Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Move away
• Method 2 of 3: Understand Your Feelings
• Method 3 of 3: Move on
• Tips
• Warnings

It doesn't matter which of you ended the relationship, it still hurts. When a relationship ends, it can be difficult to come to terms with, and not everyone can get together and move on. Someone succeeds far from immediately, so our article will show you ways to make it easier to get over a breakup.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Move away

1. 1 Stop communicating with your boyfriend. Tell him clearly that you do not want to continue the relationship anymore, and do not drag out the separation for too long.
   • If you have not made the decision to end the relationship, try to clarify the situation immediately.
     • Don't use vague phrases like "we seem to be failing" or "I don't think this is what I want now."
     • Speak directly. If a response is required from you, any phrase that is not in doubt, for example, "it's over", will do.
2. 2 Try not to cross paths with your ex. You can have mutual friends, interests, you can be colleagues or classmates. If possible, change your schedule, ask friends to let you know about your ex-boyfriend's plans, and update your social media pages with places where you intend to go and events you intend to attend.
   • Take care of your pages on social networks. Change your status, remove your ex-boyfriend from your friends, as well as all photos where you are together, and remove tags from photos posted by your mutual friends.
     • If your friends are on your side, ask them to remove your ex as well.
     • If your friends want to keep in touch with him, do not go to their pages so as not to see there photos or posts left by your ex-boyfriend.
   • Change your schedule. You will need to go to work or school anyway, even if your boyfriend is there too, so you need to learn how to go wherever you need to and not worry about meeting you-know-who there. Think about how to adjust your current schedule.
     • If you are studying with your ex-boyfriend, enter the classroom last, moments before the call. This will avoid unnecessary conversations.
     • If you have to work together, bring your coffee in a thermos and grab a snack at your workplace so you don't run into your ex in the kitchen. If you need to walk past your ex-boyfriend's desk to get to the toilet, try to find out if there is a way to use other toilets in the building. If you don't want to meet him at the copier, ask a colleague to make copies for you, or postpone this task until the end of the day.
     • If you both go to the same bar, store, gym, or any other place, try to be there on other days or a little earlier or later than usual.
3. 3 Keep your head busy with something else. Lack of meetings and conversations will not help you if inside you are still reliving all the good and bad moments of the relationship again. Keep yourself busy with something new to distract yourself from your memories.
   • Pick a new hobby. Have you always dreamed of learning oriental dancing? Interested in photography? Now is the time to plunge headlong into a new hobby - it will not only be useful for your development, but also take all your thoughts.
   • Volunteer. Research what volunteer organizations are in your city and sign up for one of them. You can join volunteers helping homeless animals, orphanages, elderly people.
     • Volunteering not only benefits others, but also forces you to open up. In addition, such activities stimulate the brain's pleasure center, and recent research has shown that altruistic behavior also increases your attractiveness in the eyes of potential partners.
   • Get rid of any reminders of your relationship. Throw away photographs, letters, gifts. If you are not ready to part with all this, at least put them in a box and hide them away.
     • Delete your ex-boyfriend's emails. If you want to keep some letters, move all letters from the guy to a separate folder and deal with them later.
     • If your ex-boyfriend gave you a piece of jewelry that might be of intangible value to him, ask if you should return the piece to him. If not, do whatever you see fit with the decoration.

Method 2 of 3: Understand Your Feelings

1. 1 Realize that sadness is a natural feeling. The end of a relationship, no matter how long the relationship has been, is a loss, and any loss is always accompanied by a feeling of grief and sadness. Everyone experiences differently, but in many ways, people are alike.
   • In 1969, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross described the five stages of accepting grief, a system that is now widely known within psychology. She believed that a person goes through 5 stages: denial, anger, trade (that is, an attempt to make a deal with fate), depression, acceptance.
     • You will not necessarily experience all five stages, and you will not necessarily go through them in that order. It's important to understand what to expect and remind yourself that whatever you are feeling is perfectly natural and normal.
     • You can also suffer from feelings of guilt, loneliness, self-doubt, anxiety, and a whole host of other negative emotions.
     • Your emotional state can affect your physical well-being. Common problems include headaches, nausea, insomnia, loss of appetite, weight gain, pain of various kinds, and weakness.
2. 2 Unleash your emotions. The longer you keep everything inside, the more difficult it will be for you to get rid of the pain. Share your experiences with close relatives, with friends - they will all be ready to listen to you. If you don't like talking, write about your feelings on your personal blog.
   • Talk to someone you trust. Ask your mom, grandmother, aunt, cousin, or best friend for help. It will become easier for you when you see that you are ready to listen, that someone understands how you feel.
   • Talk to your ex-boyfriend in your mind. Research shows that people who mentally say goodbye to their former partners recover faster from loss.
   • Write a letter to your ex-boyfriend, but don't send it. Instead of constantly replaying in your head what you might have said in the past or right now when you meet, write down all those thoughts. Do not pay attention to how competently and logically you write it. The most important thing is to throw out anger, sadness, resentment and all the other emotions that torment you on paper.
3. 3 Use obscene words if you feel the need for them. It turns out that foul language helps the pain go away. Research published in NeuroReport points to a direct link between swearing and pain relief.
4. 4 Turn to your spiritual side. Whatever you choose, turning to any spiritual practice will allow you to find peace after a breakup.
   • Findings from a study published in the British Medical Journal indicate that people with strong religious beliefs are better at coping with feelings of grief and loss than non-religious people.
   • Practice meditation. Every world religion includes an element of meditation, so choose what works best for you. You can do yoga, tai chi, ki gong, transcendental meditation, or simply recite prayers.
5. 5 See a psychologist if you find it difficult to cope with your condition on your own. Women who have failed to survive a breakup in 16 months have decreased brain activity in the centers responsible for emotion, motivation, and attention. In other words, with prolonged depression, the structure of the brain changes, which explains the inability to concentrate and collect. Do not allow yourself to suffer for a long time, seek help.

