Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 2: Dealing with Doubts
• Part 2 of 2: How to clear your doubts
• Tips

Doubt breeds many problems, including feelings of vulnerability, low self-esteem, frustration, depression, and despair. Doubting is quite normal and everyone goes through it. Sort out your doubts and turn them into positive experiences to solve the problem. Don't let doubt rob you of a fulfilling life. Seeking to explore and let go of doubt will help you find peace of mind.

Steps

Part 1 of 2: Dealing with Doubts

1. 1 Admit your doubts. You cannot solve a problem if you do not acknowledge the fact that it exists and affects your decisions. Doubt is for good reason and is not your enemy or a sign of inferiority.
2. 2 Question your doubts. What are you in doubt about? What are the reasons for anxiety? Asking questions helps you better understand your actions, so never be afraid to ask yourself. Focus on the things that are holding you back in order to recognize important doubts. Think carefully and it may turn out that such concerns are insignificant and not a problem.
3. 3 Distinguish and question common cognitive biases. No one can always clearly see the surrounding reality. Sometimes emotions cloud our judgment and things start to be perceived in a false light. Rate how inclined you are to do the following:
   • Filter or exclude positive aspects and focus on negative aspects. You may find that you are focused on one unpleasant detail that prevents you from considering the entire problem. Don't ignore this detail, but strive to see the big picture. All situations have some positive aspects.
   • To use excessive generalizations, to draw global conclusions based on isolated features. If one day something bad happens, then we suddenly expect such an event to happen again. Sometimes such over-generalizations lead to hasty conclusions. The person is convinced that he is dealing with a global problem, although his assumptions take into account only a small part of the available data. Never be afraid to look for additional information, information and data, especially those that call into question your generalizations.
   • Needless to dramatize, dwell on the worst possible outcome. You may be wondering, "What if something terrible happens to me?" This way of thinking often leads people to overestimate minor mistakes or downplay important positive events. Give yourself confidence and think about the best possible outcome and your goal.Events can develop in a completely different way, but this way of thinking will weaken doubts that are based on a fear of a worse outcome.
   • Draw emotional conclusions, accept feelings as true. You may be saying to yourself, "If something seems to me, then it is." Any point of view is limited, and feelings are just one of many aspects of a situation.
4. 4 Distinguish between reasonable and unfounded doubts. If you analyze doubts, some of them may turn out to be unfounded. Reasonable doubt is based on the likelihood that you want to take an action that is beyond your capabilities.
   • Think, your task is so similar to the work that you have successfully completed before, especially if it requires development. If the answer is yes, then you shouldn't doubt your abilities.
   • Unwarranted doubts often stem from cognitive biases. Learn to distinguish between such distortions to bring out any reckless doubt.
   • Some people find it helpful to write their feelings in a journal. This method allows you to capture and analyze your thoughts and emotions.
5. 5 Don't seek comfort. If you regularly turn to other people to confirm the correctness of your judgments or decisions, then by doing so you express an indirect distrust of yourself.
   • Such questions cannot be compared to asking for advice. Sometimes an outside perspective can help us better understand our concerns. If your doubts are related to skills and experience, talking to a specialist in this area will help you find a way out. It should be remembered that the decision is up to you.

