Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

Kindness is a fundamental way to give meaning to our lives. Not only that, but kindness also brings joy to those around us. Kindness helps us communicate better, has deeper compassion and also creates positive resources in everyone's life. Kindness is your inner purity, and besides the kind people from birth, anyone can choose to cultivate their inherent kindness.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Develop a kind outlook

1. 

   Take an interest in others sincerely. At the most basic level, kindness is shown by genuinely caring for those around you, wanting the best for them, and realizing that they also have wants, needs, and aspirations. even fear like you. Kindness contains warmth, excitement, patience, a sense of trust, loyalty, and gratitude. Piero Ferrucci views kindness as "effortless" because it frees us from the suffocation of negative attitudes and emotions, such as resentment, jealousy, distrust, and manipulation. After all, being kind is deeply concerned with all life.
   • Practice being kind and generous towards others. Not having the opportunity to practice, feeling shy, or not knowing how to connect with others can only be overcome through action; By continually trying, you will gradually have a natural urge to be kind and give more.
   • Does not require reciprocity. Great kindness does not expect anything, does not bind, and does not condition any actions or words.

2. 

   
   
   Don't be kind just because you want to get what you want. Beware of delusional kindness. Kindness is not "politeness for personal gain, deliberate generosity, superficial courtesy". Being kind is not being kind to others because you are sure that it will manipulate them, force them to deliver what you want, or become a means of controlling them. Kindness is not pretending to care for someone when you are suppressing anger or contempt; even hiding the rage or disappointment behind fake jokes is not kind.
   • In the end, it's not kindness to become a person of respect; This is concession and does not want to cause trouble, because you are afraid that as long as you do something different, everything will fall apart.

3. 

   
   
   Be kind to yourself. The common mistake many people make is trying to be kind to others but not focusing on being kind to themselves. The reason may be that you don't like something about yourself, but more often than not, the point is that you are still not sure about yourself. The sad thing about not knowing yourself well is that your kindness to others runs the risk of becoming delusional as described in the previous step. Or, that kindness can be exhausting and disillusioned because you've put everyone before you.
   • By understanding yourself, you will realize what brings pain and inconsistency, and accept your own inconsistencies and inconsistencies. In addition, this is an opportunity for you to improve things that you are not satisfied with. From there, understanding yourself helps you avoid imposing negative sides on others and you will gradually treat others with love and kindness.
   • Take time to understand yourself and use this understanding to become kinder to yourself (remember all we all have flaws) and others. This way, the anxiety in your heart will be relieved, instead of provoking the need to express pain and hurt.
   • Avoid seeing the time spent understanding your own needs and limitations as selfish; on the contrary, this is a prerequisite for you to bond with others with full strength and awareness.
   • Ask yourself what it's like to be kind to yourself. For many people, being kind to yourself is controlling the voice in your thoughts and stopping negative thoughts.

4. 

   
   
   Learn from the kindness of others. Think about the truly kind people in your life and how they make you feel. Do you see their warmth in your heart every time you think about them? Chances are yes, because kindness lingers and warms you, even if you face the toughest of challenges. When you are loved by others for who you really are, you will never forget their beliefs and how they strengthened your values, and their kindness will last forever. forever.
   • Remember how kindness brought you joy. What is it about their kindness that makes you feel special and loved? Is there anything in their actions that you can sincerely redo the same?

5. 

   Cultivate kindness for your own health. Mindfulness and happiness both come from positive thinking, and kindness is a positive mental state. Kindness is about giving and opening up to others, but it also gives us a sense of fulfillment and connection that improves our mental and well-being.
   • It may seem simple enough, but kindness carries an immense reward that cannot be replaced and is a self-esteem booster.

6. 

   Make a habit of focusing on kindness. Leo Babauta thinks that kindness is a habit that everyone can cultivate. He suggests focusing on kindness every day for a month. At the end of this process of absolute concentration, you will notice profound changes in your life and feel better about yourself; At the same time, the reaction of those around you will be different, they will also treat you better. According to him, in the long run, kindness is karma. Some tips for cultivating kindness include:
   • Do one kind thing for someone every day. Make a clear decision each morning about what kind of action you are going to do and take time to accomplish it for the day.
   • Being kind, friendly, and compassionate when communicating with others, and even with ordinary people, makes you angry, stressed, or upset. Turn kindness into your strength.
   • Turn small acts of kindness into great compassion. Volunteering to help those in need and proactively sharing the pain of others are both great acts of compassion.
   • Meditate to spread kindness. Learn how to practice Lovingkindness Meditation (Metta).

