Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 3: Understanding and invalidating a negative self-image
• Part 2 of 3: Finding a guy who values ​​you
• Part 3 of 3: Courting someone special
• Warnings

You are more beautiful than you think! However, it is quite common that you sometimes do not experience it that way. In a world saturated with unnaturally perfect models used to sell everything from junk food to cars, your opinion of yourself can become dangerously low. You might be surprised to learn that even women you find attractive struggle with certain aspects of their image, and this self-doubt can push people away and make dating impossible. If you want to rise above those feelings of being unattractive and get a boyfriend, then you need to learn more about what self-esteem is and put yourself in the right environment to find a guy lucky enough to be with you - then it's just a matter of bringing in your catch.

To step

Part 1 of 3: Understanding and invalidating a negative self-image

1. Recognize a negative body image so that you are able to do something about it. Your body image is the way you view and judge your appearance. When you have a positive body image, you generally have an accurate and satisfied image of yourself, which makes you feel good about the person you are. This doesn't mean that you are always positive about your physical self, or that there aren't things like your weight or skin tone that can't be improved through healthy choices. A positive self-image instead gives you the power of your own goodness and worth as a human being. You are indeed important and you do have a significant impact on the lives of your friends and family.
   • You can recognize a negative body image by the following:
     1) An unrealistic view of your body shape. There is nothing wrong with being round or slender, but there is well something wrong with thinking that your natural shape is not good enough.
     2) Feelings of failure that stem from your perceived shape or size. Even if you eat healthier or exercise more regularly, your body characteristics do not reflect your worth as a person. Self-esteem comes from within.
     3) Feelings of shame or strong insecurity about your body. Being a little shy is normal. An anxiety attack or other physical fear response is likely a sign of a negative body image.
     4) Not feeling good about yourself. Being too busy with yourself can lead to overthinking even simple movements, making them seem unnatural to you.
2. Identify and examine causes that contribute to your poor self-esteem. There may be something noticeable that has made it difficult for you to love your body, such as a birthmark or a scar, or there may be several minor features that you just don't like about yourself, such as your nose or the shape of your ears. In some cases, the problem is not physical, but it could be the result of emotional abuse, such as someone telling you that you are overweight, even though you are healthy. It can be difficult to confront these demons, but only through acceptance can you move forward, learn to love yourself, and accept the love of others.
   • Try to find a characteristic of yourself that you don't like but admire in someone close to you. A good place to look for this is your family life. By being able to identify a characteristic of yourself in a favorite family member, such as your aunt, your mother, etc., you can counteract negative thoughts by saying to yourself, 'I think Mom is beautiful, and people compare me all the time with her. I am much more beautiful than I realize. "
   • Coach yourself to accept any perceived physical shortcomings as part of being human. Replace your criticism with words of kindness and reassurance. You are not responsible for that birthmark on your cheek, but you are responsible for your feelings and how you treat yourself. You're not a loser, a freak, or a horrible thing. You are unique. That makes you special.
3. Resist unrealistic images in the media. The people you see in ads and on TV every day are not an accurate representation of real people. Most importantly, what someone else looks like shouldn't affect how "you" feel about yourself. Appearance is temporary and "perfection" can, in many cases, look like counterfeit and fake. Idealizing an unrealistic measure can be the cause of a self-image problem. Fight these feelings by regularly reminding yourself that many of the women in the media represent a very small percentage of the population - it's unrealistic to try to be like them!
   • When you find yourself comparing your physical features to those in the media, resist those thoughts! Say to yourself, "Me." am beautiful and these women do not represent the healthy standard that everyone can achieve. "This reinforces a healthier mindset, which can help you with depression and anxiety, both of which can hurt your attractiveness.
   • You could spend thousands of dollars, if not more, on beauty products and treatments. But even the most radical makeovers, if you're unhappy with yourself, won't change that feeling.
4. Work on your confidence and healthy relationships to become more attractive. Self-confidence has long been identified as an important part of attraction and going out, and relaxation will make you more attractive. To build your confidence and maintain healthy relationships, try the following:
   • Dress lovingly in your favorite styles. Some styles will suit you better than others. Take the time to research different styles and find the one that suits you best!
   • Show your most tidy self in your everyday life by looking your best. Accentuating your best features and nourishing your body with healthy alternatives, such as a balanced diet, will help you look and feel better.
   • Work to support others and allow friends and family to support you. Imbalanced relationships can lead to resentment, and this can lead to what is called a "toxic relationship". These types of relationships can lower your self-esteem and drain you emotionally, making you feel less attractive, which affects your appearance.
5. Make healthy changes to improve your self-image. While your self-esteem shouldn't come from a change in your appearance, taking steps to improve your health will make you feel a greater sense of connection to your body, a sense of personal fulfillment, an improvement in your mood, a better sense of self-esteem. skin and a more positive attitude. While you may want to transform overnight, suddenly completely changing your diet or how much exercise you get will rarely have an effect that lasts. Instead, do the following:
   • Identify your unhealthy habits and get rid of them gradually. Sugary foods and drinks that are low in nutrients, such as soft drinks and sweets, can be eliminated from your diet and have a dramatic positive effect on your physical health. Consult your doctor or a nutritionist for more ideas on how to improve your diet.
   • Provide your skin with moisture and nutrition. Dry or poorly cared for skin can leave you looking tired and looking less than your best. But there are many techniques you can use to make your skin radiant and healthy.
   • Get plenty of sleep. Sleep deprivation can have many negative health consequences, such as poor performance / absence, poor quality of life, high blood pressure, stroke, obesity, etc. Improve your overall health and appearance by having a beauty sleep more often.
   • Get used to an exercise routine. No one has ever jumped off the couch to run a marathon without at least training a little bit first! If one of your specific goals is to be able to run two kilometers without stopping, start walking. For example, walk a kilometer every other day for two weeks. For the next two weeks you can walk / run that distance, stopping when necessary. In this way, slowly work your way up to a fixed training routine.

