Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 3: Think realistic about death
• Method 2 of 3: Dealing with the fear of loss
• Method 3 of 3: Strengthen social support
• Tips
• Warnings

Losing a loved one is difficult no matter what the circumstances. Recovering from the fear of losing a loved one is a very personal experience. Fortunately, there are research-based techniques that can help you think realistically about death, deal with the fear of losing someone, and receive social support.

To step

Method 1 of 3: Think realistic about death

1. Realize that fear of death is very normal. Most people fear at some point in their lives that someone they love will die. In addition, most people will experience the loss of a loved one once in their lifetime. According to fear management theory, thinking about the death of a loved one can bring on paralyzing fear. Thinking about someone's death also emphasizes our own mortality.
   • Know that you are not alone. Other people can empathize with your situation because they have likely faced a similar situation themselves. If you don't mind, you can share your feelings with others who have faced the loss of someone, which can help you feel supported and taken seriously.
   • Take your own fears and feelings seriously. Tell yourself it's okay to feel anxious or sad. These are normal reactions to the situation.
2. Focus on what you can control. Taking care of a loved one who is sick can create additional fear, distress, burden, and loss of independence. While you can certainly do your best to help your loved one, you may not be able to control the time left for your loved one. Rather, focus on what you can do today, such as spending time with him or her or dealing with your fears and grief in a healthy way.
   • Think about everything you can control about the situation. For example, you have control over your own behavior - what you choose to do about the situation. You can focus on pleasing and caring for your loved one. You can also focus on reassuring yourself and expressing your own emotions regarding loved ones in order to process your grief.
   • Let go of what you have no control over. Visualizing and imagining can help us gain an impression of what we can and cannot control. Imagine placing your fears on leaves floating on a river. Watch them as they drift away.
   • Set your limits. Caring for a loved one who is sick can bring a variety of additional challenges, including boundaries being crossed, fear and depression. Only do what you can do, and make time to take care of yourself. You may need to set boundaries with other people and make time to take care of yourself. The boundaries are for securing this time for yourself.
   • Use mindfulness to pay attention to the here and now. We fear because we think about the future and what could happen, instead of focusing on the here and now and what to do with this moment. Take control of what is happening now (which is what you do by reading this)!
3. Accept your loss. Studies have shown that when people are more accepting of everything that generally involves dying, they find it easier to deal with loss and are more resilient overall.
   • You can begin this acceptance by listing all the difficult emotions and thoughts that go hand in hand with the fear of losing a loved one. Write down your most intimate thoughts and fears and accept them all. You can say to yourself, "I accept my fears and pain. I accept that one day I may lose this person. This will be difficult, but I accept that loss is part of life. "
   • Remind yourself that death is part of life. Sadly, loss is something that almost everyone has to deal with in their life.
4. Think positively about the world. When people believe the world is fair and just, they are more resilient and find it less difficult to deal with the loss of a loved one.
   • One way to think positively about the world is to recognize the life cycle, and that both life and death are natural. For life to be possible, there must also be death. Try to see the beauty of both life and death. The life cycle is an amazing thing that we can learn to appreciate and be grateful for. When one person dies, another can live.
   • Practice your gratitude. Say something to yourself like, "I may lose someone I love at some point, but at least I still have time to spend with him." I focus on that and am grateful for the time I have. I am very grateful for the time I can spend with him. "We can also choose to be grateful that we all, including our loved ones, have the opportunity to experience life.
   • If your loved one is in pain, you can focus on the thought that after death, the suffering is over for them. You can focus on the fact that regardless of his (or your) beliefs, he will rest in peace.

