Content

• Steps
• Advice

Whether you just broke up with your lover or recently divorced, separated from someone you love never is easy. Sometimes it can make you feel like you'll never be as happy again - that that person was the only chance in the world for you to be loved and now they're gone. Do not give in to these thoughts. The truth is that with a bit of optimism, patience, and determination, you will always be able to get through the dark after love breaks.

Steps

Part 1 of 2: Getting over the breakup

1. 

   Throw out anything that reminds you of him / her. Finally, there will come a time when you can think about your ex without feeling too emotional. However, that was not now. Now, remembering your time with the other person can lead to intense feelings of nostalgia, sadness, and regret. So, it's a good idea to get rid of the things in your life that remind you of your old relationship. If these are items that you cannot throw away, try storing them in a box and keeping them somewhere you will not be able to use for the time being. Here are a few items that you may want to look for:
   • Items of his / her ex that he / she has left behind
   • Gifts that the person gave you
   • The song or mixtape that the person made for you
   • Pictures, paintings or illustrations that remind you of your ex

2. 

   
   
   Avoid contact with the person. Unless you are 100% sure that you can "just be friends" with your ex (and he / she is 100% sure too), avoid seeing the person as much as possible at least. a month or two. When you must meet them, keep your conversations as short and polite as possible. This will be very difficult, but it is extremely important. Interacting can lead to awkward situations when you both think about your old relationship. You can even get back to your ex and start flirting with each other. Whatever the case, it does never is an effective way to get through the whole breakup.
   • For now, this should also apply to the technological connections of the two. Seriously consider "unlinking" or blocking the person on social media sites (at least during this time period). You may also want to delete the person's phone number from your contacts to reduce your desire to text them.

3. 

   
   
   Improve your mind with physical activity. Being active is a great way to begin feeling good with yourself after a difficult experience. Not only is it less expensive, it's fun too; It has also been shown that exercise improves mood and fights depression. Above all, if you stick to this, you will begin to notice changes in your appearance and emotions, and at the same time will be more confident, and that will make overcoming sadness. should be easier.
   • Read some articles on how to exercise for more helpful tips on starting a new exercise routine.

4. 

   
   
   Rely on your support network. It's not a good idea to be alone after a breakup. It is easy to fall into negative thoughts and over-criticize yourself. Being around close friends will help you see things more clearly. Friends and family will give you helpful advice (which you should listen to), and they are always there to comfort and reassure you when you feel difficult. Remember that things won't get better just because of the people are not mention it.
   • If you aren't around close people, take advantage of everything else you can. Calling and talking via Skype will be very helpful. You can even make new friends, but don't be in a hurry to start a new relationship.

5. 

   Always value yourself. Remember friend is the most important person in my life. Remembering this will make it easier for you to focus on yourself instead of the person you have lost. Be confident in the positive aspects and accept all your own flaws; everyone has certain shortcomings. Focus on being the best person you can be. Happiness does not come from others but comes from yourself.
   • You can even try thinking of your ex with pity. Losing you is something that person will regret once he / she realizes how precious you truly are.
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Part 2 of 2: Moving forward with my life

1. 

   Accept that you used to love that person but now all is in the past. Love can still be completely real even if it doesn't last forever. You may love someone deeply for a while, but then that love ends. Just because a relationship has ended doesn't mean it is a waste of your time. That love has moved deep in your heart and created who you are. As is often said, it is better to have loved and lost than never loved once.
   • A big part of this is forgiveness. Forgive yourself for not being able to continue together. Forgive the other person for wanting to leave (if you are going to maintain their friendship later on, this is essential). Forgive the other person or yourself for the problems that led to the breakup. Both of you are just normal human beings.

2. 

   Be active and organized. Once you've taken some time to recover from a crush, get to work. See your new independence as an opportunity to focus on improving your life.Now is the time for you to achieve successes that can help you feel good with yourself and in a better position than before. Here are some reference examples:
   • Dedicate yourself to your work. Accept ambitious new assignments. Take on more responsibilities. Ask for a raise or a promotion.
   • Start a new hobby. Learn how to play an instrument. Learn a new language. Start writing a story or journal.
   • Explore the world. Traveling. Meet new people. Explore the wilderness (with reasonable safety measures)

3. 

   Open your heart to new relationships. After a tough breakup, it's better to put off a relationship for a month or two to avoid the emotional problems that often arise with "alternate" relationships. However, once you take a break, you can consider, talk, and have feelings for someone. This may make you feel a little sad or uncomfortable at first. This is a completely normal thing. Basically, you're going through a separation from someone you've talked to and met often before. This will gradually fade over time.
   • When a new person walks in, open up to them. Don't worry about falling in love so much that you can't enjoy life present. Even if it's just a mild crush, it's okay to have feelings for someone else.

4. 

   Live in the present. No matter how badly you or the other person made a mistake in the past, you can't change it. What happened also happened. Accepting this can be very difficult; some people feel extremely scared by letting go. However, unless you start thinking more about it present Instead of spending time with someone you once loved, you won't be able to truly move on with your life.
   • This will take time, so be patient. You probably won't be able to stop yourself from thinking about your past love for a while. However, as long as you focus on yourself and don't allow yourself to give in to your troubles and pessimistic thoughts, you will eventually begin to forget the person.

5. 

   Looking to the future. Sometimes, you feel like you will never be as happy as you used to be. As time passes, this thought will become more and more irrational. Actually, you always can look forward to a brighter future. There will always be new people to meet, new experiences to learn, and bright new days to look forward to. Your happiness is not determined by what happened in the past but by what you prepare for the future.

6. 

   Let your memories of that person fade away. Time will heal all wounds. Immediately after breaking up, it may feel like you can't go a minute without thinking how much you miss the person. Gradually, however, over the weeks and months, these thoughts will appear less and less. Finally, you will be able to go through the day without thinking sadly about your ex. Basically, you will "forget" your sadness. When this happens, see it as an important achievement. You did it! Life is waiting for you ahead.
   • This doesn't mean that you need to stop thinking about the person entirely. You can keep the memories of them in your heart, but they shouldn't be anything that interferes with your life. They should be feelings of tenderness and nostalgia, like thoughts about someone you love that has passed away.
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Advice

• Don't fall victim to the "The Only Half" myth, a belief that there is only one suitable person for you. This is completely unrealistic. Each of them has many suitable halves. None of them are perfect; all have defects in a certain way. The person who hurt you is not the only one for you. You will find the next person (and possibly the next) and will also give them love.
• While it may seem like "forgetting" your ex can be a very effective cure for pain, you don't have to forget everything you learn from the relationship. Whether you like it or not, that relationship is a part of who you are today. Try to learn from the positive and negative things of a past relationship so that your next relationship will improve.
• If you can't seem to start feeling better and a month or so has passed, you're probably depressed. Talk to your doctor or therapist; It is perfectly normal to get the help you need.