Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: How to Softly Tell the Truth
• Part 2 of 3: Breaking Bad News Differently
• Part 3 of 3: What not to do
• Tips
• Warnings

It's not easy to admit to a girl that you don't like her. Perhaps she is a close friend of yours and has romantic feelings for you that you are not ready to reciprocate. Or you barely know each other and do not want to offend the girl. Either way, both of you will be better off if you tell the girl gently but honestly that you don't like her.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: How to Softly Tell the Truth

1. 1 Choose the right time and place. If you have come to a definite decision, then you need to act quickly. Try to choose the right time and place so as not to hurt the girl too much. It's not good if you catch the girl by surprise and pull her aside when she talks to her friends, or tell her the news when she prepares for the test.Try to choose a secluded place and a time when the girl will not be busy with important things or stress.
   • Of course, the perfect moment may never come. It is enough to choose more or less suitable circumstances. Make sure that there are no prying ears nearby and that the girl is in a normal mood.
2. 2 Say something nice first, but don't give the girl false hope. Of course, you don't need to say that she is the most beautiful girl in the world, but try to soften the news that follows. Say, “You are a wonderful person,” or “It’s always a pleasure for me to talk to you,” to show that you are kind, but not romantic. Think carefully about your words in advance so that there are no unnecessary meanings in them.
   • Keep your distance when you speak so that the girl does not misunderstand you. You should use closed body language and turn slightly to the side. Demonstrate that you are not looking for intimacy.
   • Try to maintain eye contact to show respect, but don't stare at the girl or she will get you wrong.
3. 3 Tell the truth. This is a tricky moment, so it's best not to delay. Do not hesitate, otherwise the girl may get confused and even think that you want to ask her out on a date. It is necessary to communicate the truth so as not to hurt the girl's feelings too much. Explain that you are talking about this because you want to be honest with her and don’t want to hurt her. Take a deep breath and confess.
   • Say something like, “I know you like me. Alas, but I do not experience reciprocal feelings. I have a lot of respect for you, so I'm talking about it. I don’t want you to learn everything from others. ”
4. 4 Listen to the girl's response. We'll have to endure. Surely after what has been said, you will have a desire to get away as soon as possible in order to avoid embarrassment. Understand that the girl is likely to be overwhelmed, so show respect and don't leave right away. If she wants to say something in return, let her do it, but do not turn the conversation into a scandal and do not go into a raised tone.
   • Try saying, “I'm sorry it happened,” but you don't have to go into an apology. After all, a person cannot influence their romantic feelings.
   • If the girl starts crying, try to calm her down, but do not drag out the conversation. Don't give false hopes.
5. 5 Let me know if you want to stay friends. Speak the truth. If you barely know each other and do not want to continue to communicate at all, then put an end to the conversation. If you are in a friendly relationship or the girl is interesting to you as a person, offer to become or remain friends. Of course, she may roll her eyes or in the heat of the moment refuse such a prospect, since people often say such words just for the sake of decency, but if you really want to be friends, then offer this option again when the girl comes to her senses a little.
   • For example, say, “You are a wonderful person and I would like to be friends with you. I understand that you are not yet ready to respond to such an offer. "
   • You can also say: "Everyone suggests staying friends in such a situation, but I am speaking quite seriously."
6. 6 End the conversation on a good note. Try to end a difficult conversation on a good note. Thank the girl for the conversation, remind her of your offer to stay friends, or say something nice and walk you to the place where you met. You can try to defuse the situation with humor, but it doesn't always work. It's important to end the conversation on a good note so that she doesn't think you are heartless.
   • Say, “I hope you are not too upset. I wish you well, ”or“ I am very flattered by the interest of such a girl. ”
   • Try not to use platitudes like "You will meet the right guy soon", because the girl may be offended. That's not what she wanted to hear from you.
7. 7 Give the girl some time if you want to be friends. If you really want to continue to communicate with the girl, then do not rush to invite her to spend time in the same company. It may take weeks or months for her to get you out of her head, so meetings will be inappropriate for now. Be friendly in casual meetings, but leave the initiative to the girl so as not to invite her ahead of time.
   • When meeting, say hello, smile and ask “How are you?”. If she behaves deliberately detached, then there is no need to press.
   • If a girl doesn't want to be friends, then respect that choice.

