Content

• Steps
• Warning

Dating with a single parent can be difficult. The baby is always the top priority. You need to learn to respect it as well as support it. Clear boundaries, always sympathy, share and then, success will come to you in that relationship.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Getting Started

1. 

   Ask your best friend if you are that irresponsible person. If a serious relationship is what you are looking for, the child should always be within the range of your concerns. Dating someone who already has a baby can be challenging. So be honest with yourself: are you ready for this responsibility?
   • Children, especially young children, will always be the first priority of parents. Dates and schedules can be changed at the last minute to suit your child's schedule. You may have to give in more than ideal and accept less time with your loved one than you would like.
   • Having children from a previous relationship can always be a part of the parent's life. Unless the person is completely gone, the loved one will always maintain some connection with them. Are you comfortable with the limits between them? Do you think romantic feelings still lurk somewhere? When the relationship turns serious, you are more likely to have to meet and communicate with the ex. Consider this before considering going further with a single mom / dad.
   • When you have children, many people are very cautious in their relationships, at least in the beginning. That's because as a parent, everything becomes more important. Depression in a relationship makes it difficult for you to maintain a normal function and, therefore, affects your ability to raise and take care of children.Things will be slower when dating someone who already has children because caution is essential to them.

2. 

   
   
   Leave setting boundaries to that person. You should ask before the issue is related to the child, what limits to comply with. The ex may be very reluctant to speak up on his own and, therefore, be extremely acknowledging if you can politely ask what their expectations are for your relationship with the baby.
   • The boundaries can be very simple, such as how much time they should spend with their children. You may want both of you to understand that they can't go out on week nights or only date every two weeks. Respect and understand those limitations.
   • There is also a limit to when you can see your child. Your boyfriend / girlfriend may not communicate directly as in the scenario above - most likely they won't give an absolute answer or timeframe. Don't rush, don't ask for a referral too soon. It's important to let your partner know that you will be happy to see you whenever they are ready.

3. 

   
   
   Have a positive outlook. When dating someone who already has children, try not to take it as a burden or baggage. Let's look at the positive side of the situation.
   • When you have a baby, perhaps he or she will have a unique view of this life, a whole new perspective on you. Dating with your crush can be a fun way to open your mind and get involved in different ways of thinking. The child's presence affects how you think about work, life, or responsibilities in general. Make an effort to see this as an opportunity for you to learn and grow.
   • Although they may not be able to spend as much time together as expected, they will be very precious times. You won't take the person for granted and always find ways to make the most of your time together. Maybe in the end, two people will learn by phone and email more than meeting face-to-face, and thus can talk and exchange better. When we are not distracted by the physical world around us, our mind will be closer to each other's words.
   • Then you will realize, children's activities are also enjoyable for adults. As the relationship progresses, you may enjoy walking around fairs, amusement parks or exciting children's movies.
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Part 2 of 3: Getting to know the child

1. 

   
   
   Observe how the person interacts with their child. It's very important to feel comfortable with the other's parenting style. If you disagree with their parenting style, for whatever reason, that's not a good sign of a strong relationship.
   • Remember that when you are dating, you are part of a family. Make sure you are really comfortable with that family culture. Observe carefully and make sure there are no problems in their conduct and actions, as a family.
   • Being uncomfortable does not mean that he or she is a bad parent. However, disagreeing with their parenting pattern is also a real red flag. You may feel lost in their family. Maybe the other person values ​​things that are different from you. They may raise children with strong beliefs and you do not. Maybe the person takes your goals too seriously and is successful and you are more relaxed and free.

2. 

   Be an example of kindness and understanding. When you are not familiar, you may not know how to treat your child. The good news is you don't have to be a great mom and dad right away. Just being a strong adult role model is enough.
   • In front of the child, maintain your best attitude. Say "please" and "thank you" and use it properly. Listen when your child talks. Offer to help with some household chores, such as washing dishes after a meal or taking out trash.
   • Treat the person with kindness and respect in your child's presence. Show your child how to treat others by being kind and polite to their parents.
   • Kindness can be expressed in very small ways. Praise your child. If your children show you their work in school, show them positivity and praise them. If you have pets, be nice to them, feed them and talk to them.

3. 