Method 2 of 3: Dealing with the fear of loss

1. Make use of your available resources to deal with it. Having inadequate resources prior to loss is associated with increased problems and chronic grief after the death of a loved one. So it is crucial to use coping mechanisms when you are afraid of losing someone.
   • People usually have certain ways of dealing with certain emotions, such as fear, loss, grief, and depression. Some examples of positive ways of coping with fear of losing someone are exercise, writing, art, getting out into nature, spiritual / religious behavior (such as prayer), and music.
   • Handle your feelings appropriately; allow yourself to feel them and let them out if you need to. Being more depressed (prior to the death of a loved one) may indicate that there may be a better adjustment to the loss once it has occurred. Crying can be healthy and is a normal release of pent-up grief and fear.
   • Keep a journal about what you fear. Write down your thoughts and feelings about losing your loved one.
2. Take a deep breath. If you find yourself panicking or experiencing extreme anxiety at the thought of losing a loved one, deep breathing exercises can help reduce your physiological responses (heavy breathing, accelerated heart rate, etc.) and leave you feeling calm. to give.
   • Sit or lie down in a comfortable position in a comfortable position. Inhale deeply and slowly through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Just focus on your breathing pattern. Pay attention to your abdomen / diaphragm as it retracts and expands as you breathe.
3. Strengthen your self-esteem and independence. Having a lot of self-esteem is a protective factor against difficulties related to death. Relationship problems, such as conflict and over-dependence on others, can result in individuals becoming more vulnerable to chronic grief after the death of a loved one.
   • Be more independent and make plans for an independent life.
   • Trust that it will get easier and you will be able to deal with it.
4. Create meaning and purpose. Believing that the world has meaning (meaning) helps people deal with the reality of death, and can help you lessen your fear of losing a loved one. Having a purpose in life means that you live for a reason (such as for your family, a profession, to help the world, to give back to society, etc.) instead of just existing or to survive. If you have one goal or several goals in your life, you can focus on what you want to achieve and you can continue to do so should your loved one pass away. This gives you the assurance that you have something to live for when your loved one is gone.
   • Do not forget that you are a valuable member of society. Focus on what you contribute to the world. Do you help others? Are you friendly with strangers? Do you donate to charity, or are you a volunteer? Recognizing these attributes can help you realize that you have a purpose, and that you can move forward with that goal despite the loss of your loved one. You can even dedicate certain activities or projects to your loved one in the future.
   • Try to find meaning in death. An example of giving meaning to death is that death is necessary for life, or that death is simply a gateway to another dimension or reality (such as belief in an afterlife). What does death mean to you? Do you think your loved one lives in the afterlife? Will your loved one live on in the memories of his loved ones? Or is it his contribution to the society in which he lives on?
5. Seek contact with a higher power. A higher power can be anything greater and more powerful than yourself. Having a connection or thinking about your religious, spiritual beliefs or worldview helps people deal with themes related to death.
   • If you are not religious or do not believe in a divine maker, then you can focus on a higher power such as nature (the moon and the ocean are very powerful). A higher power can also be a group of people (because groups can be more powerful than a person).
   • Write a letter to your higher power expressing your fears about losing your loved one.
   • Pray to your higher power over your feelings and thoughts. Ask for the outcome you desire (such as for your loved one to recover or not have to lead, etc.)

Method 3 of 3: Strengthen social support

1. Cherish the time you have with your loved one. If your loved one is still alive, make sure you spend time with them during whatever time you have left together.
   • Talk to your loved one about shared memories as well as what you value about them.
   • Make sure you emphasize what you feel for the other person. Tell the other person you love them.
   • These last conversations in someone's life can be very tough, but it's important to make sure you can convey what you want to the other person so that you're not left with regrets. You can try to write down what you want to tell your loved one before telling it in person.
2. Talk to a family member. Families who continue to support each other during the death of someone are better at enduring difficult emotions related to that death.
   • If you feel the need to talk to a family member or friend, ask. Chances are, you're not the only person who could use some comfort.
   • Surround yourself with family members and create unity by talking about shared memories or doing something together.
3. Confide in other people you can rely on. Not only does contact with family help reduce the fear of losing a loved one, but relationships outside the family are also helpful in enhancing one's ability to deal positively with the expectation of death. Discussing your feelings and thoughts with others helps to reduce fear and anxiety.
   • If you are religious or spiritual, talk to your religion's pastors to find comfort and help you find appropriate prayers.
4. Offer your support to others. Not only do we need social support when we are concerned about someone's passing, but supporting others is also a great way to feel better.
   • Talk to your children about death. If you have children, make sure you set aside special time to talk about the topic of death. Most public libraries do have children's books to help you and your kids on the topic in a friendly way.
5. Keep the relationship alive. One of the biggest fears people have when thinking about the death of a loved one is that the relationship will end. However, a relationship with a deceased person lives on in your memories, your prayers, your feelings and thoughts about that person.
   • Focus on the fact that your relationship and connection with this person can never die.

Tips

• Likewise, if you want some distraction from recent events, watching something like a comedy, connecting with friends who have nothing to do with the loss, etc. feel free to give in from time to time. .
• If you feel like you want to cry, do it. It is a human, biological response and something you have to take advantage of if you need it.

Warnings

• While this is a very personal time in your life, and so are the people around you, others may not share your need to cry or laugh. If so, find a place where you can be alone or away from other mourners in order to live your personal experience.