Part 2 of 2: How to clear your doubts

1. 1 Train mindfulness. According to the principles of Buddhism, for awareness you need to think about the present, focus on the world around you and not think about the future. This is the only way to get rid of feelings of anxiety and uncertainty about the future. There are some very simple mindfulness exercises available.
   • Conscious breathing. Get into any comfortable position (sitting, standing, lying) and start taking slow, controlled breaths. Breathe naturally and notice the sensations your body will experience as you breathe. If thoughts begin to wander, focus your attention on the breath again. Do the exercise for a few minutes.
   • A minute of self-compassion. Assess the situation that is causing stress or doubt, and try to detect physical tension in your body. Recognize the pain and tension (for example, you can say the phrase: "This is a moment of suffering"). Tell yourself that suffering is part of life, a reminder of a similar nature of human fears. Finally, place your palms over your heart and then say a self-affirming phrase: "I should be kinder to myself" - or: "I should accept myself as I am." Change phrases depending on the nature of your doubts and reasons for concern.
   • Meditative walking. Find a place indoors or outdoors where you can take 10-15 steps and walk back and forth. Walk slowly to one side, stop and inhale, then turn around and walk back. Notice the different sensations in your body with each step. Notice your feelings as you move, including your breathing, the sensation of your feet on the floor, the sound of your steps.
2. 2 Change your perception of failure. This will help you stop doubting your ability because of the risk of failure. Failures happen, but it's not a disaster. Nobody is ever successful. Begin to see failure as opportunities to learn from lessons. Turn failures into "experiences", notice the aspects where you need to improve. Feel free to try again, but focus more on self-development this time.
   • As an example, think about your failures, however minor, and your subsequent actions to remedy the situation. Remember how you learned to ride a bike or play chess. After the first failure, you began to act differently and found the right path.
3. 3 Recognize your strengths. Each person has a number of achievements. Think back to times in the past when you achieved any goal you set. Use this experience to believe in yourself and strive for more. Some accomplishments even allow you to get rid of fear and increase self-esteem.
   • Our life consists of big and small achievements. Pick something big, like a successful project or losing weight with a new diet. Sometimes it's enough just to remember any good deed or friend who appreciates your relationship.
   • Try to treat yourself the way you would treat a friend if he were in your place. Surely you would offer him support and sympathy. You shouldn't make higher demands on yourself.
4. 4 Give up perfectionism. If you strive not only to achieve success, but to do everything perfectly, then the goal will become almost unattainable. This attitude creates the fear of failure and leads to mistakes. Set achievable goals for yourself. You will soon find that giving up on “ideal” goals will not bring about the intended frustration or judgment.
   • As with doubts, you should acknowledge your desire to do everything perfectly. If you often hesitate, easily give up on tasks that you do not succeed in doing well, or struggle with little things, then you are most likely a perfectionist.
   • Think about how an outsider would assess your situation. Would he have behaved as selflessly or loyal? See your goal from a different angle.
   • Look at things from a broader perspective, so as not to drown in the details. Imagine the worst outcome. Can you handle this situation? Will you remember her every other day, week, year?
   • Determine the acceptable level of imperfection. Decide which aspects do not require you to be perfect. List the costs and benefits of perfectionism.
   • Try to overcome your fear of imperfection. Challenge yourself with intentional small mistakes: send a letter without error checking or leave a mess in the visible part of your home on purpose. Such oversights (deliberately made up) will help to accept imperfection.
5. 5 Learn to deal with uncertainty. Sometimes doubts arise for the reason that we cannot be completely confident in our future. No one knows how to predict the future, so there is always some degree of uncertainty. Failure to come to terms with such uncertainty can shackle a person and prevent him from doing positive things.
   • Make a list of what you can do if you are in doubt or need to complete a task. If you regularly seek to hear other people's assurances of success (not advice) or hesitate and repeatedly double-check the work done, then pay attention to which tasks provoke this behavior. Think about how you behave in such situations, especially if the result does not meet your expectations. It may turn out that the most undesirable outcome will not happen, and the shortcomings are easy to fix.
6. 6 Move towards your goal in small steps. The daunting task must be broken down into doable actions. Celebrate every success you make, rather than worry about the amount of work ahead.
   • Don't be afraid to set a timeline. They will help you prioritize tasks. For the most important tasks, you need to put in more effort, but at the same time not spend a lot of time on small things. Stick to such a framework. The work will be distributed in accordance with the allotted time.

Tips

• It is sometimes helpful to ignore setbacks, but you shouldn't skip situations that can be corrected (pay off a debt or improve relationships).