   Be patient and be yourself in the first few interactions. They can sense it when you try to behave differently. Many people try to be too friendly or too cool to meet them, but end up becoming unpopular with children. Just be yourself and give your child time to get to know you.
   • Be yourself in the first meeting. You want them to know you as who you are instead of what character you have built up. While you should make sure that the language you use and the topic of conversation are right for your child, you don't need to completely change your personality.
   • Ask your child about their school, their interests, and their friends. Many feel they should learn about the things they like, but really the best and easiest way to get to know them is to talk.
   • Understand that it can be stressful to see you. That is completely normal. Children may even be rude at first with their parents' new target. Even so, make sure that any hostility is reciprocated with friendliness and patience. Understand that this is a natural part of the acquaintance phase and don't let it go.

4. 

   Be flexible. Children are always full of surprises and unpredictability. If you are a person who is not flexible, find room for tolerance. Plans may change because of a sports tournament, parent conferences or unexpected child's illness. You need to sympathize with your partner in these situations and take the time to rearrange or adjust the plan to suit what your child needs.

5. 

   Get your child involved in some activities. When it seems that your ex is comfortable with your relationship, start letting your child participate in certain activities that you do. Planning a date at the right events or outings for your child will help the person no longer have to fret as if he or she is making a choice, on the one hand being friends and the other being children.
   • It could be blowling, rollerblading or any other sport. They are great ideas for easily having a good time with your child. If there is a fair or festival in the area, suggest going there together.
   • If you like movies, consider children's movies that appeal to both you and your partner. Many of the movies that are crafted and marketed towards a child audience are also great for adults.
   • Plan at home, especially on the weekends. It may be difficult to get out on Wednesday night, so suggest going home to play. You can cook dinner or bring pizza and have a "family night" with chessboard.

6. 

   Let the relationship with your child develop naturally. Many people want to get along well with their partner's children, especially when things get more serious. Obviously this is important. However, affection cannot be forced. You need to let it happen naturally.
   • Let the person decide what speed is right for them. If your ex is just comfortable seeing their baby once or twice a month, respect that.
   • Let the person decide how to introduce you. Maybe they will say you're just a friend. Understand and don't push to be "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" when the other person is still not comfortable with those nouns.

7. 

   Never criticize the person's parenting. Don't forget that you are still not a parent. You are just a boyfriend or girlfriend only. Even if you disagree with a decision, you are not in a position to criticize or interfere. Let the other person raise their children, observe and support but not judge. advertisement

Part 3 of 3: Being serious in a relationship

1. 

   Talk to that person, talk about going further. Maybe after a while, such as a month, you want to take it one step further.This can be more complicated when standing among you as a child and therefore, it is essential to have an open communication about the future of this relationship.
   • Determine the terms and conditions of the relationship. Every relationship exists with expectations that are shaped over time. At some point, however, we should have an open conversation about what each one is expecting. How serious are you with the other party? Can you envision the future with the other person? If so, how should you promote it? If not, is it worth continuing to date?
   • With physical intimacy, a child can complicate matters. Having to wait until the child is not at home and most likely overnight is impossible. Your ex may not be comfortable with allowing you to stay overnight until you've been together for a while. Respect their wishes and limitations.

2. 

   Seriously talk about the future. If you are in a serious relationship and the subject already has children, a conversation about the future is essential. You need to know where you are in the picture of your ex's family.
   • Do you find yourself finally able to spend your life with that person? Do the two of you share the same direction in family and career issues? Are you unified in raising children? Can any great difference that exist between the two be well harmonized?
   • In the case of engagement or marriage, what role will you play in the child's life? Will you be given legal guardianship? Will children call you "Dad", "Mom" or simply aunts?
   • Meet your ex. By this point, the child's parent will want to see you. They will learn who you are because their child will spend a lot of time with you. Talk to your ex about their appointment and how you should be.

3. 

   Consider becoming a stepfather / stepmother. In the case of marriage or engagement, you will become the child's step-father / step-mother. You need to make sure you are ready to take on that responsibility.
   • Remember that the need should be above the desire. Once you are the stepfather / stepmother, you are no longer your child's friend. You need to establish rules and encourage children to work and homework, and go to bed on time.
   • You and your significant other will need to begin building a new family tradition. Once you become a stepfather / stepmother, it will be a whole new family. To help your child feel like family, include new activities such as board night, family dinner and especially games and events during the holiday season.
   • Communicate openly with the person. Most likely, the two will not always be on the same line in parenting. You should maintain an open communication throughout the time of inquiry and date so that any disagreements can be resolved smoothly.
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Warning

• If you are uncomfortable with the other person's parenting because you suspect that there are signs of child abuse, you should contact Child Protection Services.