Part 2 of 3: Breaking Bad News Differently

1. 1 Conversation in person. If you want to show the girl the respect you deserve, then it is better to explain yourself face to face. Alas, this is not always possible. Perhaps the girl lives in another city or you do not yet have the opportunity to meet in person, you barely know each other and do not want to be left alone to tell the news. There can be many reasons. Consider carefully whether you need to meet in person or whether you can explain yourself differently.
   • If you value a good relationship with a girl, then the rules of decency require you to talk to her in person.
2. 2 Call the girl. Explaining over the phone is almost as difficult as speaking face-to-face. If you do not have her number, then contact the girl's friends (do not act as if you want to invite her out on a date!) And try to talk on the phone as friendly and delicate as possible. Say about the same as you would say in a personal meeting: "I am very flattered by your interest, but you deserve to know that I cannot reciprocate you." Listen to the girl's response. It won't be easy, but you will feel better after the conversation. Talking on the phone is usually a little easier than meeting in person.
   • Say “It's not easy for me to say this, but you should know that I have no reciprocal feelings for you. I didn’t mean to hurt you, but I think it’s better to tell the truth right away. ”
3. 3 Send a message. Of course, reporting important information in SMS is not the best solution, and the girl will not really like to know the truth in this way. However, if she is very persistent and you don't want to meet in person, then send a short message to put an end to it. Subsequently, the girl will appreciate the fact that you yourself communicated your feelings, and did not shift the dirty work to others.
   • For example, write: “Hi, I know about your sympathy for me and appreciate it. Unfortunately, I cannot answer you in return. I think you should know the truth. "
4. 4 Write an email. Another way to explain yourself to a girl is to send a short and delicate letter. Email is not the most personal way to talk, but it will work if you have been communicating frequently in letters. In addition, the letter allows you to speak in more detail, in contrast to the messages. Don't write too much, be polite, and end your letter on a good note. For example:
   • “I know that you like me, but I do not have any reciprocal feelings. I hope you can handle it, and soon we will be able to communicate as friends again. "
5. 5 Talk online. Another way to communicate with a girl is by talking online (Facebook messages or chats). There is no need to talk about the weather for a long time. Better get down to business. Chatting on other topics for 20 minutes before breaking the news will make the girl think you want to get to know her better or even ask her out on a date. Write “Hello, how are you?” To start a conversation, then get straight to the point.
   • Don't hesitate. You don't have to make perfect sentences online. Just say that you have no romantic feelings for the girl. Be as delicate as possible. Don't just write “I don’t like you” directly. Better to say “I have no reciprocal feelings” to soften the blow.
6. 6 Write a note. Another way to communicate bad news is to write a handwritten note.This is a more personal approach than a letter or message, as she will understand that you took the time to hand-write the note and choose your words carefully. Keep your note short and polite. It is better to give the note after class so that the girl does not read it in the middle of class and does not burst into tears in front of strangers.
   • In 2–3 sentences, indicate that you have no romantic feelings in return. Please enter your name. Give the note in person to the girl so that others will not read it.

Part 3 of 3: What not to do

1. 1 Don't commit others before talking to the girl. If you value the girl as a person, then do not rush to tell your friends, the girl's friends and strangers about your feelings. Show respect even if you are completely indifferent to her. Talk to her before others know it.
   • Put yourself in the shoes of a girl - how would you feel if you heard such news from other people?
   • If the girl's friends are interested in your attitude towards her, first explain with the girl and only then answer the questions.
2. 2 Do not talk to a girl in front of strangers. Better not to explain yourself in front of other people. It may seem much easier to approach a girl at a party or when she is in the company of friends, but this will take her by surprise and make her even more upset, since it will be difficult for her to digest what happened next to other people. It is not always possible to find a girl alone, but try to talk in private.
   • There is no need to embarrass a girl in the presence of girlfriends and friends. Respect other people's feelings and the right to personal secrets.
3. 3 Do not lie. Guys often make this mistake and mislead the girl because they are afraid to tell the truth. No need to give false hopes like “I'm not ready for a relationship yet, but everything is possible in the future”, “You are great for me, but I can't afford to fall in love” or “I need time to forget another girl”. It may seem that this will soften the blow, but this will only prolong her suffering. Don't make unrealistic promises out of a desire to make things easier for yourself.
   • Make it clear that you have no romantic feelings for her and are not considering dating in the future. The sooner she understands this, the faster she will return to normal.
4. 4 Don't insult the girl. Don't assume that being lightly rude will help you express your point of view clearly. Don't tell the girl that you like a different type, she is too talkative or not smart enough for you. Also, don't say you like the prettier girl in the class. Suffice it to say that your feelings are not mutual.
   • Don't say "I have nothing to say to you" or "You annoy me a little." There is no need to offend an already wounded girl.
5. 5 Don't look for silly excuses. It may seem like an excuse is the best way to protect yourself from hate, but it's better to tell the truth. Never say, “It's not you, it's me,” because every girl has heard such an excuse. Don't say that you are too busy for a relationship if you would have found time for another girl. Don't say that you don't need a relationship if in reality you would happily date another girl. Tell her the truth to earn respect.
   • Don't make yourself a liar. Would you like to hear the truth in its place, too?
6. 6 Don't hesitate. If you know that a girl likes you, but she is not interesting to you, then talk to her at the earliest convenient opportunity. The longer you remain silent, the longer you will give unrealizable hope. It is better to tell the truth right away so that she can quickly recover and move on.
   • This method may seem easier for you, but you don't need to try to convey the truth to her through other people or catch the eye with another girl. It will be too strong a blow.

Tips

• Don't let the girl change the subject. In this case, immediately get back to the point.
• Be polite.You don't have to be rude to put things right.
• Maintain eye contact while talking. Don't let the girl ignore you or stare at the floor.
• Smile or be serious as the case may be. Do not smile if she spreads unpleasant rumors about you. If she follows you on your heels, then go for it!

Warnings

• Never say, "I don't like you!" This phrase hurts the girl very much.
• If you don't like the girl's hairstyle, then this does not meanthat "you don't like her." Find a good reason to end your relationship.