Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 4: Fulfilling your obligations outside of prison
• Part 2 of 4: Get information about your prison
• Part 3 of 4: Behave well
• Part 4 of 4: Making your stay more bearable

Unlike the United States, where there are two different types of prisons depending on the length of the sentence, in Belgium and the Netherlands there is only one type of prison. In any case, it is possible to prepare yourself somewhat, so that you can make your situation a little easier. So before going to jail, try to learn as much as you can about where you'll be serving your sentence with other inmates. Think of yourself as an anthropologist trying to master the rules of a new society. If you can do this and keep your cool, your time in prison can be noticeably less stressful.

To step

Part 1 of 4: Fulfilling your obligations outside of prison

1. Talk to your employer. Whether you have to go to jail for a few days, a few weeks, or more, be honest with your employer. You shouldn't go into details - especially when the details are sensitive - but it is wrong to keep your employer and colleagues in the dark. They will need time to replace you in your absence.
2. Get your finances in order. Talk to the companies that issue you credit cards. Pause your cell phone plan so that you don't have to pay unnecessary costs while in prison. By not clearing these matters up in advance, you run the risk of having to pay significant debts once you are released. Many ex-convicts are as good as bankrupt when released because they did not deal with these matters beforehand.
   • In some countries, your bank may be able to provide some credit to cover your time in prison. This can be used for your mortgage, payments for your car and all kinds of other financial matters. Talk to your bank to see if they can do anything to make your transition in and out of prison easier.
3. Borrow money to put into your account. When you go to prison, you need a current account that you can use to buy basic things. Make sure you have some extra cash just to be sure. This will no doubt come in handy while you are stuck.
4. Have your attorney request that you review your case. If you have to go to prison for 12 months, your case can be reviewed after a few months. With good behavior, your lawyer may have a good chance of releasing you early.
5. Determine the custody rights if you have children. The rights of a convicted parent vary depending on the crime committed, the place of conviction and the prison where the sentence is being served. In general, custody is transferred from a parent to the closest relative (for your child). This means that when you are incarcerated, your partner has the best chance of taking over custody. After parents, custody can be temporarily given to aunts, uncles, sisters, brothers or grandparents. A judge and social services will be involved in this decision.
   • If your child does not have a family member who can take care of him or her, he or she will be placed in foster care for the duration of your sentence. This may differ depending on the crime you committed. Violent crimes can cause you to lose custody altogether - in which case your child can be given up for adoption. If you can work all of this out before going to jail, you will be in a much better position. Filling out petitions, talking to judges and following the rules can be challenging while behind bars.

Part 2 of 4: Get information about your prison

1. Learn how visitors work. Each prison has different rules regarding visits. Everyone can only receive visitors on certain days and times. Try to figure this out in advance so that you can schedule when you receive visitors. Try to have family members and friends come on different days. So you have something to look forward to.
   • Also try to find out what you can do during the visit. This can range from just talking to playing a board game. Certain prisons allow intimate visits. Check with your prison before you are locked up to find out what is and is not allowed.
2. Find out how money is used in prison. Most prisons keep it for you so you don't lose your money and it doesn't get stolen. It is important that you know how to withdraw your money. Most prisons have a special desk where you can spend your money on things you need.
   • Also try to find out how to put money in your account. Most prisons require a check, but sometimes it is also possible to deposit money online. This is a good option for family members who are not locked up. That's not how they should come to the office in the prison.
3. Find out exactly what "good behavior" means. Many prisons can shorten a prison sentence as a result of good behavior. Talk to your prison beforehand to see what they are specifically paying attention to. By simply asking about it, you can even end up on a good note with guards and staff members. Avoid drugs and violent / sex crimes.
   • Remember that prisons can be overcrowded, so early release based on good behavior is certainly possible. Some prisons will even cut your sentence by a third for good behavior.
4. Talk to your prison about general services. Education programs, work programs, and detoxification and medical options are available in most prisons. To make the most of your time, you need to be aware of what's on offer. Don't waste time while you are locked up. Use this time to learn, learn a profession, or quit drugs. Most services are free to use while serving your sentence.
   • Most prisons also have multi-religious chapels. These can be fantastic havens for you - both literally and figuratively - while you are stuck. Ask in advance if you can bring your own religious texts or knick-knacks. Some inmates claim it is an unwritten rule not to mess with religious people in prison.

