Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is the ability to exploit your emotions and use them to make your life better. Connecting to your feelings allows you to handle stress and communicate effectively with others, two skills that elevate your life both personally and professionally. Unlike IQ, which remains constant throughout life, EQ can be developed and honed over time. See Step 1 to learn how to develop emotional intelligence using techniques you can try right away.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Exploiting Your Emotions

1. 

   Record your emotional responses to the events of the day. It's easy to let go of your feelings about your day's experiences until the next day. But taking time to acknowledge what you feel about your experiences is essential to improving your EQ. If you ignore your feelings, you are ignoring important information that has a major influence on your thinking and behavior. Start paying attention to your feelings and connecting them to experiences.
   • For example, you are at work and are interrupted during a meeting. What emotions will arise when this happens? On the other hand, how do you feel about being praised for doing a good job? Start practicing naming emotions such as sadness, embarrassment, joy, satisfaction, or any other sensation that will instantly boost your EQ.
   • Practice tapping into your emotions at certain times of the day. What is your first feeling when you wake up? Your last feeling before going to bed?

2. 

   
   
   Pay attention to the body. Instead of ignoring the physical manifestations of your emotions, start listening to them. Our mind and body are not separate; they have a rather deep interaction. You can boost your EQ by finding out how your body signals lead you to the emotions you are feeling. For example:
   • Stress can be like cramping, tightness in your chest, or shortness of breath.
   • Sadness can be like waking up with heavy limbs that you can't lift.
   • Pleasure or pleasure can be like butterflies, your stomach, your heart pounding or your energy increased.

3. 

   
   
   See how emotions and behavior are linked. When you feel strong emotions, how do you react? Be aware of your instinctive response to everyday situations, instead of reacting thoughtlessly. The more you understand what triggers your impulses, the higher your EQ will be, and you will be able to use what you already know to truly change your behavior in the future. Here are some examples of behaviors and what's behind them:
   • Feeling ashamed or insecure can lead you to withdraw from the conversation and disconnect.
   • Feeling angry can cause you to raise your voice or get rid of the anger.
   • Feeling overwhelmed can cause you to panic and lose track of what you're doing, or burst into tears.

4. 

   
   
   Avoid judging your own feelings. All the emotions you have have value, even the negative emotions. If you judge your emotions, you inhibit your ability to feel fully, making it harder to use your emotions in a positive direction. Think of it like this: every emotion you have is a useful piece of information related to something going on in your world. Without this information, you wouldn't know how to respond fully. That is why the ability to perceive emotions is a form of intelligence.
   • It can be difficult at first, but practice letting negative emotions emerge and connect it to what's happening. For example, if you feel stinging jealousy, what is that emotion telling you about the situation?
   • Fully experience positive emotions. Connect joy or satisfaction to what's around you so you can learn how to feel it more often.

5. 

   Pay attention to mechanisms in your emotions. This is a way to learn a lot about your feelings and how they relate to your experience. When you were feeling strong, ask yourself when you last felt like that. What happened before, during, and after?
   • When you see patterns, you can gain greater control over your behavior. Observe how you handled a certain situation before, and how you want to handle it next time.
   • Take note of your emotional reactions, or how you feel day in, day out, so you can clearly see how you tend to react.

6. 

   Practice deciding how to behave. You can't control your emotions, but you can decide how to react to them. If you have problems with angry criticism or shutting yourself to the outside when you are hurt, think about how you would respond. Instead of getting overwhelmed by your emotions, decide how you will react when your feelings become intense next time.
   • When something negative happens in your life, take a moment to feel your emotions. Some describe a wave of sadness or anger swarming them. Once this wave is over, decide how you want to behave. Decide to talk to your feelings instead of suppressing them, or get up and try instead of halfway through.
   • Don't look for runaway habits. It's not easy to allow bad feelings to fully emerge, and many people want to drown them by drinking like a pot, watching too much TV, or switching to pain-numbing habits. When you do this enough, your EQ will suffer.
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Part 2 of 3: Connecting with Others

1. 

   Be open and sociable. Openness and harmony go hand in hand in emotional intelligence. A narrow mindset is generally a sign of low EQ. As your mind expands through inner understanding and contemplation, it is easier to calmly and assertively resolve conflicts. You will find yourself socially conscious and new possibilities will open up to you. To reinforce this element in your EQ, try:
   • Listen to debates on television or the radio. Consider both sides of the argument, and look for subtle points that require further consideration.
   • When someone doesn't respond emotionally like you do, consider why, and try to see from their point of view.

2. 

