Content

• Steps

Being alone can sometimes be difficult. Whether you're single, living alone, or simply find it difficult to adapt to being "alone", maintaining the joy of being with no one around can be challenging. This is because we often expect others to help us fill in the void. However, you can still be happy when you are alone by becoming independent, building a positive perspective, and increasing self-awareness.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Become independent

1. 

   Develop independence. Humans, especially extroverts (like to socialize and receive energy from those around them), sometimes need others to help them feel happy or satisfied. However, to become happy when we are alone, we first need to rely on ourselves and reduce our dependence on others to be happy. If you are an extrovert, handling things on your own will help you practice developing your communication skills with strangers instead of just meeting close friends. Fortunately, you can keep going with your extrovert habits even when no one is around.
   • Focus on developing your confidence by working out in tandem with do-it-yourself activities and giving you the chance to discover new things. For example, if you've always wanted to learn how to play an instrument, now is the right time to start. Online tutorials will help you get started with the learning process.
   • Try to handle work alone. Before you ask for help or want someone to accompany you, give it a go. For example, if you often enjoy shopping with your partner, don't be afraid to try the experience of being alone. You may feel uncomfortable at first, but over time, the discomfort will fade away and you should feel better.

2. 

   
   
   Discover things that interest you. Find out about your interests and experience them on your own. You can try doing things you have never done before to find out what you like. If you are an extrovert, you will find it difficult because of the need to be with many people, especially when doing things you enjoy. However, as you spend a lot of time alone on what you like, it gets easier over time.
   • Get busy. There are many activities that will satisfy your desire to explore, such as: art, dancing, writing, reading, playing musical instruments, hiking, camping, taking care of pets, traveling and cooking. . Use the planner to get things done for the week and add a few more activities if you have free time.
   • Choose activities that provide bonding even when you are alone. Extroverts will enjoy interactive activities when they are alone such as texting, chatting on the phone, or participating in social networking sites. This way, you will feel happier and more connected with others when no one is around.

3. 

   
   
   Experience a new hobby. You're probably used to spending a lot of time with other people. However, don't worry, you will easily adapt to being with yourself. You can take advantage of your alone time to discover something new that you've always wanted.
   • You may have always wanted to try yoga but was afraid to sign up for a class. Why not buy a DVD or download some yoga videos? You can still experience bliss without the presence of others.
   • Try gardening. This is a personal activity that offers an attractive reward. Not only will you have new experiences, but also the fruits of beautiful flowers and fresh vegetables.
   • Embark on an art and craft project. You can try making mosaic, watercolor, or relax with an adult coloring book.
   • You can also make a plan or do something for your loved ones. This way, time alone gives you the opportunity to focus on and nurture your relationships.

4. 

   
   
   Adapting to being alone. There are many ways to help you better understand yourself. For example, spend some time thinking about your greatest wish. When you spend more time alone in your activities, you will gradually feel more comfortable in the absence of other people. Coping with your fear of being alone will help you feel less afraid and get used to it. Get used to being alone for a short period of time and gradually increase the amount of time.
   • Beginners can try activities like walking, eating, and shopping by yourself.
   • Avoid drinking alcohol or using drugs to cope with being alone.
   • Alone and loneliness are two completely different states. Friend may be alone without feeling lonely.

5. 

   Enjoy your "private world". Maybe you just moved in your first apartment. Whether you miss your family, roommate, or ex, you will get used to living alone over time. It is important to remember that a private space will bring a lot of convenience to your life.
   • Have you ever been tired of your roommate constantly eating all your food? Now you are free to sip everything you buy and cook.
   • You used to feel uncomfortable when your ex was constantly throwing shoes around in the house. When living alone, you will have a neat and tidy house as you like.
   • Or, you often feel cold and used to live with people who hated raising the temperature of an air conditioner. This annoyance will stop when you have your own accommodation. No one else can stop you from adjusting the air conditioner temperature to your needs for comfort.

6. 

