Content

• Steps
• Warning

Often times in life we ​​have to make some tough decisions. The decision to do something new often involves giving up on something else. That is what makes decisions difficult — you always face loss as well as uncertainty in the future. However, we often overestimate the importance of a few decisions that ultimately turn into happiness and a sense of well-being. By making the right mindset and reminding yourself that you rarely get stuck in making decisions, you'll find it easier to make decisions for yourself - even decisions. hard.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Helping Yourself Have the Right Mindset

1. 

   
   
   Write down what you are hesitant about. If you feel stuck and cannot make the difficult decisions, write down what is stopping you on a piece of paper. Ask yourself if you can't make a decision because you fear the consequences will come. If this is true, then remember that people often overestimate how certain upcoming decisions will strongly impact them. This is known as "emotional forecasting", and in general, people are not good at this.
   • That is, once you have the time to adapt, the decision you make will ultimately have less effect on overall well-being than you might think. Use this information to help you overcome your fears to make a decision in one way or another.

2. 

   
   
   Compare what you know to what you really should know. Think about both sides of the issue that are being threatened by your decision. For example, if you're thinking about getting a new job and one side attracts you with a raise, ask yourself if you know how your salary will be raised.
   • If you are short on information, explore this topic by going online and checking the average salary information (Google "average salary + X", where X is the title of potential job), asking colleagues. in the same field what they heard about salaries, and, when the right time is right, ask your new potential employer directly.
   • You can also gather information by asking people who have made similar decisions before, or who have been in similar situations. For example, if you know someone who already has a job you're interested in, ask them what experience they have. Make sure you compare and contrast their living situation with yours.
   • If they really like their new job and like to move to a new city, but because they're single, while you'll have to be away from your partner for a year or so, then how much do you prefer moving for work? the new work may actually no longer be relevant.

3. 

   
   
   See if others are stopping you. Sometimes we fear when we make decisions because we are afraid of what others will think of us. If you value your own happiness and see yourself as the ultimate driver of your life then remember that you are still the one making your own decisions in the end.
   • Before you act, ask yourself if you often worry about what others might think. If you answered yes, then chances are that someone else is holding you back, preventing you from making a decision.
   • If your fear of social dissent is holding you back, think about how you feel about the decision. That is, do your best to keep those who are in danger of judging your decision from your mind.

4. 

   Think in the end what your real decision is. Sometimes we hesitate when we make decisions because we think the decision cannot be left halfway. This is certainly true sometimes. Often, however, it is possible to completely or partially reverse the decision. Therefore, it is true that decision-making should not be like a great emotional burden.
   • Carefully consider your final decision. For example, ask yourself some of the following questions about relocating for a new job: Will you be able to live there forever or will you reapply for your old job or another job to return home. Have you lived? Would you apply for the same position in a new city if you ended up disliking your new location?

5. 

   Check for potential depression. It is difficult to decide when we feel down. Cognitive power is exhausting, and even small tasks or simple decisions can seem like enormous work.
   • Check to see if you are depressed, and ask yourself if you have been feeling down for a while. If you feel like this for a long time (longer than two weeks), or if you find that you no longer like some of the things you used to like, then your risk is depressed.Remember that the right way to get a proper diagnosis is to see a mental health professional.

6. 

   Rested. Sometimes we cannot identify all the reasons for the difficulty or come to a decision, and that is completely normal. Try taking a little rest and remember that your unconscious mind may still be active to solve the problem even if you are not aware of it.

7. 

   Stop believing in the perfect decision. Perfectionism creates an unrealistic view of the world, and can cause anxiety and frustration because you only keep to a standard that cannot be reached. Regardless of your decision or the environment, there are some tough things that you don't like to face. If you are torn about a decision because you are looking for the great choice to come along, remember that the perfect path doesn't seem to exist.
   • In order to achieve that, when you are struggling to make a decision remind yourself that no decision option is perfect, it is more likely that a few obstacles will arise when you make each decision. is important.

8. 

   Try to find alternatives. Making a good decision can be difficult because we are often drawn into a "either / or" situation. For example, if you are considering taking on a new job, the thought may flow down the line "I got a new job and I'm not completely satisfied. good I stay where I am and it has no prospects. ”However, if you have found an alternative, you will find you may not be limited to choosing either option. You may have other options, like finding a new job and continuing to look for a better position, or turning down the job and continuing to look for something better.
   • Some studies suggest that if you can add even one alternative, then you are more likely to make a better decision. This is probably because you are not thinking in limited conditions and cannot be flexible, so it makes you more open to many possibilities, otherwise you may not need to consider making a decision.
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Part 2 of 3: Consider both sides of the Decision

1. 

   Make a list of the pros and cons. Sometimes some tough decisions can make you feel overwhelmed and find it difficult to consider all the facts, pros and cons with a balance. To help keep you from feeling overwhelmed, write down a few very specific things.
   • Create a two-column table, one to list the pros (such as what will or can be good when you make your decision), and one that lists downsides (for example things that will or can go badly when you decide).

2. 

