Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 3: Consider your boyfriend
• Method 2 of 3: Offer words of encouragement
• Method 3 of 3: Strengthen your bond

When you're in a relationship with a guy, you want him to feel good about himself and be happy to be with you. You can do that by treating your boyfriend with respect and paying attention. Start by talking to him about if he has any ideas about how you can be a better partner. Then help him by word and deed to feel more nurtured and supported in the relationship.

To step

Method 1 of 3: Consider your boyfriend

1. Ask your boyfriend for suggestions. The best source for clues to this is your boyfriend himself. Ask him candidly how you can be a better partner.
   • You could say something like, "I want to be a better partner for you." Do you have any suggestions on how I can do that? "
   • Make notes of what he says and try to make changes as needed. Make changes that are realistic - you really can't become a completely different person.
2. Be an active listener. Partners like to be heard, so actively practice listening when talking to boyfriend. Instead of thinking about what you want to say, concentrate fully on his words.
   • Let him finish what he says and then try to repeat it in your own words.
   • Improving your listening skills is in itself a solution to becoming a better partner. But listening carefully also helps you notice when he's trying to communicate how he wants to be treated.
3. Think about his feelings. We are all constructed in such a way that we think about ourselves first, but take time to think about how your boyfriend feels in certain situations. Try to stand in his shoes for a moment. By doing this you learn to understand him better and to give an appropriate response.
   • For example, say your boyfriend is upset about a bad score on a test - how would you feel in his place.What would you want him to do for you if the same thing happened to you?
   • Good partners are considerate, which means they show empathy.
4. Establish a pattern for giving and taking space. Being together all the time is just not realistic or healthy for a relationship. Let your boyfriend have time for himself (and that includes you).
   • Decide in advance how you will give and take space so that neither partner feels hurt by the other's need to isolate themselves. It may be enough to say something like, "I need a moment for myself" or "I want to be alone with my thoughts for a moment?"
   • In addition to taking up space at certain moments that arise, you should also maintain a routine to spend time alone, to pursue separate interests, or to hang out with your own friends and family.
   • Don't feel bad about spending time alone. Healthy relationships are always accompanied by moments like this, where everyone needs time for themselves.
5. Take care of yourself. Take the time to give your boyfriend a little something extra through self-care, healthy eating, exercise, plenty of rest, and scheduling "time for yourself" every week.
   • If you take good care of yourself, you will be in a better position to improve yourself as a partner.

Method 2 of 3: Offer words of encouragement

1. Compliment your boyfriend regularly. Tell your boyfriend what you like about him as often as you can. Praise serves two purposes: it helps him feel good about himself and it also reinforces positive behavior.
   • Choose different areas to focus on each time you compliment him: his looks, abilities, ideas, his interactions with others, etc.
   • Always make sure your compliments are genuine. Don't overdo it or say things you don't actually mean.
2. Make sure he hears when you talk positively about him to others. In addition to saying nice things to your boyfriend about himself, be complimentary to others about him. Let your sister know how he helped you study for a physics test or tell your best friend how much you love your boyfriend.
   • Hearing these positive words (either directly or through) will make your boyfriend feel good about himself and his relationship with you.
3. Support his goals. Does your boyfriend know that you are his biggest fan? Show him that by applauding him in his efforts. This could be something like telling him that he will be a great doctor someday (if he studies that) or by being there when he has a performance.
4. Show genuine appreciation. "Thank you" is often underestimated in relationships, so take the time to let your boyfriend know you appreciate him. For example, thank him if he helped you lug boxes, or if you appreciate that your friend is always there for you.
5. Tell him how much you care about him. Reassure your boyfriend often. Don't assume he knows you care about him; but tell him.
   • Say something like, "I wouldn't know what to do without you" or "I love you so much" (if that's true).

Method 3 of 3: Strengthen your bond

1. Show interest in his passions. Improve contact with your boyfriend through his interests. For example, if he loves a certain TV show, watch it with him. If he likes a particular band, buy tickets to a concert.
   • It's okay to have different interests, but sharing that or at least being interested in what's important to him will bring you closer together.
2. Make time for him. Time for the two of you is essential to healthy relationships, so make sure you make time for it. While it's okay to make time for yourself and others, your boyfriend shouldn't always feel like he comes last.
   • Each week, both of you pick up the agenda to make time for just the two of you.
3. Make personal disclosures. Your boyfriend will feel important if you regularly share your thoughts, feelings, ideas, and experiences with him. With this you also forge a deeper bond between each other.
   • For example, tell him if you are concerned that you will not be hired for the job you want, or how frustrated you are with your relationship with your father.
   • If you open up, it is more likely that your boyfriend will too.
   • Slightly reveal more about how close (and serious) you are. Start small and work your way up.
4. Orphan reliable. Romantic relationships are based on trust. Show your boyfriend that you are trustworthy by not betraying his trust when he tells you something that should be kept private, by keeping your word and being a reliable partner.