   Reassure yourself. Self-reassurance is the top coping skill you should use when learning how to cope with being single. If negative emotions (anger, sadness, loneliness) arise, you need to know how to calm yourself down. Extroverts feel better at reassuring themselves because being alone can make excited people uncomfortable.
   • Praise yourself. Instead of waiting to be praised by others, we need to learn to praise ourselves. For example, if you feel like you're not doing well at work or school, try telling yourself what a friend would say, like, “Are you telling the truth? You did a great job! ”. Perhaps extroverts will depend on the recognition of others, but they will feel better knowing how to motivate them.
   • Tell yourself that you will be fine by yourself! You should also be fine going out alone.
   • Focus on the positive qualities and the things you enjoy about yourself. Recognize your flaws, but don't let them break you down.
   • Write down your feelings. Taking your heart out on paper will help you feel better and help clarify the problem.

7. 

   Appreciate yourself. Take the time to celebrate your good qualities and take a look at your excellence. You can even write these in your gratitude diary.
   • For example, you could say “I have successfully completed a task assigned by the company. I am a useful member of the group ”.
   • Or, just look in the mirror and say, "I have kind eyes."
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Method 2 of 3: Build a positive perspective

1. 

   Think happy things. This sounds silly, but it is very practical! Introverts (taking energy from being alone) and people feeling anxious about social situations can become happy alone by thinking about the positive things in relationships, and being alone. Research shows that people who feel lonely often have negative thoughts because they expect negative results in their social relationships and think they do everything they can to stay connected. Changing your mindset can help you reduce your feelings of loneliness and increase your satisfaction when you are alone.
   • Think of the positives you can get from being alone.For example, you can feel free to do what you want and focus on yourself.
   • A sad or lonely state is a kind of thinking. Think about the great things you've achieved in life and the many other things you can continue to reap.

2. 

   Say positive things to yourself. If you find yourself thinking a negative thing like "No one wants to be with you", turn that thought into something more practical like, "Someone who loves me also wants to spend time with me, just sometimes. they have work to be busy ”.
   • Write down the things you are grateful for in life, such as: family, friends, food, home, relationships, etc.

3. 

   Love and accept yourself. This is an important factor in creating a happy life when you are alone. See yourself as a friend and focus on cherishing the positive aspects of you.
   • If you are an introvert, tell yourself that your personality is perfectly normal and acceptable! If you feel anxious about social situations, accept your feelings and avoid putting pressure on yourself; it is not unusual for people to experience anxiety in some communication situations from time to time.
   • List the things you like about yourself, your talents, and what others seem to like about you. Put this list in a safe place so you can see if you feel lonely while alone. Don't forget to ask friends and family to add something else to your list. You can also make a list of the achievements and the positive reviews you have received.
   • Don't compare yourself to others to avoid feeling frustrated, jealous, and inferior. This happens because we tend to see good things in others and idealize them.

4. 

   Nurture your relationships. Cultivating healthy relationships can help you overcome your fear of being alone and have a more positive outlook. If you feel secure in your relationships, you will also be less sad without your loved ones. Introverts and people with social anxiety often seek deep connections (rather than having lots of friends or acquaintances); Therefore, maintaining strong and mutually supportive relationships (rather than abusive or negative) is often very important.
   • Try to build relationships based on quality standards rather than quantity. When you spend time with others, focus on talking and bonding instead of just silently watching TV.
   • Allow people to respect you and behave in the way you want to enter your life. Avoid people who make you feel insecure, threatened or abandoned. Seek help when you are worried about ending those relationships.
   • When you are alone, think about good memories with your loved one. You could also write about a fun experience and relive it.

5. 

   Participate in active activities. Know what activities can help improve your mood. If you don't know where to start, try a new activity and see if you feel better alone. Introverts often know what they like to do when no one is around, but exciting activities (like exercise) can also help.
   • Find out what activities you love and do by yourself. However, don't worry if you don't enjoy what your friends and loved ones love.
   • Write down what motivates you. Here are a few suggestions for you: stay close to nature, listen to positive songs, explore new lands, soak in a soap bath, go shopping and read an inspirational story.
   • Play game. Try Sudoku or other brain training games. As such, you will have the opportunity to entertain and challenge yourself.
   • Play the role of a tourist. Why not try exploring your city in a different way? When you are alone, you can go at your favorite pace, explore the shops at will, and enjoy dining when you need it.
   • Find a free music show in the neighborhood. Many community groups and music schools often perform for free (or at low cost). Experience and immerse yourself in the music.

6. 

   Practice mindfulness. Using mindfulness to reduce stress can help you feel less lonely. Mindfulness is the state of "here and now", or living in the present moment, appreciating what's going on without sinking into the past or worrying about the future.

