Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 2: Prepare to Get Your Girlfriend Back
• Part 2 of 2: Start chatting with your ex
• Tips

Parting is a difficult and unpleasant process, but in some situations it is brightened up by the realization that the ex-girlfriend is bored and wants to return everything. You should start rebuilding your relationship with your ex-girlfriend right after you split up. The fact is that your every action, any of your actions can both help and hinder the kindling of feelings. Taking some time to think about your feelings, work on yourself and work out a strategy for your next actions in relation to your ex will help you return to your old relationship.

Steps

Part 1 of 2: Prepare to Get Your Girlfriend Back

1. 1 Try to stick to the no-talk rule. Decide on a period of time during which you will not be in contact with your ex. Communication includes not only personal meetings, but also telephone conversations, SMS, and messages on social networks. Do not start the conversation yourself or respond to her attempts to contact you. This way, both of you will have the opportunity to be alone with yourself, to recover from this relationship, and to reflect on your feelings.
   • The withdrawal period is usually approximately 21, 30 or 45 days. Whichever of these options you choose, you must adhere to this strategy of behavior.
   • The lack of communication will give both of you the opportunity to recover from the relationship, and the free time that appears will most likely make your ex-girlfriend miss you.
   • If the breakup was difficult, this period will give you the opportunity to cool down a little and calm down negative feelings.
2. 2 Stop stalking her on social media. Even if you no longer communicate with your ex, constant monitoring of her life on social networks (viewing photos and publications) will provoke you to want to communicate with her. If you constantly follow her life on social media, it will be much more difficult for you to behave correctly. In addition, you may accidentally find out information that you did not want to know at all (for example, that she is already dating someone else).
   • If for this you have to remove your ex-girlfriend from friends on social networks, unsubscribe from her or block her profile - do so. But your ex-girlfriend shouldn't be aware that you have taken such measures.
   • Also, of course, you shouldn't post about how bored you are, how bad and lonely you are due to the breakup.
3. 3 Appreciate this relationship. Now that you've ended your relationship with your ex-girlfriend for a while, you have the opportunity to think it over and appreciate it. Think about the good and bad moments of this relationship - weigh the pros and cons. Remember what right and wrong things you have done. Be sure to think about whether you would like to act differently (and how exactly) if you had a chance to “replay” this or that situation.
   • It would be helpful to take a piece of paper and write down all the pros and cons. This list will help you evaluate your relationship objectively.
4. 4 Take care of yourself and work on yourself. You want to be the best version of yourself. Plus, it will definitely make you more attractive to your ex when you see her again. Try to eat right, exercise. Spend as much time as possible with family and friends - the people who love you.Do something fun, make time for activities you didn't have enough time for when you were in a relationship: volunteer, play video games, read books, and so on.
   • If you do not really want to communicate and go somewhere, this is also normal. Do what you think will help you recover from the relationship. Meditate, keep a journal, just spend time alone with yourself watching movies.
   • If, while in a relationship, you have encountered unpleasant aspects of your character (for example, if you notice excessive anger, jealousy, self-doubt, the habit of taking the other person for granted, the habit of controlling him) - start working on these negative qualities. If you need professional help, do not hesitate to contact a psychologist.
   • Describe in detail what kind of person you want to be, and then start working on yourself and on each item described.
5. 5 Try not to think badly about your ex. After parting, there is always a temptation to denigrate the ex-partner in the eyes of others. But remember that you can say something that, in fact, did not mean at all. Plus, speaking negatively about your ex (especially when talking to her family, her, or your friends) will not resolve the situation. If your ex finds out what bad things you say about her, it will likely ruin your chances of dating her again.
   • Try your best not to expand on the details of your relationship.
   • Don't post or post about your relationship on social media. Posts and publications also include those records that are associated with your relationship: lyrics, quotes.

