Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 3: Get reassured
• Method 2 of 3: Address doubts
• Method 3 of 3: Think more positively

You and your partner may have been over the moon with each other, but now doubts have arisen. You start to worry whether the two of you are a good match for each other. Is your partner interested in someone else? If you don't resolve the doubts about the relationship, they can ruin everything. Address your doubts by first consulting the source - your partner - and looking for the reassurance you crave.

To step

Method 1 of 3: Get reassured

1. Talk about your fears. Bottling up your feelings can actually make doubts proliferate. Let go of your doubts by talking to your partner about them. Be candid with him or her and share what's bothering you.
   • You could say, "We never have conversations about the future and it makes me worry about your feelings for me."
2. Ask your partner for reassurance. After sharing your concerns, ask your partner for support and reassurance. Maybe you want to be reminded of how much the other person loves you, or you want to receive a token of affection, such as a hug and a kiss.
   • You could ask something like, "I'd like to know if I'm the most important thing to you. Can you please tell me? "
   • Be careful about looking for too much reassurance, as it can make you look tacky to your partner.
3. Work together to come up with solutions. Identify what's going on with your partner's behavior that makes you doubt. Then collaborate and look for ways to work on it.
   • If you're in doubt because your partner keeps putting off important conversations about the future, talk about it candidly and find a middle ground.
   • When doubts arise after a bad argument, try relationship counseling and learning better conflict resolution skills.
   • Talk to each other about how much you enjoy sharing and receiving love. For example, some people like to do things for the person they love to show what they feel for that person, while others like to shower their partner with compliments and declarations of love. Since it is normal for every human to have a different "love language", it is important to know how you both show love so that there are no misunderstandings.
4. Prioritize time together. Doubt can creep in when couples experience the inevitable times when there is less time and affection for each other. Making more time for bonding and intimacy can help dispel those doubts.
   • Put the calendars side by side and indicate a few days or evenings a week that you make time for each other.
   • Make the most of your time together by turning off your phones and letting others know you don't want to be disturbed for a while.
5. Provide feedback on your partner's efforts. As your partner tries to change their behavior to make you feel more secure about the relationship, show appreciation for that progress. Indicate that you notice when you see the other person doing their best, by saying, "I noticed you made an attempt to call me back as soon as possible. Thank you dear'.
   • Express gratitude when your partner does something to make you feel reassured without you asking for it. For example: "I appreciate you texting me that you will be late." It reassured me that you would still make it and that I am important to you. "

Method 2 of 3: Address doubts

1. Place situations that lead to doubt in a different context. Notice the situations that tend to reinforce your doubts. Then challenge your thoughts about the situation by looking at them in a different way.
   • Suppose your doubt grows when your partner doesn't answer a call, put it in a different frame: your partner can be in a meeting or in the shower. A missed call does not necessarily mean that the other person is doing something that is not right.
2. Practice stopping a thought when concerns arise. Doubt can hinder your life and undermine your focus and productivity. Tell yourself to "stop" the train of thought and to distract yourself with an engaging activity.
   • Read a book, knit a sweater or go for a run.
3. Ask yourself if there is evidence to support strong doubts. If a particular doubt is constantly bothering you, it may be your instinct that signals "problems." Before taking any action, however, you must first find evidence.
   • Maybe your doubts have grown after seeing your partner flirting with someone else. Can you recall any other instances where you felt uncomfortable about your partner's "wandering eye"?
4. Decide if your doubts are straining the relationship. Any doubt in a relationship is perfectly normal, but if your doubts stem from frequent lying, cheating, manipulation, or unreliability when it comes to your partner, it could be a sign that you should leave the relationship.
   • Healthy relationships do not involve over-control, deceit, infidelity, or abuse.
   • Doubts can also be enough to make you leave a relationship if they arise from the fact that your partner doesn't support your values. If the other person can't or won't respect what's most important to you, then it may not be the best relationship for you.
5. Talk about your doubts with a therapist. If you're unsure about how to cope with your relationship doubts, talk to a relationship counselor. This professional can help you get to the heart of your doubts and determine if they are healthy or indicate a problem.
   • You can choose to go to a therapist on your own before going to a session with your partner.
   • Ask your doctor for a referral to a therapist.

Method 3 of 3: Think more positively

1. Identify what makes you valuable outside of your relationship. List all the reasons you are a great person that have nothing to do with being part of a couple.Maybe you are very smart, athletic, animal friendly, or a talented cook.
   • If your self-esteem is strongly linked to the health of your relationship, then you may experience doubt even during general challenges. You can combat this by building your self-esteem.
2. Use mindfulness to deal with insecurity. Feeling scared or insecure is no fun, but some doubts are normal and even healthy. Start with mindfulness to help you learn to embrace or at least accept the uncertainty in your relationship and your life.
   • When these feelings arise, notice them, but leave them alone. Take a deep breath through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Don't try to change thoughts or act on them. Just let them pass by.
   • Practice mindfulness daily and you will feel more in control and less troubled by these worrisome doubts.
3. Stay away from negative or critical people. The opinions of colleagues, friends and family can lead you to doubt your relationship. If someone has only negative things to say about your partner or your relationship, take a step back from that person.
   • Sometimes family provides well-meaning, but biased or self-serving advice. Before letting other people's perspective feed your doubts, think about how you feel about your partner and what you see in their behavior.
   • Be careful about seeking advice or discussing your relationship with people who are overly judgmental or critical. Choose people with an open mind and supportive counselors.
4. Use "will" and "should" less often. If your language is rigid about your relationship, you're more likely to try to fight the uncertainty. When you remove these terms from your parlance, you can feel more flexible and open about your relationship.
   • If you think, "He has to answer the phone when I call," you can involuntarily make yourself angry when your partner is just too busy to call back.
   • Don't think like, "She's going to be spending Saturday with someone else," just because your girlfriend hasn't made any plans for you.