Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

This article is a general guide to those who are born female but identify themselves as men. You don't have to make a complete physical transition: It doesn't matter when you decide to stop at a stage where you feel fine. You can always convert further if you want, but most of the time you can't.

Steps

1. 

   Accept yourself. The first important part of a transition is accepting yourself. This is probably something you have known for a long time, or just realized / accepted. Spend a lot of time thinking about things, finding information, crying out of sadness, doing whatever needs to be done. You must know that you are not alone because there are a lot of transgender people.
   • Try to find a local support group where you can meet people like you, hear their stories, gather more information, ask questions, and accept yourself.
   • Try to find out what you need to do to find peace.Some transgender people are completely satisfied with just wearing the clothes that match their recognized true gender, or want others to call him him or use the common pronoun (last name). Others feel the need to do something more with their bodies in order to get the right recognition and to accept themselves in the mirror, so they want hormone therapy (testosterone injections or medication in the form of gel or cream). Some transgender people find it so uncomfortable that they need to completely convert, meaning that a full surgery (top and / or bottom) is needed. Remember, you don't have to rush to decide, in fact, there is still a long way to go. Some people get annoyed just because the process is so slow. (Hormones take months to years to work, beard may not grow thick, some insurance countries do not cover this surgery and are too expensive, etc.)

2. 

   
   
   Public. There is no "right" time to go public with transgender people, and it is not necessary to take the second step in the transition. That is something you should consider cautiously if you have determined that the disclosure is for your own benefit. Know that you have no moral obligation to open up to others, if it is up to you to do so. This will be a very long process and a very difficult one - you need to build a support network of people ready to help.
   • Maybe you should first confess to a really close friend or to your parents (prefer them if you are living with them). Writing a letter is perfect if you are not good at speaking or not know what to say.
   • You can check your family's attitudes on this topic by mentioning a transgender man in an article. Find something funny like a "pregnant man" and discuss it with them. Wait to see how they react before coming out with themselves, especially if you are underage. In some families there is a risk of physical violence. Don't go public unless you feel safe and have a plan for "worst case scenario" if the situation turns violent.
   • Most people will ask lots of questions (especially relatives). Armed with knowledge, knowing what to do next, and the options at the end of the road you're looking at. Be patient with their questions and don't tease the naive things they say. Don't be vague or uncertain about your plan, as they may see it as a sign that you haven't thought through the problem well or thought that it might convince you to stop the transition. Certainly, with each example you give to prove that you belong to a different gender (such as being uncomfortable playing with a group of girls, wanting to be a capital, or dreaming of becoming a famous footballer when you were a child) will be confronted. With arguments like why that's okay with every other girl, because they're trying to prove you wrong.
   • There are a number of support groups available to families and transgender partners if they want to join. You can find out online about PFLAG and they have branches throughout the United States. You can also go with them to gatherings if you join a group that allows it (ask permission in advance because these groups are often confidential).
   • People often confuse transgender people with homosexuals, so it can be difficult to understand when you come out. From transgender to human SEX identity - a transgender person can have any of the same sexual orientation: homosexual, straightforward, bisexual, asexual, and so on. Perhaps the confusion arises when they do not know how to "call" people in the transition process. So if you are transgender you are a man, which means you need to explain to everyone that you are gay if you like guys, you are straight if you like girls, and you are bisexual if you like men. Gay men and straight women, but no matter who you date you are a man. Another reason for people to confuse transsexuals with homosexuals comes from people dressed in different sexes (who are described by the media as homosexual but sometimes as straightforward), and lesbians with masculinity. sure not to be a man but dressed like a man, fake male and female are gay or not.
   • Remember whether someone is confused or surprised with your publicity, they should always respect you as much as you respect them, regardless of whether they fully understand or not. If someone sees you as burdening or yelling at you, seriously consider severing relationships with them.

3. 

   
   
   Become a man. If you haven't done this yet, you'll probably want to be dressed up as a man to show the outside of your true gender. There are a number of sites out there that offer advice on how to "act" like a guy, but you'll probably find that advice ineffective, since you don't want to act, but be yourself. Some advice for transgender people is to be rude, spit, talk profanely and swear, take up a lot of space by keeping your legs open even when riding the bus, and walk sideways. Most men around you probably don't, so you'd better just observe previously taught femininity and give it up.
   • Careful and delicate about how to express it. The fact that you suddenly change before going public can shock your parents, leading to stress and less comfortable communication. If at school, especially elementary and high school, or work, you will cause a lot of trouble with your friends and colleagues. At first, you should limit the "switching" to within your family, or in public when it is difficult to meet someone you know. When you are ready to try on clothes that match your gender at school or work, you should do it in stages, for example, to dress up and wear masculine clothes, then replace with men's shirts, jeans or shoes, and then slowly cut your hair down if you like. Slow conversions are better in the long run, as long as it's up to you. Now you are in charge of your own destiny.
   • Feel free to give information to classmates and colleagues about transgender people so that you feel more comfortable with your new look. Again, not everyone in this world has the accepting attitude they should have, sometimes they might say something hurtful and false. Respond calmly to each issue, talking to the support team if needed, even if it's just online.
   • Remember that being a man doesn't mean you have to give up everything female. If you have women's interests, personality traits or fashion choices, you don't have to give it all up. Feminine men are also men. Less girly men may have an easier "transition" period, but it's better to be yourself unless you're in a situation where you can't do so for safety reasons.

