Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 3: Speak politely
• Part 2 of 3: Viewed from the other person
• Part 3 of 3: Use appropriate body language
• Tips
• Warnings

Politeness is essential in much of social interaction. Whether you are meeting someone for the first time or having a friendly relationship with someone you have known all your life; there is little benefit to be gained from appearing rude. Unfortunately, the fact remains that many rudenesses are not meant to be and are the result of misunderstandings and a lack of self-awareness. Being polite is one thing. Not being rude is another. If you find yourself in a situation where you've given someone the wrong impression, it's a good thing you can do something about bad social habits. Being aware of the way you present yourself is the first step to improve that.

To step

Part 1 of 3: Speak politely

1. Think before you speak. A lot of problems can be avoided if you just think a little more carefully. A truly gifted talker will always try to filter what he is saying before finally saying it. While thinking ahead of time about everything you're going to say may sound exhausting to some, it doesn't require much brain power. Really, all you usually need is a split second to see if something you want to say can have a negative impact on the people around you. If you have a bad feeling about something you want to say, it is best not to open your mouth for the time being.
2. Monitor your intonation. It can help to be aware of how your voice sounds when you speak. While it can be distracting to focus on yourself when trying to have a conversation, casually keeping an eye on your tone, the speed and volume of your voice can do a lot to avoid inadvertent rudeness.
   • Pay particular attention to the speed of your words. People who are nervous or uncomfortable tend to speed up their speech when under pressure. Unfortunately, this only adds to their clumsiness.
3. Let your empathy resonate in your conversation. You can benefit greatly from empathy during a conversation. Being considered a polite and considerate person is not the least of all benefits. Empathy is something that almost everyone has to some degree. The key to getting it out is to take a genuine interest in what the other person is saying. When someone tells you about their life, make a real effort to see things from their point of view. For example, if he recently lost his job, try to imagine what that would feel like. Empathetic people are in harmony with the other person's feelings and it is easier for them to win others over in that regard.
   • Empathy also works well with less pleasant interactions. It can be frustrating talking to someone who is aggressive or mean. While it is all too easy to fall out with such a person, you can make yourself more comfortable by staying calm with empathy. Try to view the situation from the eyes of the unpleasant person. In some cases it is possible to get a different view of the matter when you step outside your own perspective for a moment.
4. Ignore gossip. Gossip is a quick route to rude behavior. Nobody likes to be talked about. Even though the person is not around, many people take offense when others they know are portrayed in a negative light. If you want to avoid rude behavior by yourself, stay away from such interactions. Even if it is other people who are gossiping, it is still better to make it clear that you are not served. The people who attend and see you reject the prospect of the gossip will rate you higher as a result.
5. Stay humble. Modesty is a virtue for almost all polite people. Some people are rude for being too self-centered. This is usually a harmless mistake, but one that is easy to avoid by looking at the conversation from both angles.
6. Let the other person do the talking. Even if everything you say is gold, you can still come across as rude if you don't bother listening to the other person's story. In general, people like to give their opinion about something. They feel limited when they cannot get a word in between. Listening is as much a skill as any other.If you don't want to be rude, then you will have to master listening.
   • Active listening consists of a wide variety of responses that let the other person know that you are giving them your full attention. This can be evident from your body language, such as nodding, or through verbal responses such as summarizing the gist of what the other person has said.