Method 3 of 3: Move on

1. 1 Spend time with your friends. Friends will always be there for you, no matter what is happening in your personal life, and now is the best time to give them more attention. Invite them to dinner, go to a club or mall with them. Spend more time together!
2. 2 Make a playlist that will keep you feeling good. Music stimulates the human brain to produce dopamine, the chemical that promotes good mood. Choose songs that make you smile, dance, and have fun.
   • You can choose songs with meaning. Cosmopolitan magazine has compiled a list of songs that are best suited to those experiencing a breakup.
     • "Since U Been Gone," by Kelly Clarkson
     • "Forget You," Sea Low Green
     • "Single Ladies," Beyonce
     • "So What," Pink
     • "Stronger," Britney Spears
   • Sing along to songs out loud without paying attention to anyone. Let them energize you. And if your ex-boyfriend told you that you have no hearing and no voice, sing louder!
3. 3 Get a pet. It's no secret why it is so good to have a cat or a dog at home. A four-legged friend will help you cope with loneliness, pain, depression, make you move more and be in good shape.
   • Walking your dog is a great way not only to warm up, but also to meet new people. Dating with pet owners like you will expand your social circle and allow you to find like-minded people.
   • Animals give unconditional love.You will not strive so hard and persistently to receive endless love and devotion from every young person with whom you could develop a relationship if you already have someone who will always be devoted to you.
4. 4 Get in shape. If you've dropped out of class, or if you didn't have the energy and urge to join the gym, now is the time to fix it. Exercise, like music, causes your body to release dopamine, so not only will you look your best, you will feel better, too.
   • Sports activities normalize sleep, fill you with strength and improve self-esteem, that is, restore those areas that could have suffered after a break.
   • If, after breaking up, you tried to numb the pain with food, you could gain a couple of pounds. Sports will help you get rid of them.
5. 5 Spend more time on your appearance. It is not necessary to completely change your wardrobe, hairstyle and makeup (although it never hurts) - any concern about your appearance will definitely pay off: you will feel better and be more attractive to the opposite sex.
   • Browse fashion magazines and websites for new ideas for yourself. You are not the only one seeking to change something in your image after breaking up - you will find many photos of celebrities illustrating their appearance before and after breaking up with someone.
   • You can change quite a bit: make a light coloring or change the color of the lip gloss. Something new in appearance will support your new outlook on life.
6. 6 Don't give up on new opportunities. You may not be ready to start a new relationship yet, but this does not mean that you should completely abandon communication with men. Keep an eye on nice guys, get out somewhere where you can flirt.
   • If you like someone, make eye contact with them and smile. You will not owe anyone anything if you do not refuse a conversation or an invitation to a cup of coffee.
   • If you start hanging out with someone you like, don't tell them about your past relationship or complain about your ex. Your new acquaintance will not be ready to immediately hear a story about your past, especially if this story is saturated with negativity. Don't say bad things about your ex - it will alienate the new man.

Tips

• The best way to forget your ex is to find a new one. Go somewhere where you can dance, meet someone, take a break from your worries. And every time you see your ex-boyfriend, think only of the good things that he brought into your life.

Warnings

• Don't share your personal life with everyone you meet. Don't leave sad messages on your social media pages, but also don't trumpet the whole world that you are happy - in this case, your ex-boyfriend may decide that this relationship never meant anything to you, and it will hurt him. Just don't post anything related to it anywhere.