Part 2 of 3: Finding a guy who values ​​you

1. Put yourself in the right environment. You certainly won't find the right one by watching Netflix night after night on the couch! Try to get involved in social activities that in some way appeal to your personal interests or hobbies. This way you will really enjoy going out and you can expect the people you meet at these events to have the same interests as you. Shared interests are an important part of most strong relationships.
   • Use online resources, such as meetup.com or citysocializer.com, to find people in your area with similar interests who are reaching out. These types of sites provide a public space where you can meet guys you wouldn't meet otherwise.
   • Check your city's local events calendar in your community center, or do a general online search using keywords like "go out, do in…". This should give you a general idea of ​​festivals, art shows, and other local events you might like.
   • You can also search for local clubs, classes offered in community centers, or join an association. Some clubs, classes or sports that you may find worthwhile in your search for the right man include book clubs, board game groups, choirs, political functions, creative writing classes, art classes, cooking classes, improv classes, volleyball, football, handball, etc .!
2. Do something different than you are used to. By going outside the box, trying something new and meeting new people, you give yourself the opportunity to get the best out of yourself. When you step out of your comfort zone a bit, you experience a kind of positive fear that improves your productivity, helps you deal with change, and encourages you to push your limits. Any of these qualities could very well impress and convince potential boyfriends.
   • Try a new approach to an everyday situation. This can be as simple as trying a new route to work. The key here is to put yourself in a situation where you have a different perspective than usual.
   • Make small changes and gradually work your way up to trying things that are significantly new and different. Putting too much pressure on yourself can cause too much anxiety, which can make you paralyzed or feel overwhelmed. Start small and work your way up to bigger changes.
3. Know what you're worth. Feeling unattractive can lead you to accept a relationship with someone who doesn't value you for who you are. Being in a relationship is no more important than your own emotional and mental health. You are worthy of a friend who respects and loves you for who you are. Don't settle for less.
   • If a friend you would like to be in a relationship with is pressuring you to do things you don't want to do without regard to your feelings, makes you sad or scared about the relationship, or asking for most of your time and investing energy in him, your relationship may be more harmful than healthy. These could be indications that you are in a relationship with him not must pursue.

Part 3 of 3: Courting someone special

1. Maintain eye contact. This can be difficult, especially if you have butterflies in your stomach because of the nerves! However, eye contact is a universal sign to indicate your interest in someone, so try not to look away when you and he are looking at each other.
   • Eye contact can also make you appear more attractive and lovable. By looking deep into his eyes, you increase your chances of winning him over.
   • You could tempt him into long-term eye contact with a simple trick. For example, you can touch his arm and ask him to look at you. Look deep into his eyes. After a few moments, ask him if he wears contact lenses, even if you know he doesn't. In this way, making eye contact is less difficult.
2. Set the right mood with lighting. Dilated pupils are an unconscious indicator that you are interested in him and vice versa. Choose a place with dim light to meet a nice guy you want to go out with, such as a cafe, planetarium, or movie theater.
   • Even if you've invited him over to something harmless, like studying for a test, watching a movie with friends, or a similar activity, dim the lights or use the soft lighting of a lamp instead of bright ceiling lights.
3. If it is not inappropriate, touch him. When you touch him, his brain naturally releases a chemical called oxytocin, also known as the love hormone. In addition, oxytocin is important for social bonding and building trust. At first, aim for a harmless touch on his arm or shoulder, but as the two of you get to know each other, touch him a little longer.
   • If you don't feel comfortable with overt touches as you get to know him better, you can always sit next to him instead of on the other side of a table. In this way, your arms and thighs touch, producing oxytocin and perhaps even romance.
4. Smile. When you smile at him, you signal to him that you like the time you spend with him. This stimulates a reward response in his brain, making him want to please you even more!
   • You can practice your comedy skills so the two of you can smile and laugh together. He may want to spend more time around you if he finds you funny, which can develop into a relationship.
   • A natural way for both of you to laugh is to suggest watching a comedy in the cinema. If you're not sure if you're interested in him romantically, you can go with several friends - just sit next to him and talk to each other every now and then.

Warnings

• If you find yourself unable to get rid of the idea that you are unattractive and constantly base your self-esteem on your appearance, this could indicate a more serious problem. In these cases, it may be wise to speak with a mental health professional, such as a counselor, therapist, or psychologist.