Part 2 of 2: Start chatting with your ex

1. 1 Contact her. Once the period of silence is over, try contacting your ex. You can write her an email, call her, send a letter or note, or write a message. If you decide to write her a letter (or email), write that you thought about this breakup for a long time, that you put up with it, ask for forgiveness for everything you did wrong in the relationship, and tell us something interesting that happened in your life after breaking up.
   • If you decide to send the girl a message, write something to just start a conversation. It should be something that hints at light flirting and does not cause any negative associations.
   • For example, you can write: “Hi, I was watching“ X-Men ”on TV and I thought about you :)”. You can also remind in the message of the good moments that you had together. For example: "I remember how we went to that amazing restaurant ..."
   • When you first talk, you don't need to mention that you want to return the relationship, that you love her, and so on.
2. 2 Admit your mistakes and ask for forgiveness. You've had time to reflect on this relationship. Now it's time to admit your mistakes and apologize for them. This way, you show the girl that you are an adult and a mature person, that you really spent a lot of time thinking about your relationship with her. Plus, your ex will see that you are taking steps to become a good person.
   • This can be done either in person or by phone. But, in fact, long emotional conversations are clearly not suitable for SMS.
3. 3 Ask your girl out on a date. After you and your ex-girlfriend start talking again, invite her to go on a date with you. When inviting her somewhere, try to be as polite and friendly as possible. But this invitation should sound natural and simple, don't make it something special. Just say, "Hey, can we go get some coffee?" - or: "Let's go somewhere together." In addition, the word “date” can be replaced with the simpler phrase “let's spend time together”.
   • If the girl starts to refuse, say: "Hey, this is just coffee, what could go wrong?"
   • If your ex doesn't want to go anywhere with you anyway, don't push her. Give her space. Say, “I respect your decision to decline my invitation. But if you change your mind, call. I will be glad to see you. "
4. 4 Start caring for her again. To get your ex-girlfriend back, you need to do exactly the same things that you did for her in the early stages of your relationship with her, trying to interest her. If you previously gave her flowers or wrote cute postcards - start again to please the girl with these little things. Think of this opportunity as a new relationship. You need to achieve it again.
   • Sure, you want to impress her again, but don't try to beg and beg her to give you another chance. This behavior will only demonstrate your weakness and self-doubt. You want your ex to come back to you just because you are a cool guy, not out of guilt and pity for you.
   • Do not say banal phrases like: "I cannot live without you."
5. 5 Don't stir up the past. You and this girl are trying to start all over again. So focus on the positive things that made it all start for the first time. If this is the first time you've managed to win her attention with your sense of humor, try making her laugh again. If she liked the way you cook, cook something delicious for her.
   • Concentrate on creating new shared experiences with your girlfriend. She must see that things change over time.
6. 6 Do not hurry. Remember that if you agree, it does not mean that you can start from the point where it all ended. Treat this relationship as if it were new. Take your time - try to get to know each other better again. But also keep in mind that you shouldn't pressure the girl to get back in touch with her as soon as possible. In this case, it is better to focus on building strong friendships.
   • Don't text or call her every day.
   • Take her out on dates and try to come up with interesting activities. Find out what she likes and dislikes, learn more about her habits - just like the first time.
   • Take your time to get close to the girl physically, pay more attention to romance and cute conversations.
7. 7 If it's time to give up, do it. If your ex-girlfriend resists any of your attempts to get closer or at least return communication with her, treat her decision with understanding and respect. If a girl asks you to leave her alone, if she says that she decided to move on, you also need to start moving on, but without her. If you insist or plead, you will lose honor and dignity in her eyes, ruining the chance to return the relationship sometime in the future.
   • If your ex-girlfriend has a new boyfriend, take the news with dignity. Don't try to ruin her relationship with a new partner. Be patient and see if this is really a serious relationship or just a distraction.

Tips

• Breaking up is a very difficult and sad process, but don't give up. Talk to the girl. If she doesn't want to renew the relationship, accept this fact and move on.
• Be patient. It may take longer than you bargained to get the relationship back.
• You need to make the girl decide that it is her idea to renew the relationship. To do this, you need to become the man of her dreams.
• Even if you weren't able to get back in touch with your ex, remember that things will get better over time.