7. 

   Be kind to everyone, not just those "in need". Expand your range of kindness. It is easy to be kind when we unconsciously do what Stephanie Dowrick calls "superiors' kindness." This is a term used to refer to kindness for someone we think really need help (the sick, the poor, the weak and those who fit our own conceptions). In fact, it's still easier to be kind to those who are emotionally close to us (like family or friends) or otherwise (same country, color, gender, etc.). being kind to those whom the philosopher Hegel called "the rest". It will be more difficult to treat people we consider to be on par with us, but every effort pays off.
   • The problem with giving kindness to "appropriate" situations is because we don't realize the need to be kind to everyone, no matter who they are, how rich they are, the price What are their values ​​and beliefs, how they behave and attitudes, what their backgrounds are, the degree of similarity between them and us, etc.
   • When we treat only those we consider worthy, we are demonstrating our own prejudice and judgment, and behaving only conditionally. Natural kindness is directed to all life; The challenges you face when trying to put this broad concept into practice will sometimes feel helpless, but you will increasingly understand your kindness.
   • If you are indifferent to being kind to someone just because you think they can get things done without your support or understanding, you are just practicing selective kindness.

8. 

   Limited judgment. If you really want to be kind, stop judging. Instead of spending time criticizing others, learn to be positive and cultivate compassion. If you often think badly of others, wish they could improve their abilities, or feel that everyone around you is dependent or weak, you won't know what sincere kindness is. Stop judging others and realize that you won't be able to understand their situation unless you live their life. Focus on helping others instead of judging that they can't do better than they really are.
   • If you are judgmental, gossip, or always gossip the people around you, you will never be able to overcome your limitations to be kind.
   • Kindness is believing in the good side of everyone instead of expecting perfection.
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Part 2 of 3: Developing kind qualities

1. 

   Show compassion for others. The important thing to remember is "Be kind, because everyone you meet is fighting a tough fight". Arguably Plato's maxim, this quote admits that everyone is going through life's challenges or problems and it is easy to forget at times when we are indulged in problems. your own topic or anger for the unsatisfactory. Before you do anything to negatively affect others, ask yourself a simple "Is this action nice?". When you are unable to give an affirmative answer, that signal is a reminder to change your action and immediately resolve the problem.
   • Even if you are feeling very badly, remember that others are feeling insecure, pain, hardship, sadness, disappointment, and loss. This doesn't mean you should take your feelings lightly, but it does help you realize that people's reactions are more often from trauma and pain than from their own completeness; Kindness is the key to letting go of anger and connecting with your real inner self.

2. 

   Don't expect perfection. If you tend to be perfectionists, like competition, or are always in a hurry, your kindness will often be influenced by your ambitions and pace of life, and your fear of being. considered lazy or selfish. Remember to slow down and forgive yourself when things go wrong.
   • Learn from your mistakes instead of criticizing yourself or comparing yourself to others. Through compassion for yourself, you will begin to recognize the needs of others with compassionate eyes.

3. 

   Focus on the present. The greatest gift of kindness you can give others is to be there in their presence, listen attentively, and give them full attention. Rearrange your schedule for the day and stop being in a rush. To be present in the present means to be; To do so, you cannot continue rushing or squeeze in the flow of life.
   • Limit the use of technology when communicating with others. Technology communication happens quickly and without the presence of people like texting or emailing an important role in life, but that is not the only way of communication. Spend time connecting with others through in-person meetings or through uninterrupted calls. In addition, you can also send letters by hand instead of email and surprise someone with your kindness by taking the time to write on paper.

4. 

   Become a good listener. Listening is easy to say, but difficult to do, especially when you live in a hustle and bustle world where hustle and busyness is valued, and interrupting others because of too much work or rush. Running somewhere is also considered normal. However, turning busyness into a habit cannot be an excuse for poor behavior. When you talk to someone, learn to listen consciously and pay close attention to the speaker until they have fully shared their thoughts and stories.
   • Truly listening, making eye contact, avoiding distractions, and spending time with someone are the best acts of kindness. Take the time to listen and understand what the speaker has to say before interrupting or responding with a prepared response. Let the speaker know that you understand their situation and be willing to listen.
   • Listening does not mean being good at problem solving. Sometimes the best thing you can do is be there to listen and admit that you don't know what the speaker should do.

5. 