4. 

   
   
   Find a therapist. This is important for two reasons. First, transgender people often have experiences that may cause stress or restlessness, such as fearful harassment / assault, or feelings of insecurity. Transgender people have a high rate of depression and suicidal thoughts (about 50%). You often want to talk to other people to solve these problems and feelings. The second reason is, before you can go any further, you need a psychologist to confirm that you are indeed transgender, so that they will refer you to an endocrinologist for treatment. Using hormones and surgeons to perform different surgeries, although in some places this is no longer true as changes in the DSM 5 (Handbook for Statistics and Diagnosis of Mental Diseases) have eliminated transgender from mental illness list (note: homosexuality has been long removed). Surgeons in the US (minimum of legal practitioners) will not perform surgery below the waist without the note of a doctor or psychologist.Never buy testosterone online or homemade! Your doctor or psychologist will ask you to see an endocrinologist for a blood test to check the level of hormones. They absolutely cannot give you too much testosterone, otherwise your body will turn into estrogen and ruin your plans. So if the regulations require you to see a psychologist then do so and wait patiently. If you are lucky enough to live in a place that doesn't have this regulation, the process will be faster.
   • It's best to look for an upper half surgeon or a psychologist who specializes in examining transgender people. If you can't find such a person, try joining a support group or checking online to see who they can refer (and which doctors should avoid).
   • The transsexuals are a very important step in life, so don't rush. If they find a doctor, they need several appointments to see you for a definitive diagnosis, so they continue to work with you through the transition.

5. 

   Plan. There are many steps to consider, like hormone use, surgery, full disclosure with people you work with / live with or interact with, so a basic orientation is very helpful. It will show you everything in the panoramic view, get you on the right track, track resources, make a list of good doctors, plan when to change names on legal papers (driver's license, passport, birth certificate, etc.) and motivate you to budget (it costs a lot of money, because most insurance plans don't cover everything, you need to save a few hundred million dong) .
   • Try to be realistic. You usually want to get everything done in a year, but it takes many years to get it done. If you want a full-blown transition, your realistic goal will be around five years. This is a step-by-step adjustment time, and also for family, friends and colleagues time to get acquainted. The therapist can motivate you during the step-by-step preparation process, in some states in the US and elsewhere around the world it is imperative that you have been fully male for one year before be treated with hormones or surgery (though this is changing).
   • A therapist is the best person for you to help you plan. They know the amount of time it takes to wait between steps and probably know what is plausible based on their experiences with other patients. If you can't see a therapist, ask transgender support group members, as they have gone through these steps.

6. 