   Estimate the certainty of each of the pros and cons. Not all good or bad things when making a decision can happen equally. Consider this (exaggerated) example: if you have the opportunity to go to Hawaii but are afraid of a volcanic eruption, because the chances of this happening are so small you don't pay too much attention to it along the way. Give decision.
   • For example, if you make the decision whether to accept a new job, some of the things that can fall in the favorable column include: new environment, opportunities to make new friends, salary increases.
   • In the negative column you can mention: will have to move elsewhere, will be challenged to start a new job once you get used to the old job, the future will be less certain than now.

3. 

   Note the subjectivity of the pros and cons. Some people may find moving to a new city to be an advantage, while others prefer to stay in one place and dislike moving.
   • Remember, when you estimate the certainty of the list items, you may find it surprising. For example, you may find that moving to a new city is not necessarily the negative experience you once thought.
   • You can consider certainty in the following sections. For the list of pros, make sure you are in a new environment (100%)

4. 

   Consider the pros and cons. Evaluate how important each pros and cons are to you by looking at them on a scale of 0 to 1.
   • For example, if you think you are just a little bit excited about the new environment, you could rate the magnitude of that change at about 0.30.

5. 

   Value calculation. Increases the certainty of the number of changes in that importance to you in order to feel the 'worth' of things.
   • For example, because you will inevitably be living in a new environment when you change jobs, and you attribute the 'new environment' to a value of 0.30, you would multiply 0.30 (value) by 100 (certainty). ), to get the value 30. So your rating for staying in the new environment is + 30.
   • As another example, if the probability of making new friends is 60% but it is important that you expand your network of friends, you can rate it as if it is of 0.9 importance. So, multiplying 60 by 0.9 will yield 54. In this case, although it is not certain that you will make new friends at the new company, it is important that you pay more attention to making decision.
   • You then add 30 plus 54, and add the value of the other vantage points, to get the total value for the benefits.
   • You do the same for the downside.

6. 

   Be careful before making a decision. Creating a list of pros and cons is not always a good way to make a decision because it has a number of obstacles. Surely if you are choosing to make a decision this way, then you will not run into one of the drawbacks.
   • Make sure you don't analyze too many situations by creating 'pros' or 'disadvantages' that might, to outsiders, seem good or bad but in reality are not the things that are yourself care in one way or another.
   • Along with this idea, don't let go of a few hunches when you make a list like that. Sometimes a hunch is difficult to describe with words and so they don't get on the list; but that feeling is real and needs to be carefully considered and evaluated.

7. 

   Avoid receiving too much information. Sometimes having too much information can really limit your ability to make a decision. For example, an overly complex list of pros and cons that will make it difficult to keep track of all relevant changes and all the ways in which you evaluate them and all. complex they can interact. Being overwhelmed by real information only makes your decision worse.
   • Start by reviewing the list with 5 pros and 5 disadvantages. Especially when considering the importance, you probably don't need too many points to help yourself make a decision.

8. 

   Decide according to value. If the value of the favorable is greater than the negative, then you can choose to make a decision based on that. In that case, it seems better that you make a decision instead of doing nothing. advertisement

Part 3 of 3: Avoiding Some Common Mistakes

1. 

   Notice the right bias. This kind of prejudice is very common. It happens when you look for information to confirm what you already know (or think you know) about a situation. This can cause you to make a bad decision because you do not consider all the relevant information.
   • It helps to make a list of pros and cons, but only to a certain extent, because it's easy for you to take some information lightly. Consult with others about your thoughts and options to make sure you are looking at things. You don't need to make a decision based on their thoughts, but considering their point of view can help you fight against the right bias.

2. 

   Avoid making mistakes by gamblers. This bias occurs when you expect past events to influence or reproduce upcoming events.For example, if a coin is tossed "face up" 5 times in a round, you can start expecting it to be the next "face up", although the chance of each coin to be flipped is exactly 50. / 50. When making difficult decisions, be sure to consider some of your past experiences, but don't let them inappropriately affect your perception.
   • For example, if you are trying to decide whether to marry someone and when you have a failed marriage history, you risk allowing it to stop you. However, you should consider all the information here: are you different from what you were when you first got married? Will the current partner be different from the previous one? What is the nature of this relationship? These will help you make a more thoughtful decision.

3. 

   Observe the sinking cost fallacy. When making difficult decisions, you can be the bait for the cost-sinking excuses. This happens when you focus too much on what you have invested in a situation where you fail to control and then make a wiser decision to give up. According to economics, it is known as "don't throw money through the window".
   • For example, if you bet $ 100 on your poker while your opponent is still on the hand, it is difficult for you to realize that you are in danger of losing. You can raise your stake because you have put a lot of money in it, even though your hand is no longer the strongest.
   • As another example, you bought a few tickets to the musicals. On the night of the event, you feel tired and don't really want to go. But, since you already bought a ticket, you have to go any way. Because you are not well and don't want to go, you will have a bad time. This money is actually being spent regardless of whether you go to the theater or not, then the best decision is to just stay home and rest.
   • If you find yourself in favor of a decision because you've "invested" a lot of time, effort or money in it, take a step back to reconsider your decision. While it's not a bad idea to keep pursuing something, don't let the delusional trap lead you to a decision where you're not in the best interests of it.
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Warning

• Don't be in a hurry to make any important decisions. Carefully consider your options and postpone your decision until the next day after you've thought it through.