   Optimistic. Happiness, joy and gratitude are the bright spots of kindness, helping you see the good in others and the world around them, empowering you to overcome all challenges, despair, and destruction. rings that you have to see or experience, continually reinforce your belief in people. Maintaining a positive attitude is a way to ensure that your kind actions are performed with joy and joy, rather than reluctantly or out of responsibility. In addition, a sense of humor helps you to be less strict with yourself and see the opposition and contradictions in life with a spirit of goodwill.
   • Staying optimistic isn't always easy, especially when you're having a bad day. With practice, however, anyone can cultivate optimism by focusing on the positive rather than the negative, thinking about future happiness, and living a life of more joy than sadness. Nobody taxes when you look on the bright side of things.
   • Being positive and positive not only helps you to have a correct sense of kindness, but also brings joy to those around you. If it takes too long to complain, it will be difficult for the people in your life to be happy.
   • Learn how to be happy, how to be funny, and how to show gratitude to cultivate optimism.

6. 

   Friendly. Kind people are also usually friendly. This doesn't mean they're the closest, but they often try to get acquainted with new people and help them feel comfortable in their new environment. If you are meeting new students at school or new work colleagues, try chatting with that person, recommending relevant events, and inviting them to team events. Even if you're not an easygoing person, smiling and talking to people will make you a lot more friendly, and your kindness will leave a deep impression.
   • Friendly people are usually kind because they want the good of others.They chatted with someone they just met or just met impartially, making the other person extremely comfortable.
   • If you're naturally shy, you don't need to completely change your personality. Instead, just make an extra effort to be kind to others by being attentive, inquisitive, and by concern for them.

7. 

   Polite. Although being polite by itself is not necessarily kind, sincerity in polite manners will show your respect for the other person. Being polite is a kind way to get the other person's attention and express your point of view. Some simple ways to behave politely include:
   • Find other ways to express your requests or responses to others. For example, say "Am I allowed?" instead of "Can I?"; say "I'm surprised" instead of "It's not fair"; say "Let me put it another way" instead of "That's not what I said". Changing expressions says a lot.
   • Conduct standards. Keep doors open to others, avoid being vulgar, and not be too intimate with first-time people.
   • Give other people a sincere compliment.
   • Learn to be courteous and kind so you know what to do.

8. 

   Grateful. People who are really kind are often comfortable showing gratitude. They don't take what they have for granted and always thank others for helping them. They know how to say "thank you" sincerely, they write thank you cards, and they freely admit that they've been helped. Grateful people also thank others for small things like someone giving them joy, instead of just saying thank you for helping with the job done. If you become more aware of your habit of being grateful to those around you, you will also find yourself more kinder.
   • When you realize the good things people around you do for you, you will be more willing to treat others well. In addition, you also feel more deeply about the goodness that the kindness of others brings to you and the desire to spread love.
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Part 3 of 3: Action

1. 

   Loves animals and habitats. Loving animals and taking good care of pets is kindness. You may not be concerned with the lives of other species, especially in this period when the dominant instruments of humanity were too powerful. However, the act of loving and cherishing animals for their value shows a profound kindness. Likewise, protecting our lingering living environment and nurturing our lives is a meaningful and kind thing; Make sure not to damage any of the factors that lead to a healthy life.
   • Adopt a pet. Your kindness will be rewarded with joy and love from the little creature that you brought to your life.
   • Help your friend look after the pet when they are away. Let your friends feel secure knowing that someone loves and cares for their pets when they are not at home.
   • Respect the animals you are caring for. Humans do not "own" animals; on the contrary, we have a responsibility to take care of their lives.
   • Take the time to participate in activities that recreate your local environment with the community in which you live. Go for a walk in nature with family and friends, or go it alone, and embrace the environment in which you are part. Share their love for nature with others to re-bond their connection with nature.

2. 

   Share. Kind people feel happy when sharing with others. You can share your favorite sweater, a delicious half loaf of bread, or career advice with your younger friends. It is important that you share what you really care about, instead of giving away what you no longer need. It makes a lot more sense to lend your girl your favorite sweater instead of giving her the old leftover one you never wear. Sharing with others will make you more generous and kinder.
   • Be mindful of the benefits others can benefit from your items. They don't always ask for them, but you can proactively make suggestions before they admit they need something from you.

3. 