Part 3 of 4: Behave well

1. Be yourself, but try not to attract attention. Don't get noticed. You are meant to be yourself because during your stay in prison you have to live with yourself. But this doesn't mean you should be the center of attention. Don't make too much noise. Do not shout when a small voice is sufficient. Do not try to pretend to be "tough" or someone else. The other inmates will find you unreal and find reasons to mess with you.
2. Be social, but don't "associate" with anyone. You are meant to build a reputation as an individual. Friends are important. Owing to friends, speaks to your disadvantage. When a fight breaks out, it is often because of associations or pressure such as by a gang. One person is "arguing" with someone else and both call in their friends to fight it out. If you are not part of this release of tension in prison, you will not be called to join the fight.
3. Let go of your tough attitude. Going in angry can cause problems with your new cellmates. Toughness often leads to hostilities. Don't make enemies because you are angry with yourself, someone else or the system. Don't try to be foul-mouthed. Insults usually lead to sour relationships. Try not to be surprised by inmates who lack self-confidence. A particular biting comment can make the difference between a nice mess and a painful beating.
4. Know how to answer the golden question. "Why are you sitting?" You have to answer vaguely and politely. You are not supposed to ignore questions. That will only make your cellmates push even more. The hardest thing about serving a sentence is boredom. New people mean new distractions. Do not increase their expectations or sense of mystery by refusing to answer a question. Just be vague.
   • Don't participate in tough talk. Some inmates will boast of their actions. Do not participate, especially if you have not been convicted of other crimes. The last thing you want is for someone to find a reason to hold you longer.
   • Don't disclose a crime that could get you in trouble. Even other prisoners will judge you based on your past. For example, it is not a good idea to say you have been convicted of a hate crime, child abuse, or any other crime that most people consider horrifying. Revealing this will likely make you more harassed as the inmates will feel they have the right to do so.
5. Do not touch other people or their belongings. If you bump into someone, you have to apologize and keep going. If your apology is not accepted, you can try again and leave immediately. Do not touch other people's belongings (books, pens, or clothing) without permission. This also applies to food. You will have very few personal belongings in prison. Most people guard their belongings more carefully when they are stuck.
   • This brings us to the unfortunate myth of prison rape. Rape is uncommon in prison. You will not be pushed into the showers to be abused. Sex with joint consent is much more common than forced sex. Serving a sentence is boring and lonely. Some men use sex to pass the time. The same men consider themselves straight outside the prison walls. Sexuality is a spectrum and prison is proof of it. If you're not interested, just make sure you're not sending signals that indicate interest.
6. Don't tell anyone. You've probably heard the saying "snitches get stitches". This is true and unfortunately a prison is run in such a way that it is very tempting to disclose. Guards will offer to treat you better, give you more rights to receive visitors, and provide protection in exchange for information about someone. You could agree to provide that information because you are not yet used to eating or because you miss your family very much. But when it becomes known that you are a snitch or that you are receiving special treatment from the guards, the other inmates are sure to find reasons to bother you.

Part 4 of 4: Making your stay more bearable

1. Eat. You don't get meals very often and minutes in prison feel like hours. Don't give away your food. This can be understood as favoritism. The food you eat will be worse than anything you have eaten before, but now is not a time to be picky. Put some money aside and buy Ramen noodles at the counter.
2. Stay in shape. If your prison has fitness equipment, you should use it. You only have time. Many prisons, especially in the US, are out of exercise equipment these days. Rumor has it that the inmates became too strong for the guards. But its absence is probably best explained by the costs associated with purchasing and maintaining fitness equipment. Either way, you can always train. Do push-ups, lunges, sit-ups and other exercises in your cell. Go jogging / running on the sports field. A healthy body leads to a healthy attitude, which can make your stay more bearable.
3. Read a lot. Reading is the easiest and cheapest form of entertainment you have in prison. A TV may be available, but inmates rarely come to a consensus on what will be watched, so most just read. In prison you have more than enough time to kill. Choose uplifting, interesting, or informative books. The best are books that make you feel better and immerse you in them. Maybe try The Count of Monte-Cristo of Dumas.
4. Maintain relationships with the outside world. Call and write to your friends and family regularly. It will make you feel connected to the outside world. Phone calls can be made in different ways depending on your location. Some prisons require calling cards that you can buy at the counter. The same goes for stamps. Just know that all communications inside and outside the prison are controlled. Do not call to tell loved ones where the body or money is buried - neither literally nor figuratively.
5. Communicate with your attorney. Depending on your lawsuit, your attorney may require information from you. In order for him to work on your behalf, you must cooperate with him as best you can. Talking to your attorney about your lawsuit and your time in custody can also be a great way to while away the time. It can offer hope when you get good news, but at least you stay informed. Often lawyers can help with other things than just matters related to your sentence. Matters such as custody of the children or paying bills can often be arranged through your lawyer.