   Hormone therapy begins (optional). Not all transgender men choose Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT), for a variety of reasons, including cost or because the body has a "T" (sensitivity to sex hormones). male), which makes them neither more masculine nor transgender. Transgender men are very fortunate when it comes to testosterone, also known as a "T", as it is very powerful and will change the body over time, unlike the estrogen used for transgender women. Testosterone helps the body look more masculine by:
   • regulates fat distribution, moves fat away from hips, buttocks, thighs, and chest (small amount) and delivered to the abdomen (fat won't lose but redistribution, so you still have to exercise to lose weight) .
   • increase muscle mass (if you exercise, if you are sedentary, then you won't be able to do it), increase shoulder width and potentially thicken your hands and feet (can make hands and feet wider thanks to cartilage growth, but uncertainty).
     • The increase in muscle reshaping and redistribution of fat often results in a more square face (if you are under 21 you can grow a forbidden fruit).
     • Men can burn fat faster because they develop muscles easily (the process of burning a lot of fat) and eventually you will lose some belly fat (but first you will gain a lot of weight because of frequent colds). you feel hungry, but remember that you cannot lose weight with testosterone if you are inactive, you have to stimulate your metabolism regardless of being male or female.)
     • Most men report feeling stronger after testosterone treatment.
   • More body hair and facial hair growth (loss of hair on the temples, sometimes leading to male pattern baldness that cannot be reversed even if you stop using testosterone).
   • Make the voice quieter (similar to the phenomenon of breaking sound 'in puberty in boys and may lose the vocal range when singing).
   • Skin is thicker and its resistance to cold increases.
   • Change in body odor and increase sweating.
   • Testosterone can help your body grow a little more if you haven't passed puberty and are still growing.
   • Testosterone also stops the menstrual cycle, usually for 3 months (depending on dose).
   • Sex drive will increase, as well as more appetite.
   • The clitoris begins to develop. The clitoris and penis develop from the same cell type in the embryonic stage, and T stimulates it to grow. Usually the clitoris will grow to 2-5cm.
     • This is important for penile plastic surgery (one of two options for lower part surgery), which is the procedure that uses the clitoris to form a penis.
   • Starting hormone treatment is like going through puberty a second time; Note that if you have just cleared up acne, you may reappear or have more oily skin (prepare to buy acne cream for men).
   • There is no exact timeframe for appearance changes, but the menstrual cycle stops for 6 months. The voice will become low for up to about 6 months to a year later, similar to clitoral development.
   • Most are using injectable testosterone, but you can replace it with pills, patches, creams, or gels. The cost of testosterone therapy is not the same, depending on the dose, drug form, and insurance (if you do not have insurance you must pay for it yourself; if you have insurance, some policies cover the therapy. hormones for transsexuals, some don't Note that some colleges have a student insurance program that will cover part or all of the cost of hormonal treatment, and sometimes some cost of surgery).
   • Some transgendered men choose to have upper surgery before getting T therapy. There are many reasons for this: some choose to have the upper part surgery first because if you have breasts when you start to look like a man would be very embarrassing; for others, surgery on the upper part is not only for the appearance but also for psychological reasons - society often considers the breasts to represent women, and for many transgender people, the chest is the uncomfortable part and not. most wanted. In some cases, surgery on the upper part before using T gives better results, others using T first gives better results, so you must consult your doctor and doctor. Have surgery to see which is best for you. But there are also people who choose to use the dress to reduce breast size while saving money on surgery; they also started weight-loss programs to try to lose breast size and have more options for upper surgery (there are three types based on breast size; note that not everyone who loses weight will lose tissue size. chest).

7. 

   Change name. Most transgender people choose a male name for friends and relatives to call at the beginning of the transition. Usually before you start using T is the best time to change your name, as you will actually look like a man. You will have to check the laws in your state / country. There is usually a fee for the renaming process.
   • Be sure to update your government-issued official identity (driver's license, social security number, social insurance, etc.) with a new name and a new photo if required by law. You should also notify the school or workplace, especially when you are required to bring your identification with you to school or work (Note: If you live in a dormitory, there will be a problem if you are in the female dormitory.Some schools provide private rooms for transgender students during the transition, others still let them live in student rooms of the gender they are transferring to. However, many schools will not do this until you conform to the definition of the transgender law. You must first check with the school so you don't be surprised).

8. 

   Perform surgery. Like HRT, not all transgender men choose surgery. If you feel fine with your body without surgery, you can. Transgender men's bodies come in all shapes and sizes, just as for men. There are actually three types of surgeries you can choose from to become more manly.
   • Upper surgery: removing breast tissue and shaping a more masculine breast. There are a number of different procedures available depending on breast size, skin elasticity, and what you like (scarring, recovery time, risks / benefits). The three main surgeries are:
     • Surgery to remove both breasts (if you have bust sizes C, D or larger, this is your only option)
     • Surgery to remove the breast under the skin good The Keyhole technique (best for people with little breast tissue, like size AA)
     • Surgery to remove the breast under the skin good Peri-Areolar Technology (Does not create as many scars as Keyhole, but if the chest is larger than size B then cannot do it)
   • Surgery to remove the uterus. This surgery is usually done in conjunction with surgery to remove the ovaries and bilateral fallopian tubes.
     • Since testosterone stops menstrual cycles, some doctors predict this may increase the risk of reproductive organ cancer (more studies are underway to determine that problem). Your doctor may recommend this procedure for about 5 years after starting testosterone. It's important to remember that after your ovaries and uterus are removed, your body will not produce testosterone on its own and you are fully dependent on testosterone therapy. If you decide to stop hormone therapy for any reason, you will need to take estrogen and progesterone supplements to prevent osteoporosis.
     • Many men choose to have a hysterectomy to avoid having to go to a gynecological examination, because they are ashamed.
     • Some states / countries require genital mutilation before transgender people can legally change their sex.
   • Lower part surgery: shaping the male genitals. There are two types of surgery: small penis shaping or create a real penis.
     • At the same time, the surgeon will lengthen the urethra so that you can use the newly created penis to urinate. The vagina is also closed during this procedure, and the patient can choose to have a scrotum and insertion of the testicles.
   • Some health insurance policies refer to underlying surgery as cosmetic surgery, meaning the patient is responsible for this very expensive cost. The cost of surgery for the upper part is about 125-160 million VND, the cost of a hysterectomy is similar. Lower part surgery costs about 115-450 million VND, depending on which procedure you choose.