   Laugh more. A smile is a small but kind gesture and has many benefits. Make it a habit to laugh with strangers, friends or acquaintances. Even though you don't have to go everywhere with a smile on your face, smiling at others not only makes them smile back, but it also brings little joy to them. Plus, the smile will deceive your mind, making you feel happier than before. Everyone benefits when you smile and you will become kinder over time.
   • When you smile at someone, they'll feel more comfortable, and it makes you look friendlier too - another way to be kind. Receiving others attentively, even trusting strangers by smiling at them, is also a way to be kind.

4. 

   Interested in everyone. Really kind people who sincerely care about others. They don't treat others properly just because they want to get what they want or because they want to ask for help. They do this because they truly care about others and want everyone around them to be happy and healthy. To be kinder, try to be considerate of the other person and let them feel that through your kindness, thoughtfulness, inquiry, and attention to them. Here are a few ways to care about people:
   • Sincerely inquire about everyone's situation.
   • Find out other people's interests, interests, and families.
   • If the person you care about has just had a big life event, ask how it was going.
   • If someone you know is about to take an important exam or interview, give them all the best wishes.
   • When you talk to others, be sure to give them the opportunity to talk as much as you do. Don't monopolize the conversation, but focus more on the person you are talking to rather than yourself.
   • Make eye contact and don't use the phone when you are talking with other people. Let them know they are your number one priority.

5. 

   Calling a friend for no reason. You don't always need a reason to call a good friend. Make a goal of calling one or two friends a week to ask about them and keep them informed. Don't call to make a plan or ask the friend for anything specific; Call because you miss them and think about them. Unexpectedly contacting your friends will make them feel cared for and you will also feel better; This shows kindness and thoughtfulness.
   • If you don't have a lot of time, start getting into the habit of calling your friends on their birthdays. Don't be lazy and text or post on Facebook, call your friends and chat honestly.

6. 

   Donations. Donating your belongings to charity is also a kind act. Instead of throwing away old things or selling them for cheap at the second hand market, donate items that you no longer use for a good cause. If you have good clothes, books, or household items, making a habit of donating instead of filling them up or leaving them out is a great way to spread your kindness to others. .
   • If you have clothes or books that someone you know needs, don't hesitate to hand them over. Here's another way to be kind.

7. 

   Perform acts of kindness spontaneously. Princess Diana once said: "Act spontaneously act of kindness without expecting reciprocal, surely one day other people will do the same to you." Spontaneous acts of kindness still exist and are good as a conscious attempt to spread kindness; There are even groups formed to perform this basic civic mission! Here are a few suggestions for spontaneous kindness you can do:
   • Clean out trash in front of you and your neighbor's house.
   • Help your friends wash the car.
   • Pay someone's parking fee.
   • Help someone else carry a large bag.
   • Place a gift on someone else's door.
   • Get more information for ideas for spontaneous acts of kindness.

8. 

   Change your life with kindness. Changing your way of life and your outlook on life can be frustrating. But remember Aldous Huxley's advice on changing your life: "People often ask me the most effective way to change their lives. It's a shame that after years of research and experimentation, I have to say that the best answer is just - live well. than."Remember Huxley's years of research and let kindness change your life, helping you overcome emotions and actions stemming from aggression, hatred, contempt, anger, fear, and look down on yourself, while at the same time restoring strength lost from despair.
   • By being kind, you can make sure that caring for others, your surroundings, and yourself is the right way to live. It wasn't for the immediate effect; Kindness is your lifestyle choice, the hum and the constant rhythm of your actions and thoughts.
   • By being kind, you let go of the burden of worrying that others have more than you, are not as worthy or worthy than you, or are in a high or inferior position. Instead, kindness helps you realize that everyone has their value, and so do you.
   • By being kind, you realize that we are all connected. When you harm someone, you are harming yourself too. What you do to help others will also support you.
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Advice

• Saying hello to everyone you meet, from the salesperson to your boss, will brighten things around and make everyone feel at ease. Do it every day.
• You may not like everyone and that's okay; even the nicest people in the world will get angry at times! Even so, just continue to behave politely.
• Try not to hurt others physically or mentally. Self-control is important in many situations.

Warning

• If you are really angry and upset about someone, remember that being kind will make others thank you more than trying to control a wrongdoing. Everyone can make enough excuses for a wrongful act, but feeling kindly forgiven is something that will make them unforgettable.
• Make sure your kindness is needed. Sometimes the unnecessary help can have the opposite effect, so the ancients had the saying "please feel resentful". There are times when we think we are helping, but in reality we can cause problems if we don't have enough information about the problem.
• Don't talk about the good things you did; be humble. Doing good things just to get the praise of others is not kindness. Helping someone who doesn't know your support will also make you feel good.