Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Discuss the issue with your husband
• Method 2 of 3: Prepare the soil
• Method 3 of 3: Don't pressure your husband

The decision to have a baby is a wonderful and exciting moment for every couple. But if you are already ready, and your husband is not yet, then even in a successful marriage, problems can arise. Before using guilt or coercion as a tool to achieve your goal, try to convince him to avoid conflict.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Discuss the issue with your husband

1. 1 Think back to your previous conversations about children. Before a new conversation, you should recall your previous conversations on this topic. They could contain important information.
   • Before the wedding, does your husband tell you that he wants children? Or that he doesn't want them? If he said that he wants to have children, remind him of this. If he mentioned that he does not want to have children, tell him that you assumed that he would change his mind after a few years of marriage.
2. 2 Set aside time to talk every week. If you want to convince your husband to have a baby, set aside a certain amount of time each week. This approach has several advantages for both parties.
   • Before the next conversation, both parties will have the opportunity to think things over and collect their thoughts. You might even write down important thoughts, arguments, or good reasons for trying to convince your husband.
   • Taking a break between conversations will help you control your emotions and contain your anger. So it will be easier to think logically, calmly bring reasonable arguments, and not flare up and not get angry, thereby only further pushing the husband away from the thought of children.
   • Scheduling the conversation at a specific time will make it easier for you to refrain from harassing your husband every day. If you press on it daily, you can get the exact opposite result.
3. 3 Talk to your husband about his concerns. If your husband is not sure if you should have a baby, ask what exactly he fears. Find out the reasons for the doubts. His fears may well be justified (eg financial problems). Talk to your husband and find out what he is afraid of.
   • Listen carefully to the answers. As much as you want to have a child, your spouse's feelings are just as important as yours. You don't need to dismiss his arguments just because you want a child.
   • If you are confident that you are ready to become parents despite the fears of your husband, discuss it with him. Suggest your options for solving current problems.
4. 4 Hear why your husband doesn't want children. Remember to listen to your husband as you discuss. Of course, it is very difficult to listen to the opposite of your wishes, but partners are of equal importance. Your husband is your significant other and deserves to be listened to.
   • Ask why he doesn't want to have children. Don't argue or interrupt, just listen to his arguments from start to finish.
   • Be polite to each other when discussing your desires and feelings. Show respect and do not judge your husband's views.
   • It is difficult to remain calm when emotions and desire to become a mother take over. It's okay if you get upset and cry. Take a few deep breaths. If you are angry and need to calm down, try going outside and walking a little.
5. 5 Share your concerns. Tell your husband about your concerns and fears about the child. There are always doubts and fears, even if you really want to have a baby. Tell your husband about them so that he calms down and does not think that he is alone in his fears.
   • If you are worried that your child will change your family, your relationship with older children, or your financial situation, tell your husband about it.
   • Discuss other possible changes in your marriage, including your marital relationship.
6. 6 Consider the financial aspects. Show your husband that both of you will be successful in having a baby. Finances are one aspect that can hinder family expansion. As you bring up the topic of a child, convince your husband that your financial situation is not a hindrance.
   • Explain that you have calculated the savings and annual income you have and have adjusted your planned spending.
   • Discuss your work situation. Talk about the fact that you and your husband are in good positions and that your child will not interfere with your career development.
7. 7 Mention the biological clock. Unlike men, women are only fertile for a limited amount of time. The exact timing is individual. Explain to your husband that timing also needs to be considered.
   • Tell your husband how you feel about your age and body clock. Do you consider yourself too old? Think there are only a limited number of years left for pregnancy?
   • Discuss the difficulties that can arise when trying to get pregnant and the time you may need to conceive.

Method 2 of 3: Prepare the soil

1. 1 Mention the unborn child during activities that your husband enjoys. Most men dream of teaching their child their favorite sport. Others dream of how they will fish, hunt or fix a car with their child. Use your husband's interests to your advantage.Do not forget to mention future children in those moments when he is busy with what he loves so that the husband can imagine how he will share his knowledge and skills with the child.
   • For example, if your husband loves football, watch the match with him. During the game, tell me how great it would be to teach your child how to play football, buy him a uniform from your favorite club, or go to the stadium together.
2. 2 Talk about prospects. If you want a child, talk to your husband about exciting prospects. Tell us what you expect from the birth of a child. Share your thoughts on what your family and child will be like.
   • Ask your husband: Doesn't he want to teach a child to drive or watch him learn to walk?
   • Remind me how great it is to hear the word “daddy” from a child for the first time. Ask if the husband wants a father's daughter or a son who will inherit his last name.
3. 3 Be patient. If your husband is in doubt, let him think it over. A child is a very serious decision, even if you already have children. People make important life decisions at different rates. Perhaps you are ready now, and your husband will be ready in the future. When talking about the unborn child, show support and be understanding with your husband's feelings.
   • If you love your husband regardless of his decision, be sure to say so.
   • If you want to put forward an ultimatum and are ready to disperse in case of refusal, it is better to contact a family psychologist.

Method 3 of 3: Don't pressure your husband

1. 1 Don't intentionally give up birth control. Even if you want to become a mother against your husband's wishes, never give up birth control to "accidentally" become pregnant. This behavior will create many problems in the relationship and can only strengthen the husband's decision not to have children.
   • If you cheat on your husband about contraception or try to manipulate, you will have trust issues. Getting pregnant is not worth destroying a marriage.
2. 2 Don't talk about children all the time. If you want to have a child, then discuss it with your husband, but do not return to this topic every ten minutes. If you constantly nag your husband, then he will only assert his unwillingness.
   • If your husband is not ready, leave him alone for a while and come back to the question later.
3. 3 Enjoy the family life you have now. Coercion will not make anyone happy. If your desire to have a baby turns into an obsession, your husband may build up irritation, and the pressure will only convince him otherwise. Instead, focus on what your family is doing at the moment.
   • If you have a good and strong family, then over time, the husband himself may want to replenish.
   • If you already have a child, then rejoice in it with your husband. Perhaps he will soon decide for himself that he wants another child.
   • If you don't have children yet, a strong marriage and a sense of happiness can influence a husband's decision to have children in the future.