Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 2: Managing anger in the short term
• Method 2 of 2: Long-term management of anger
• Tips
• Warnings

Everyone gets angry now and then. However, if you're experiencing overwhelming anger, it could harm your mental and physical health. Here's how to control your emotions and calm yourself.

To step

Method 1 of 2: Managing anger in the short term

1. Take a break as soon as you find yourself feeling angry. Stop what you're doing, get away from anything that's bothering you, and just take a breather. Getting away from anything troubling you will make it infinitely easier to calm you down. Try it out in these situations:
   • If you experience anger from road problems, park yourself on a secondary road and turn off your car engine.
   • If you are upset at work, move to another room or go outside for a moment. When driving to work, consider getting into your car so that you are in your own familiar space.
   • If you are upset at home, move to a room with some space (such as the bathroom) or take a walk.
   • If you are experiencing anger from problems in an unfamiliar place, don't just wander off on your own. Tell whoever you are with that you need a short mental break and ask them to go a few extra steps away from you. Close your eyes and try to imagine yourself somewhere quiet.
2. Take a deep breath. When your heart is beating with anger, slowly bring it down by controlling your breathing. Count to three as you inhale, hold your breath in your lungs for another three seconds and count to three again as you exhale. Concentrate only on the numbers when you do this and refuse to think about what makes you angry. Repeat this as often as necessary.
3. Go to one happy place. If you are still having a hard time calming down, picture yourself in a scene that you find incredibly relaxing. It could be your childhood backyard, a quiet forest, a deserted island - whatever it is that gives you a sense of peace and being at home. Concentrate on imagining every detail of this place: the light, the sounds, the temperature, the weather, the smells. Stay in your happy place until you are completely immersed in it and hang around for a few minutes or until you feel calm.
4. And if it still doesn't work, if you can, remember the best time you spent and every happy situation. It can be with your mom, friends or your partner. Try to bring a smile to your face by remembering such events.
5. Practice positive self-talk. When you're ready discuss the situation with yourself in soothing and positive terms. For example, if you are experiencing traffic anger, you could try, “That guy almost pushed me off the road, but maybe he experienced an emergency and I probably never have to see him again. I am lucky to be alive and my car is undamaged. I am lucky that I can still drive a car. I can stay calm and focused when I get back on the road. "
   • If you find some form of positive self-talk that works for you, make it a mantra. Repeat it for yourself as many times as necessary to get back to the right frame of mind.
6. Ask for support from someone you trust. If you're still upset, sharing your concerns with a close friend or confidant might help.
   • State clearly what you want from the other person. If you just want a listening ear, say at the outset that you don't want help or advice, just sympathy. If you're looking for a solution, tell the other person that too.
   • Set a time limit. Give yourself a certain amount of time to take out what is making you angry and hold on to it - when the time is up, your raging is over. This will help you move on rather than dwelling on the situation endlessly.
7. Try to see some humor in what made you angry. After you have calmed down and determined that you are ready to get over the incident, try to see the brighter side of it. Putting the incident in a humorous light can help you maintain your positivity and help you avoid getting angry about the same situation the next time.

Method 2 of 2: Long-term management of anger

1. Do physical activity. The endorphins that come from exercise can help calm you, and moving your body provides a physical outlet for your anger. Try these activities that you can practice on your own:
   • Running
   • Weightlifting
   • Bicycles
   • Yoga
   • Basketball
   • Combat sports
   • Swimming
   • Netball
2. Restructure the way you think about your life. Cognitive habits are the hardest to break, but it can be done. Ask yourself honestly if you see everyone and everything as an opponent or an obstacle. Chances are, the world isn't for real so is - but you think so, whether due to paranoia or past experiences. Try these tips for changing your worldview:
   • When you wake up in the morning, you resolve to greet each person or experience as if it were all brand new to you. Sand your prejudices and give everything a fresh start.
   • If you find yourself falling into the same bad thoughts, say out loud, "Stop". Consciously change your way of thinking into something else.
   • Try out different points of view. Rather than focusing solely on how you were affected by a situation, ask yourself how it affected the other people involved. Think about the challenges they face and how they respond to them.
3. Keep a journal of what makes you angry and how you plan to fix it. Whenever you are really angry, write down what exactly happened. (It's important to be honest, even if it puts you in an unfavorable light - remember a journal is meant to keep things private.) Next, plan how you're going to fix the problem and avoid doing it again next time. If you find yourself in the same troubling situation, check your journal entries to see what else you can do.
4. Visit a mental health professional. If your anger has reached a point where it interferes with your daily life or your ability to maintain positive relationships, see a doctor. He or she can assess the core of your problem and determine whether or not you need therapy, medications, or a combination of both.
   • Realize that depression, even when diagnosed by a professional, can be rooted in anger and the frustration of when it cannot or is not resolved. Because anger in most cases has to be suppressed to ensure that it does not harm oneself and others, as its source has caused shame and humiliation or because one is boiling with anger when it cannot be expressed and pushed into the unconscious , the unresolved fester can cause depression or hostility, when the real problem may actually be that they are simply unaware of someone's standards. Of course, caution is advised in the event of possible violence.

Tips

• Walk away and try to let go of any negative emotions. Going outside can help a lot.
• Get some exercise and get away from the person annoying you!
• Pay attention to what you say when you are angry. You don't always feel the same when you've calmed down and thought about the situation.
• Recognize that anger is sometimes justified and must be expressed. However, realize that there are other productive ways to do it, instead of lashing out at others.
• Think about the stress you are putting on yourself. Do you like to feel that way? If not, change it.
• Try to think about things you are grateful for. The more specific the better. You cannot be really angry and grateful at the same time.
• Find a creative outlet, such as writing, drawing, etc., in which you can use your energy. Hobbies help lift your mood and allow you to channel your energy where you would otherwise dwell on issues you cannot resolve. Imagine what you could do with the energy you normally expend in anger if you channel it into something else.
• Ask yourself if the future recipient of your anger deserves to be attacked or if you are just using them as punching bags to let off steam for another person / problem that is bothering you.
• Drink something you like to help calm you down.
• Sometimes it is better to write a letter instead of talking directly to the person.
• Write a letter or message someone about how you feel, but DO NOT SEND IT. By the time you are done expressing your feelings, your anger will most likely be gone.

Warnings

• If at any point you are considering harming yourself or others, seek help immediately.
• Walk away immediately if you realize that you are allowing your anger to be turned into anger or that you are becoming violent.
• Anger is never an excuse to attack or abuse people around you (physically or verbally). You could be sent to prison for it.
• Understand that anger is a natural emotion. It's what we do with that anger that damages our health, our relationships, and the perception others have of us.