9. 

   Legal gender change. Again, each state / province / country has its own laws that everyone needs to comply with to change gender. Many places require proof of the true sex of a psychologist or doctor. The State of New York requires an endocrinologist to confirm that the person has been taking testosterone, as well as the surgeon to confirm having performed upper surgery and a hysterectomy. advertisement

Advice

• Be yourself. Do what feels comfortable, but always be aware of your safety.
• Sympathy for your friends and family, they need time to get used to the changes. You may have known and felt like a boy for a long time, but now they have learned this information. You should not show disrespect towards them, but be patient. Even though they have felt completely normal about who you are from the time of publication, they may need time to remember and familiarize themselves with male names, or to use new pronouns when mention you.
• Don't be in a hurry, especially when you're young. Perhaps you feel all of this happening immediately or feel unable to carry on with this female body. Be strong, patient, and make sure to make the right decision. Talk to people you know and trust, visit support groups (either live or online), and chat with other transgender people. These decisions will change your life, and many doctors even ask you to see a psychologist and live as a man for a while before they allow hormonal treatment or surgery. Some "previous generation" people have lived their whole lives preparing and letting society accept the transgender world. Some have paid a heavy price (addiction, self-isolation, suicide and even murder) but many have lived a happy life, whether they undergo surgery or not. Examine your options and don't isolate yourself. Transform in a way that works for you.
• Prepare well before making the issue public as friends and family will ask many questions. State why you are feeling this way, especially if you plan to talk to your doctor about hormone therapy and surgery. Give examples that have happened in your life to illustrate how you have felt over the years, and this is not your transient feeling or your flare-up decision. Find materials on transgender issues so you can discuss your next steps and proposed plans. Know the cost. Insurance may not cover hormone therapy or surgery, and family and friends may not be willing to give or lend money for treatment. Learn about financial planning, or meet with a financial planner to determine ways to build your treatment fund.
• No rush to reveal the new gender. Let people you trust when it feels right. Remind them that this is your personal personal issue, and you disclose that because you trust them, you don't want them to share that information with others - if you want others to know, then you will tell them yourself. to them when it feels right.
• Choose the right space to reveal to "important people" (like parents). Choose a neutral place that you feel comfortable with, where anyone can leave easily if needed. You shouldn't let them get stuck when they have strong feelings and need to find a quiet place to think deeply, and you also need to choose a place where you can leave quickly if the situation gets worse. or danger.
• Stand up and protect yourself if necessary. Even though you shouldn't be cruel to anyone, if they make fun of you as transgender, don't sit there and let them torment. Stand up and protect your true self! You will feel better because of doing so.

Warning

• Being open to others can be risky, especially for your family, even if you are no longer a minor and are no longer living with your family. Remember to choose a time when they are calm and not too stressed or angry. If you know that they are biased against transgender people and anticipate they may act violently upon hearing that information, be especially cautious when speaking. If you anticipate an act of violence you should seek the advice of people you trust first, and consider whether to share this information with them. Your safety is of utmost importance.
• Be wary of blind people and people who don't accept transgender people. Some people are simply rude, but others will be intimidating and dangerous.
• Never let anyone pressure you to take hormones or have surgery if you don't want to, just because they say you're not "real transgender" or "real man". Many transgender men live a very happy life and lead a real life without the use of hormones or surgery. Everyone has their own reasons for choosing or not choosing these medical solutions.Furthermore, surgery is a very expensive and personal option. Some people have no money to perform surgery, some react to anesthesia, and some are simply afraid of performing optional surgery because they are afraid of pain, complications, or anesthesia. The only people who really need to know what your body looks like are the doctor, your partner, and yourself.
• If you choose to have transsexual surgery, the results will be irreversible. Although they can lift breasts and reshape the vagina, there is no reconstruction procedure that can actually return your body to its original condition. Even the many side effects of testosterone therapy (beard growth, broad shoulders, enlarged clitoris, change in voice, etc.) can be permanent once treatment has stopped, however if you have ovaries. then the female fat and muscle characteristics will usually be restored. Sexual desires, oily skin, and body odor can be restored to their original state, but can also be perpetuated. Realize what you are doing and what you want. A psychologist can help you make this decision, but in the end it is still your decision. Do what you feel is right.