   Improve sympathy skills. Empathy means being able to recognize how others are feeling, and to share feelings with them. Being an active listener and genuinely attentive to what others are saying can help you feel better about their feelings. When you can use that information to aid your decision-making and improve your relationships, it's a sign of emotional intelligence.
   • To improve empathy, put yourself in the shoes of others. Think how you would feel if you were in their shoes. Proactively imagine how the experience they are going through, as well as what support or concerns can alleviate their difficulties.
   • When you see someone feeling strong, ask yourself, "How would I react in the same situation?"
   • Be genuinely interested in what everyone is saying, so you can react sensitively. Instead of letting your thoughts drift, ask questions and summarize what they are saying to make sure you are in the conversation.

3. 

   Read body language. Try to understand what's behind and recognize your true feelings by observing facial expression and body language. Often people say one thing while their face shows that there is still a deeper truth. Practice observing and recognize more discreet expressions when people convey their feelings.
   • If you are unsure if you have skills in facial expression interpretation, give it a try. A higher voice indicates that someone is under stress.

4. 

   See your impact on others. Understanding the feelings of others is only half of the EQ; You also need to truly understand your impact on others. Do you tend to make people feel nervous, cheerful, or angry? How does conversation look like when you walk into the room?
   • Think about what you might need to change. If you tend to fight with loved ones, your girlfriend cries easily during conversation, or people close their hearts in your presence, you may need to change your attitude for a better emotional impact with everyone.
   • Ask trusted friends or loved ones what they think of your feelings that need improvement.
   • A person's volume can also have an impact. You may have trouble recognizing your impact on others, and they can help with this.

5. 

   Practice emotional honesty. If you say you're “okay” and your face is frowning, you are communicating dishonestly. Practice being emotionally open, so that people can understand you better. Let people know when you are upset, and share your happiness and joy.
   • Being "yourself" helps others truly understand you, and they will trust you more if they know your reasons.
   • However, understand that there is a limit: take control of your emotions and not let it hurt others.
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Part 3 of 3: Applying EQ in Reality

1. 

   Let's see where you need to improve. Having important intellectual capacity in life, but emotional intelligence is just as essential. High emotional intelligence can lead to better career relationships and opportunities. There are four core elements of emotional intelligence that can help you lead a balanced life. Read carefully and decide where you should improve, then take steps to practice those skills:
   • Self-awareness: The ability to perceive one's own true emotions and understand their origins. Self-awareness means knowing your strengths and limitations.
   • Self-control: The ability to delay pleasure, balance the needs of yourself and that of others, take initiative in being creative, and move away from impulsivity. Self-management means being able to cope with change and stay committed.
   • Social awareness: The ability to keep pace with other people's emotions and concerns, as well as the ability to notice and adapt to social cues. Social awareness means being able to see the powerful dynamics present in any group or organizational context.
   • Relationship Management: The ability to get along with others, handle conflicts, inspire and influence people, and communicate clearly.

2. 

   Lower your stress level by increasing your EQ. Stress is a generic word for feeling overwhelmed by a variety of different emotions. Life is full of difficult situations from relationship breakdowns to job loss. In between are a variety of sources of stress that can make any everyday problem more challenging than it really is. If you are under a lot of stress, it will be difficult to behave the way you want. Having a good plan for stress relief improves every aspect of your EQ.
   • Identify the source of your stress, and what can help relieve it. Make a list of effective stress relievers, like hanging out with friends or taking a walk in the park, and stick to them.
   • Get help if you need it. If stress is too overwhelming to deal with on your own, seek help from a therapist or psychiatrist who can give you the tools to deal with them (and help you increase your EQ in this progress).

3. 

   Become happier at home and at work. When you are optimistic, it becomes easier to see the beauty in life and everyday things and spread that feeling around. Optimism leads to emotional satisfaction and greater opportunities - people want to be with an optimist and this attracts them to you, with all the opportunities that more connections bring. again.
   • The negativity keeps people focused on the possibilities of mistakes, not building resilience.
   • People with high EQ tend to use humor and fun to make themselves and others feel safer and happier. Use laughter to get through tough times.
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Advice

• Don't despair - keep in mind that emotional intelligence can be improved, no matter how high or low it is, through persistent effort and a willingness to open up and change.
• If you have a high EQ, consider jobs that require frequent interactions with people, as well as jobs that involve connecting and connecting with others.
• Emotional intelligence is not just about controlling your feelings. It is also about self-control.
• Some things need to be analyzed in more detail than others.

Warning

• Having a high IQ does not guarantee high EQ.
• Open-minded thinking is not as tall as ideas like blind belief, persecution or genocide with wholesome ideas. It means understanding why someone is so scared of a group of people that it is necessary to try to get rid of them.