Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 3: Choosing the right opportunity
• Part 2 of 3: Evaluate whether a date is a good idea
• Part 3 of 3: Casually asking a colleague out
• Tips
• Warnings

It can be difficult to ask a colleague out for a date. You don't want to be too direct, but you do want to show him or her that you are interested. You don't want things to get tricky at work either, but the urge to ask that one person out can set you on fire. The fact is relationships between colleagues within a business environment are very common, and generally accepted. As long as you are polite and respectful when you ask your coworker, and as long as both of you can keep the working relationship professional, you don't have to worry. However, it is always a good idea to check your employee handbook or consult a workforce representative if there is a policy on hanging out with colleagues so that you can avoid potential problems in the future.

To step

Part 1 of 3: Choosing the right opportunity

1. Find out if your colleague is single. Before approaching your coworker for a date, make sure he or she is actually single. This can save you a lot of time and shame and it can keep your working relationship untouched.
   • If you are friends with your co-worker, you can check on his or her social media if there is already a love partner.
   • Some social media platforms such as Facebook have a special profile line for someone's relationship status. You can also scroll through some recent photos of your coworkers to see if there are any photos of your coworker holding or hugging someone's hand, which could indicate a relationship.
   • If you have a trusted friend at work, you can ask him or her about the colleague you are interested in. Ask your friend to be discreet and just say something like, "I was thinking about asking _______ out; do you know if he / she is single ?.
   • If none of these options are available to you, you can always ask your colleague yourself. Just proceed with caution and try to bring it up in conversation.
   • For example, you could say something like, "That sounds like a nice plan for this weekend. Are you going with your boyfriend (or girlfriend), or alone? ". If your coworker is single, he or she may say something like, "No, I don't see anyone. I'm just going alone. "
2. Make sure you look and feel your best that day. If you know your coworker is single and you've decided to ask him or her out, make sure you look your best and feel confident that day. That morning, do something that will either help you relax or make you positive, depending on your personality. You also need to make sure you feel confident by dressing for success.
   • Wear your most flattering outfit. Make sure that outfit is appropriate for the workplace.
   • Consider a few days before you decide to ask your co-worker to get your hair cut. That way you look freshly groomed and make a good impression.
   • Make sure you shower that day and wear deodorant and clean clothes. Spend some extra time grooming yourself so that your hair, facial hair (if you have one) and makeup (if you wear it) are perfect.
   • Check your mouth in the mirror to make sure there is no food between your teeth. Rinse with mouthwash or take a peppermint shortly before approaching your colleague so that your breath is fresh and minty.
3. Approach your colleague in a suitable place. Where and how you ask your colleague out are very important factors to take into account. Even if your coworker is interested in you, he or she may have doubts or insecurities about approaching you, so asking your coworker out in the wrong place, time, or context that is awkward, tension, or even cause hostility.
   • Go to your colleague if they are alone. If there are others around, your coworker may feel uncomfortable or pressured to say yes or no.
   • Choose a comfortable space where you and your colleague will both feel safe. Don't ask your coworker right outside the toilet, for example, or in your office (if you have one), as these locations can be intimidating or even downright inappropriate for asking someone out.
   • A good place to ask could be a neutral workspace, such as by the copier in an office or when both of you are behind the counter, such as when working in a restaurant.
   • Make sure your coworker doesn't leave too soon to do something important, because you want his or her full attention when you ask.
4. Be yourself. When talking to your coworker, it is important that you behave as you normally would. If you are nervous, your colleague will notice. And if you take on a role, your coworker will certainly be aware of it and likely won't appreciate it. Just keep calm and always respect your coworker.
5. Ask your colleague out. The hardest part is actually asking the colleague out. It can be very intimidating, but keep in mind that you don't have much to lose in the end. The worst that can happen is that your coworker can politely reject you, in which case you can just smile and politely apologize.
   • Be polite and cordial when you ask. Don't be pushy or needy, or act uninterested.
   • First, have a chat so it doesn't seem like you're in a hurry to ask him / her out. Ask your colleague how he or she is doing, how it was over the weekend and how his or her day is going.
   • Then move smoothly into asking your colleague out. You could say something like, "Hey, I really enjoyed talking to you. Shall we talk over coffee somewhere this weekend, when you are free? "
   • If your coworker says yes, say, "Great! When would it be a good time? "If your coworker says no, be polite and friendly, but don't hang around or make it uncomfortable.
6. Know when to stop. If you've asked your colleague and he or she isn't interested, then you should leave it at that. Repeatedly asking a co-worker who has already told you that he or she is not interested in dating you can be viewed as a hostile work environment, which could eventually lead to your dismissal. Remember, if your coworker isn't interested in you, there are bound to be plenty of other people who would love to go out with you. It's not worth your time and effort to bother your coworker if he / she isn't interested, and you could lose your job because of it.
   • If your coworker says no, be as polite and respectful as possible.
   • Say something to ease tensions, such as: "No problem. Well, I hope you have a good weekend. "
   • Excuse yourself and walk away. Talking for longer can make it uncomfortable for both of you.
   • Be polite and courteous to that co-worker, but make sure you never flirt or show a romantic interest with him / her now that you know he or she is not interested.

