Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 3: Lend the physical romance a hand
• Method 2 of 3: Make you more emotionally connected
• Method 3 of 3: Make changes to your routine
• Tips
• Warnings

Whether you're married or in some other type of committed relationship, keeping the romance fresh and alive can be quite a challenge. When both of you have busy jobs, the romance often suffers, and it can have disastrous consequences for your relationship. Keeping your relationship romantic will help you stay mentally and physically healthy over the long term, be closer to your partner, and get more fulfilling out of life.

To step

Method 1 of 3: Lend the physical romance a hand

1. Start your day with a physical declaration of love. Kiss your partner on the cheek and remind your loved one how much you love him or her. Studies have shown that if you wish your partner good morning warmly at the start of the day, or touch him or her physically, the rest of the day will be better. Physical contact in the morning sets a positive tone for the rest of the day.
   • Make sure you wake up a few minutes earlier than your partner.Turn off the alarm and wake him or her with a tender kiss on the cheek.
   • If for some reason you are not together and you are unable to give your partner physical love for a while, wake up your partner by sending him or her loving text messages.
   EXPERT TIP

   "Bring your partner coffee or breakfast in bed every now and then to make them feel special."

   
   

   Tease your partner. Walk around the house wearing only a towel and rub your partner's back when you walk past him or her. Seduce your partner with little teases. Slowly build up the prospect and desire for more touch.

   • A full body massage is a great way to build up the tension and make you feel intimate and connected.
2. Show your affection in public. Touch is the most important way to express your affection and create trust and a sense of security. When you touch your partner in public, you both experience those benefits, plus the added benefit of knowing that other people know about your love. By showing your love in public, you show that you are not ashamed of your partner and that the whole world should know that you are together.
   • If you're a man, keep the door open for your partner, and as she passes by, place your hand at the bottom of her back.
   • When you are in line at the couch together, look at each other and give each other a hug.
   • Make sure you don't behave indecently in public. If you go too far in such behavior, it can even be punishable.
3. Buy the book "Kama Sutra". Sex is an essential part of a happy and long-term relationship. Look for ways to have romantic and meaningful sexual encounters. Buy books such as "Kama Sutra" to learn new ways to pamper your partner.
   • Talk to each other about what you like and don't like in bed. Find out what turns your partner on and do your best to make him or her happy.
4. Create a "Fantasy Spot". Write down any erotic fantasies you'd like to experience with your partner, including role-playing or public caresses. Sharing your fantasies with your partner will allow you to see a deeper and more intimate side of each other, which will make you more connected and intimate with each other.
   • When your partner shares his or her fantasies with you, try not to judge them, but play the game. You should both be fully involved in every fantasy and dedicate yourself to getting the most fun out of it.

Method 2 of 3: Make you more emotionally connected

1. Communicate often and honestly. Open and honest communication is one of the cornerstones of a happy and romantic relationship. Telling your partner exactly how you feel, even everything you like and don't like, will bring more clarity between the two of you, and it will help you stay happier on all fronts. Spend at least five minutes a day checking together how your relationship is progressing. Talk about how you feel in certain situations and what you would like to see differently.
   • When communicating with your partner, try to bring things in a positive way. For example, if you didn't like your partner's unsolicited confirmation of your attendance at an event of his or her work, instead of saying `` I don't want you to make the decisions for me, '' say something like, ' I would love to support you in your work, but I would really like it if we could first discuss whether I will go to a certain social event, before you confirm my presence yourself. '
2. Leave love notes around the house for your partner to find. Do little, sweet things that let your partner know you're thinking about them when you're not together. Your partner will appreciate the effort you put in and will feel your love even when you're not together.
   • Another small act of affection could include sending sweet text messages to your partner while he or she is at work, or writing 'you are so beautiful' on the mirror, a packed lunch for him the night before or getting her ready, or cleaning the house.
3. Express your appreciation for your partner. Appreciation adds value to your partner and to your relationship. Let your partner know what physical, personal, and professional qualities you value in him or her that will make your partner feel loved and respected. Focus on the positive qualities, such as his or her hair, humor, or the fact that your partner is not selfish at all.
4. Accept your partner with all his or her mistakes and flaws. Your partner is not perfect and you knew that when you started the relationship. Accept the fact that he or she may never clean the dishes or that he or she is always late. Don't try to change your partner, but instead focus on encouraging his or her good sides, such as his or her intelligence or how your partner is doing to be the sunshine all over the house all the time!
   • Try to become aware of your own flaws and recognize that you are not perfect so that you can more easily accept your partner's flaws.
   • Treat your partner and his or her flaws with respect. If he or she is always late, respect for choosing to be late, but just be on time.

Method 3 of 3: Make changes to your routine

1. Plan an innovative and exciting evening for you together. So forget a quiet evening in the Italian restaurant where you have already been fifteen times. Instead, do exciting and refreshing things together, such as paintball, canoeing or rafting. Science shows that couples who undertake exciting things together are more satisfied than those who undertake pleasurable but more ordinary things together.
   • Do things together that you can participate in as a couple, such as dancing, kayaking, or building a fort together.
2. Pretend that every date you have is your first date. During a first date, you do your very best to impress. If you strive to look your best and show your best behavior every time you go on a date with your partner, you will both be happier and more satisfied.
3. Go away together for a weekend once a month. Get away from home two days a month and visit a place you and your partner have never been before. You can plan your trip or make it a spontaneous escape. Throw an arrow at a card and go to where the arrow ended up. If traveling is difficult because you have children or a limited budget, spend time together in a different part of the house, somewhere you hardly ever go.
   • Just try to change your setting as much as possible. By staying in a completely different environment with your partner, there is a chance that you will see your partner in a whole new light.
   • Traveling together can also be a test of your relationship because traveling together helps you discover how well you actually fit together, discovering how well you get along when you're together all the time.
4. Spend time apart. Taking time for yourself in a relationship is a healthy step because it stimulates your independence and creates mystery in your life. If you enjoy going to museums while your partner doesn't like it, going alone can help you appreciate yourself more, which in turn will have a positive impact on your relationship.
   • Have a "girls 'or boys' night" and spend an evening with your own group of friends. You can talk about things that you wouldn't discuss directly with your partner, and you will be reminded that you are someone individually too, instead of always seeing yourself as part of a couple.
5. Give your partner a gift just because you love him or her. Everyone likes to receive presents! It doesn't take a birthday or Christmas to give your partner a present. If you're in a store and see something that reminds you of your partner, buy it, pack it, and give it to your partner that same night at dinner. Your partner will be surprised by the unexpected gift and will appreciate your kind and generous gesture.
   • Gives gifts in moderation. Don't just buy anything that reminds you of your partner.
   • Buy gifts that are financially responsible. Buying a Mercedes for your partner is not convenient and could cause you financial difficulties.
   EXPERT TIP

   "If you want to be romantic, surprise your partner with gifts he or she likes, or try to arrange a surprisingly romantic getaway for the two of you."

   
   

   

   Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC

   Marriage and family therapist Moshe Ratson is executive director of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a coaching and therapy clinic in New York City. He holds a master's degree in matrimonial and family therapy from Iona College and has more than 10 years of experience as a therapist.

   Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC
   Marriage and family therapist

Tips

• Being in a relationship means hard work. You can't expect things to get better on their own. Make it a point to make every day a special and romantic day.
• The words "please" and "thank you" can mean a lot if you want to make another person feel appreciated.

Warnings

• If the romance continues to be lacking in your relationship and you feel that you and your partner have a problem, consider seeking therapy and seeking professional help to help you resolve the issues.