can sit next to her for lunch, sit next to her in class, or work together on the same project. If you know that she goes to the gym in the morning, sign up there at the same time to talk a little with her, or at least just say hello.You need to be constantly present in her life.
   • Be careful not to overdo it when visiting the places where she is. You just need to try to befriend her, pick a few places where you can spend time together (several times a week) in order to be close and close to her.

Method 2 of 4: Take the first step

1. 1 Walk up to her while she sits alone. It is much better to flirt with a girl while you are alone, because she can be embarrassed in company. Leave your friends for a while and take time to talk to the girl you like.
   • If you are at school, you can talk to the girl when she leaves her outerwear in the locker room or walks to the bus.
2. 2 Compliment the girl. The girl may be shy, but she will likely appreciate that you spot her new hairstyle or cute blouse. It is best to compliment any personality trait you like. For example, kindness, cheerfulness, a sense of humor. This will increase her self-confidence and she will feel more comfortable with you.
3. 3 Suggest an activity that interests both of you. This will help you spend more time together, as well as get to know each other better and start building relationships. Suggest something simple. For example, you can have lunch together at recess or go to the movies with a company (if you see that she is more comfortable in the company).
   • You don't have to try to arrange a date or something. All you have to do is find a way to get to know each other. A date can scare and embarrass a girl, so first she will need to “warm up” - get to know the person with whom she could go on a date.

Method 3 of 4: How to flirt with body language

1. 1 Break down the physical barrier between you. Lightly touch her arm, wrist, or shoulder while talking - just for a second or two, this is enough for her to understand your sign. Touch her gently when she says something you agree with or something funny.
2. 2 Make sure your body language is open. Hug her and lean towards her a little so that you can hear her better if she speaks softly. This will help her feel comfortable even when there are only a few centimeters between you. But if the girl is trying to pull away, do not insist, otherwise you will scare her away.
   • Don't cross your arms. If a girl is intently observing your movements, she may think that you are not interested in her (because of your posture).
3. 3 Maintain eye contact. A few seconds will be enough for her to see that you are looking at her, and then look away. Eye contact is a very powerful tool that will definitely interest her. At first, you can just exchange quick glances, but over time you can look into her eyes for longer, if, of course, she will reciprocate you.

Method 4 of 4: Watch the girl's reaction

1. 1 See if she loves you. A modest girl will not just flirt with a guy, so if you see her flirting with you, you can be sure that she is interested in you. A girl can flirt in different ways: often look you in the eyes, put "I like" under your statuses and posts on social networks, start a conversation with you, demonstrating coquetry with the help of body language.
2. 2 Be patient. If the girl is shy and shy, she most likely needs proof that you are serious about her. Therefore, you need to behave in such a way that she does not doubt your sympathy for her.
   • If you greeted her yesterday, say hello today. If you smiled at her when you met her on your way to the dining room, smile at her again so she doesn't think you're just being polite. Try to meet her eyes several times a day. The girl will understand your attention signs correctly if you repeat them several times.
3. 3 Give her time. It may take weeks or even months for the girl to be ready to flirt with you. It may take her longer to understand and accept your courtesies.
   • Set a time limit for when you think the ice should melt between you. For example, tell yourself that if, after two months of flirting with her, you still don’t spend enough time together, you will either leave her or try flirting in a different way.
4. 4 Flirt by texting or chatting on social media. If you notice that the girl remains indifferent to your signs of attention, try flirting with her on the social network. Perhaps the girl is not as comfortable communicating with you personally as texting on VKontakte. Exchange messages to get her used to communicating with you. Thus, the girl will be able to "open up" to you, because over time she will be quite comfortable with you.
5. 5 Change your flirting style. Observe how the girl reacts to your flirting. The girl may completely "shut out" from you when you try to make eye contact with her. But be sociable, take an interest in her hobbies. Your goal is to adjust to the situation and adjust your flirting to fit her comfort zone. If you succeed, over time it will be possible to transfer communication to another level.
6. 6 Try to figure out if she likes you or not. If a girl responds positively to your body language, she will likely respond in kind to you. If you notice that in your presence she begins to get nervous, blush or stammer, then she likes you. If a girl is nervous because she likes you, she may tease you or make fun of you.
   • If she doesn't like you, you will realize that she is not interested in your courtesies. She will show "closed" body language, she will not look you in the eyes, she may become even quieter and more modest than usual.