Part 2 of 3: Evaluate whether a date is a good idea

1. Assess whether there is a balance of power. The main situation where dating a co-worker is a bad idea (actually the only reason in many workplaces) is if one of you is in a position of power. Hanging out with your boss, manager, or supervisor can do you unfair favors at work. Also, dating an employee (if you're the manager) can create a situation where your employee feels pressured to date you and it can be uncomfortable or unsafe to quit if the relationship isn't working.
   • Only date someone who is on the same level. As long as there is no balance of power between the two of you, you should be able to go out safely (as long as your work policies allow it).
   • Even if you are equals, there is always a chance that one of you will be promoted in the future. That promotion, while great for your career, can drastically change the nature of your relationship at work.
2. Know workplace policies for hanging out with colleagues. Many offices have specific guidelines, rules, or even prohibitions regarding work relationships.Before taking things to the next level, it's important to know if your employer will allow it, because you don't want to risk either or both of you getting fired.
   • Some workplaces require that you pass on any romances in the workplace to your supervisor. Others may have even stricter policies.
   • You may need to communicate the nature of your new relationship in writing, which can be difficult if both of you are still exploring and have not yet "labeled" it.
   • Be aware that if your relationship has the potential to compromise your productivity, you could both be fired if the relationship makes your workplace behavior unprofessional.
   • Check the rules of your employer (usually you will be given these when you are hired or they are online). If you do not have such regulations, ask someone who works in human resources or has a similar position about the policy in the workplace.
   • Remember that even if romance is allowed in the workplace, you can get into serious trouble for public displays of affection, flirting in the workplace, using terms of endearment at work, or giving your partner preferential treatment.
3. Consider whether you and your colleague work closely together. Even if you and your coworker are equals, there is still a risk of a bad professional relationship if things don't go well. If both of you are able to handle it in an adult way, then you're fine. However, if you work closely together, things can get complicated when you eventually break up.
   • Ask yourself honestly if you and your coworker can continue to work together if you break up.
   • A good way to measure this is to think back to your most recent messy fracture. Could you and your ex sit down at a table to work on a project?
   • If you think you can't handle working with your coworker after a potential breakup, then it may be best not to date each other at all.
   • If you think both of you can handle it as an adult, then you should go for it and ask your coworker out.
4. Think about what can happen if it doesn't work. Even if you don't have to collaborate or work closely together, a messy breakup can still affect your job performance. It can be difficult to see each other at work every day, especially if one of you still has feelings for the other. This doesn't mean that it wouldn't necessarily work if you and your coworker had a relationship; it just means that you should consider all possible outcomes before proceeding.
   • Your performance may decline if one or both of you feel uncomfortable working together.
   • One of you may eventually feel compelled to leave the department or company.
   • If you are already friends with your co-worker and are thinking about asking him / her out, you may want to have a serious conversation with him / her about what both of you would do if you were pressured by your boss to end the relationship. to end. Have a plan in advance that you both agree on.

Part 3 of 3: Casually asking a colleague out

1. Know what you are going to ask in advance. Don't try to make it up on the spot. If you approach your colleague, whether he / she is interested or not or not, giving vague or unclear plans will not convince the other. Keep it casual, but know what you have in mind before asking your coworker to go out together.
   • If you're not sure yet if your coworker is interested in you, he / she is more likely to agree if you ask him / her about something ordinary than for a formal dinner or a movie.
   • Decide in advance what you want to do - for example, have a coffee, or maybe have a drink after work (if you are both old enough to do so).
   • If you ask your colleague out, ask them to go out to any informal event you have planned.
   • Instead of starting with something vague like "Would you like to go out with me," say something like, "I'd really like to continue chatting over coffee or maybe a drink when you're free."
2. Invite your colleague to a social event that you are going to do. If you are afraid of taking your coworker off your feet, you can casually ask him or her to join you in something you were already planning to do. Just make sure it's something appropriate, like going to a concert or a street festival.
   • The advantage of asking someone out in this way is that it often comes up naturally in a conversation.
   • If you have a chat with your coworker, he or she will likely ask you what your plans are for the weekend at some point. This is the perfect opportunity to describe your plans and then invite your colleague.
   • You could say something like, "I plan to go to that concert on Saturday. I have an extra ticket - if you feel like coming ...?
3. Make it a friendly "match" to come up with ideas for an outing. A friendly match in this case means that you see who comes up with the best idea for a first outing. This method of asking a coworker out will work best if you and your coworker are already on good terms and have regular friendly chat. The goal, again, is to keep it casual and not make your coworker feel uncomfortable.
   • This method will only work if you and your co-worker are already flirting and it is clear that both of you are interested in each other.
   • Try to let the subject come out naturally. This can be a tricky step, and the timing and execution must be perfect or it can appear scary and drive the other person away.
   • If someone in the workplace is talking about a recent disastrous date, you could say something like, "I feel sorry for Shannon after that blind date." My ideal first date would be _______. And yours?'
   • As soon as your colleague responds with his or her ideal first date, you can say something like, "Wow, that actually sounds great. Would you like to experience that for once? "

Tips

• Know and follow your employer's workplace relationships policy. Find out if you should disclose your relationship, and if so, to whom.
• It is usually a good idea to maintain the relationships at work between the two of you, unless it is required that your employer, supervisor, or human resources employee know about it. Do not show much affection for each other at work, as this will make your colleagues uncomfortable.
• Stay professional when you are at work. You don't have to ignore each other or pretend you don't know each other, but there's no need to hold hands, kiss, or be intimate at work.

Warnings

• Do not use the company email to ask your colleagues out or send love letters. If it's checked or if you get caught, you can get fired. Emails in which a coworker asks another colleague out can also be used as evidence against you in a sexual harassment case.
• Don't think of a business or professional meeting as a date. Keep all your business and personal communications separate.
• If your relationship makes others uncomfortable at work, they can complain about it to management. Even though it is not against policy, always act fully professionally at the office. It is better to err on the side of caution than to regret it afterwards.
• If you misinterpret "signals" or act inappropriately, you could be charged with sexual harassment.