Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Think Logically
• Part 2 of 3: Be Honest
• Part 3 of 3: Think About Solutions
• Tips

Every day you have more and more opportunities, now it is not so easy to understand what you want. Sometimes this is completely clear, and sometimes you cannot figure out what you are missing. It is difficult to understand what exactly you want, and not your friends and family. To do this, you need to analyze yourself a little. Understand what you want and you will definitely become happier!

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Think Logically

1. 1 First, separate the two concepts: "Must" and "want". We all have acquaintances and friends who think they know what we really want. We are constantly told: “you have to wash the dishes”, “you have to go to college”, “you have to get married”. But all these things are not what you really want. If you do have to do this, you are wasting your energy and time. It is necessary to get rid of the concept of "should" for a while.
   • For most of us, it is not so easy to determine what is truly desirable for us and what we just need to do.
2. 2 Think about what you would do if you weren't afraid. Most people have abstract fears. For example, we are afraid of not being liked by people, afraid of being alone, in poverty, afraid of not finding friends, work, and so on. To understand what you really want, forget all your fears for a second.
   • If you were rich, independent, respected - what would you do? Everything that appears in your head when you imagine this is what you want.
3. 3 Think about what you don't like. More often than not, we know what we are unhappy with, but we do not know how to improve it. When you suddenly feel angry and dissatisfied, figure out what the reason is. Find out why you are upset about what went wrong. This will help mend the situation.
   • For example, your job. Are you unhappy at the moment? It is possible that you hate your job, like most people do. But how can the situation be changed? How can you change your attitude towards what is happening?
4. 4 List your priorities. Divide this list into categories, for example: family, friends, relationships, career, emotional, physical, and so on. Write 3 items in each category.
   • Now consider several options for what you want. Which options match your priorities the most? This is most likely the best way for you, because your desires will align with your true values.

Part 2 of 3: Be Honest

1. 1 Reschedule this case until tomorrow. If you are now in a bad or too happy mood, you will not be able to adequately analyze yourself. And if you don't know what you want, you are unlikely to achieve it. If you figure this out tomorrow, you can figure out what you would like to be in 2, 5, or 10 years. Whatever the goal, you must strive for it.
   • When you catch yourself thinking that you would spend all your money just to buy this cool car, stop! What you think about is your future orientation! Do you want to buy this car? If so, then this is what you really want.
2. 2 Be honest with yourself. Think about what prevents you from understanding what you want? Maybe you don't know yourself well? Sometimes, due to some circumstances, we do not allow ourselves to desire something. Opportunities will open up when we stop deceiving ourselves. Once that happens, you can figure out what you really want.
   • Here's an example: let's say you are a member of a club in your university. On Wednesdays, you wear special clothes, sometimes you make fun of the inhibited girls, sometimes you throw parties. You yourself have created your popularity, beauty, prestige, and that's good. However, if you want to be a scientist, this lifestyle is unlikely to help you with it. You must be honest with yourself in your desires.
3. 3 Don't listen to the voice of reason for even a few minutes! Forget all those "shoulds" that are told to you day in and day out. Usually, all these principles come either because of their own thoughts, or because of other people's opinions. You must not allow others to manipulate you. Try also from time to time to "turn off" your mind, which does not allow you to relax.
   • Think about the things that you think will be useful to you. You are not eager to eat sausage sandwiches for lunch, but sometimes you do. You don't want to write this test, but you have to. Get rid of these thoughts for a second and forget about the motives of any actions that are unpleasant to you.
   • If we lived in a world without consequences, we could do whatever we want. But in our world you need to think about the consequences and you need to think about where you are spending your time. What could you change? What would you do differently in your life?
4. 4 Create your own ideas! In the previous step, we mentioned those desires that arose more likely because of the opinions of others, and not because of your own aspirations. The world is small, and someone else's opinion always somehow affects us and our perception of the world, but try not to succumb to public opinion, instead create your own ideas and have your own opinion. Only you are the author of your life.
   • Think about your definition of success. Your definition is not something that your parents tell you from childhood. This is your own experience, your own thoughts. Think about what decisions you would make if you always followed your definition of success?
   • Forget about prestige! It's hard, but try it.Forget about your status and position, about everything that concerns someone else's opinion. If other people didn't influence you, how would things change? How would you be? Would you like what you usually do?

Part 3 of 3: Think About Solutions

1. 1 Know that everything that happens to you is the result of your thoughts. Your life has its own value, every experience is something useful. Do not miss a single opportunity, try to find your own. Your path is the one you are already walking.
   • It’s hard to know which path is right for you when you’re not feeling very happy. But understand that everything in life changes. Whether it's an activity or just an emotion - it will never last forever. You may be in trouble right now, but that does not mean that you have chosen the wrong path. You probably just need to do something to fix the situation.
2. 2 Relax. Relax and reassure yourself that everything will be fine. Life is always a series of good and bad moments. If you take all events to heart, your life will pass by, and you will hardly be able to use all the opportunities that you have. This is the worst thing you can do!
   • Moreover, sometimes your feelings can be masked by anger or other negative feelings. Try meditation, yoga. Or just rest, sit quietly and breathe deeply. When your emotions subside a little, you can think more clearly.
3. 3 Let this awareness come to you on its own. As soon as you can relax, you will immediately know that everything is going fine, and one day everything will surely fall into place. Ever heard that a relationship comes exactly when you least expect it? The same goes for desires. If you relax and think it over carefully, you will agree with this idea.
   • Who knows? Maybe exactly what you need was always with you, but you just did not notice? Relax and take a good look around!
4. 4 Understand that there will never be "that very moment." Remember this old phrase? “Why did the old man ask the child what she wants to do in life when she grows up? "Because he was looking for ideas." You have the same! You have to make decisions now, do not wait for the perfect moment, because it will never come! Don't be afraid to wish! Desires drive our lives.
   • In other words, take your time! You must understand your life, understand what you want to do, what brings you pleasure. You can be happy if you like.

Tips

• Keep a personal journal to help you understand your thoughts.