Part 2 of 3: Viewed from the other person

1. Learn about etiquette. The established rules of etiquette or expected courtesy depend on the type of people you associate with. When all else hasn't helped, it's a good idea to learn more about proper etiquette. Although the idea of ​​"proper etiquette" is often associated with the (old-fashioned) Victorian period, many of these practices are still useful today. If you are a little unsure about this, it is better to follow a usage than to ignore it. Politeness is no less important today than it was then, and there are new rules that must be obeyed in modern times.
   • In general, it is better to keep your phone out of sight when talking to someone.
   • Give the other person plenty of time to speak.
   • Try to be absorbed in what the other has to say. Even if you are not really interested in what the other person has to say, it is better not to show it.
   • Never forget to say please and thank you. These tricks have not become less important over the years.
2. Consider the other person's sensitivities. Being polite is all the more challenging when talking to someone who is naturally sensitive. Emotional sensitivity could be considered a good thing in most cases, but it can be difficult when talking to someone who feels hurt by the slightest thing. If you feel like this is the case with someone, it is a good thing to know their personal preferences before engaging in an extensive conversation with them. For example, if you expect someone likely to dislike plain humor, it is better to keep this to you until they are no longer around.
   • Obtaining information about someone prior to a conversation can give you the edge you need in a conversation when politeness can become an issue. Ask about their preferences or emotional triggers. That aside, it is always helpful to see how someone communicates in a social situation before interacting with that person yourself.
3. Pulse how the other person is feeling. Even if this doesn't require direct action on your part, a lot of rude behavior during a conversation can be avoided through empathy and knowing how the other person is feeling. Since people can be tricky in this area, your best option is to try and find out how the other person is feeling through non-verbal communication. Make it a habit to pay attention to someone's facial expression while they are talking. Sometimes what they say will not match the mood their expression alludes to.
   • Unfortunately, most people will not give a sincere answer to the question, "How are you feeling." Some people are not used to expressing their feelings accurately. Others may feel embarrassed or may not want to express their true feelings.
4. Consider the culture from which someone comes. Much of what we consider rude is determined by the culture in which we were raised. If you plan to travel or interact with people from other cultures on a regular basis, it is a good idea to gain a thorough understanding of what is and is not appropriate in their eyes. While people are usually accustomed to looking beyond these cultural differences, the simple act of gaining prior knowledge of these customs will be considered a very polite gesture.
5. Adapt to your environment. As with most social interactions, your behavior should depend on the situation you are in. In other words, the way you show respect and courtesy will be different depending on whether you are at a wedding, funeral, or casual night out. Politeness means being aware of yourself and acting tactfully. Being cheerful during a funeral vigil will evoke the same negative reactions as a depressed attitude at a birthday party.
   • This also applies to your clothing and appearance. People will largely judge you based on your appearance.
   • If you are ever in doubt about how to behave in a particular social setting, it is a good idea to try to copy what other people generally do.
6. Make sure your politeness is consistent. If you really want to come across as a polite and tactful person, you can't rely on short-lived politeness. Politeness is not an act. On the contrary, it should be a constant state of mind. Make sure your behavior is consistent. If someone sees two different sides of you, you will come across as a charlatan all the more.

Part 3 of 3: Use appropriate body language

1. Mirror the other person's facial expression. In some cases, you are not sure how to act or respond to another person. By mirroring the other person's facial expression, you indicate that you are aligned. In most cases this will be positively received.
   • It is not recommended to impersonate the other person if you suspect they are being sarcastic.
2. Take care of your personal hygiene. Even the most kind-hearted person can appear rude if the basics are not followed. This includes showering at least a few times a week and making sure your clothes are freshly washed. If you always have a rancid smell around you, you probably won't be able to make friends easily and people will irrevocably dislike you. Something so simple can make a world of difference in terms of politeness.
3. Avoid blinking your eyes too often. Some people tend to blink quickly when under stress. When noticed, it can give the impression that you feel uncomfortable or rushed. Since this is involuntary, it can be difficult to unlearn or even notice that you are doing this. The next time you're in a slightly stressful situation, try to be aware of how you're blinking.
   • This and other facets of negative body language can be reduced by consciously relaxing yourself.
4. Be extra aware of your body language when you are stressed. Body language is usually expressed without thinking. When we are tense, this can often be seen in the way we hold our body. Even if we otherwise find it particularly important to appear as polite as possible, this kind of roughness can seep through. The best way to control it is to emphasize paying attention to your own body language. Crossed arms and an aggressive posture can appear natural, but focusing on the way your body responds can help prevent these stress signals from appearing.

Tips

• It's a good idea to tailor your approach depending on who you're talking to at the time.
• When in doubt, it is best to imitate the other person.
• As always, eat with your mouth closed. This is good advice to take into account wherever you are.

Warnings

• No matter what you do, it is never entirely certain that you will always be able to charm everyone. Embrace the good and accept the bad, and know when to pick eggs for your buck when the going gets tough.