7. 

   Step out of your comfort zone. Take advantage of time alone to experience new things. Getting out of your comfort zone can help you feel full of life and make life more enjoyable. Don't be afraid to try things you don't normally do!
   • Perhaps you have always wanted to learn to ride but feel apprehensive at the horse's magnitude. Now is the time to boldly sign up for a beginner riding class.
   • Is your dream to be a writer? Start a blog on any topic - like riding lessons or share some new recipes you've just tried.

8. 

   Do exercise. Research shows that people living alone seldom choose active coping. However, active coping like exercise produces endorphins in your brain that make you feel more positive and happy. Introverts or people with social anxiety should exercise in public to feel more comfortable in a social setting (such as running at the beach, weightlifting at the gym).
   • Try interesting forms of movement so that you don't feel strenuous. Some other forms of exercise include walking, aerobic dancing, yoga, gardening, hiking, rock climbing, cycling, sports (there are many that you can practice on your own), jogging, swimming, skateboarding and martial arts.

9. 

   Change the scene. The truth is that you may feel lonely at home alone for long periods of time. By changing the location, your thoughts will be renewed. Try making a small change or making a big difference from the usual.
   • If you work from home, you may feel isolated at some point. Try sitting at a coffee shop one afternoon, or going to the library. The presence of a stranger can change your mood.
   • Traveling. If you've been under a lot of stress lately, you may need to go to the cafe more. Plan a trip.
   • Traveling alone is no stranger to many people. You can travel "dust", or sign up for group travel. Now is the time to come up with ideas for destinations.

10. 

    Set goals. Research shows that people who feel lonely or isolated lose meaning and goals in life. People can become sensitive to being isolated or not feeling the meaning of life. As human beings, we need meaning to realize the value in our own existence; This requires us to have a goal.
    • Goals can include many aspects: career, family, religion, spiritual life development, support for those in need, giving meals and sharing clothes under difficult circumstances, making changes in society. , assisting others in healing, etc.
    • Start by making a list of personal values ​​(such as those listed above). Next, you will define the goal or goal of each value. For example, if one of your values ​​is developing your spiritual life, perhaps your goal will be to influence others in a positive and spiritual way. In this case, you can join the spiritual community and share insights related to your beliefs.
    • Start your day by looking at your list of values ​​along with your goals, and find ways to get what you want. You can also act as small as smiling at strangers to get closer to your goals.
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Method 3 of 3: Increase self-awareness

1. 

   Learn yourself. Increasing your self-awareness can increase your pleasure in being alone. As you get to know yourself better and know who you are, you won't have trouble creating fun for yourself. To increase self-awareness, you first need to pay attention to yourself, your thoughts, your feelings, and your behavior.
   • Take time to talk to yourself to see how you feel. You can ask questions like, “How do I feel? What am I responding to? What do I want to do? "
   • You can also ask those close to you to find out what they recognize and think of your outstanding qualities.

2. 

   Write diary. Writing your thoughts and feelings on paper can help you learn more about yourself by talking to yourself. You can also practice gratitude by recording your thoughts in a gratitude journal. Just take a moment during the day to write down the things you are grateful for. Better yet, make this a habit.
   • You can write "I appreciate being able to contact my brother over the phone".
   • It could also be something as simple as "I'm grateful for a good bakery in the neighborhood".

3. 

   Find out what difficulties you are having while alone. Personality can be a factor in your troubles; Some people, for example, have a higher degree of extroversion than others. Being extroverted means that you get energized from being around others, while introversion means you will be energized by being alone.
   • Loneliness can stem from feelings of grief and loss, trauma, or problems with how you see yourself.
   • Feeling lonely due to age is also common.
   • Research shows that people who feel lonely often experience additional conditions such as anxiety, anger, pessimism, feelings of discomfort and anxiety.

4. 

   Consider treatment. Feeling lonely can be a symptom of a more serious condition like depression. If your feelings of loneliness are growing or you cannot tolerate being alone, seeking special support may help. Psychotherapy is an effective way to help you get to know yourself better. In addition, this solution also helps you to cope with life alone.
   • Contact the health insurance company to find psychiatrists, therapists and psychiatrists (when medication is needed) on the list of covered insurance.
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