Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: How to Develop Friendships
• Method 2 of 3: How to be a good friend
• Method 3 of 3: How to Resolve Conflicts
• Tips
• Warnings

Maintaining strong friendships is not easy, especially as you grow up. If you want to become a better friend, find opportunities to talk with friends about life events and time to meet. One of the key aspects of deep friendships is the ability to support your friends and remember mutual respect in conflict situations.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: How to Develop Friendships

1. 1 Find opportunities to chat as often as possible. Communication is an important part of a friendly relationship. Try to call up and discuss everything in the world at least once a week or every two weeks! Talk about life events, discuss common interests, and make appointments.
   • Even if everyone is very busy, find opportunities to chat or exchange messages throughout the week. This way you will maintain a close relationship even if you are unable to see each other often.
   • Reassure your friend that you are always there and ready to help, even if there is not always an opportunity for a meeting or conversation.
2. 2 Try new things together. If you have always wanted to see Baikal or just go to a new cafe, then include friends in your plans. Shared new experiences will become memories and topics of discussion.
   • If you want to find yourself in a new situation together, then you can plan a trip or just cook a new dish.
   • You can sign up for painting or pottery courses together.
3. 3 Give friends small gifts or courtesies. Your mindfulness will help you bond. If you come across a thing that a friend will surely like. and it is quite affordable for you, then such a gift will show your concern. There is no need to look for special reasons for kind and caring actions.
   • For example, if a friend is sick, then visit him with chicken broth and medicine.
   • If a friend loves to knit, then you can buy her a skein of yarn in a beautiful color or new knitting needles.
   • If you want to help, but you do not have free money, then offer to look after your friend's pet when he is away, or help with the housework. Just make your friend's life easier and completely free!
4. 4 Support each other in difficult situations. Friends are people you can rely on and trust in almost everything. If one of you is in a difficult situation, it is sometimes helpful to talk about what is happening. In many cases, you will be able to offer good advice to each other. Show your friend that he can count on you for more than just moments of joy.
   • You will not always have ready-made solutions, however, it is enough just to listen to your friend as she tells you about what happened. Even talking can be a relief.
   • If you are aware of the situation, then periodically take an interest in the affairs of a friend or make appointments to cheer him up. For example, you can host an evening of your friend's favorite movies and video games!
   • Respect boundaries even in difficult times. For example, if a friend needs money, but you are not ready to help him financially, then it is better to observe such a border, otherwise in the future hostility may arise between you. Supporting a friend doesn't mean solving all of his problems.
5. 5 Share personal stories. It’s not easy, but it’s important for friends to share their fears, shortcomings, and concerns with each other. These conversations help you better understand each other and strengthen your relationship.
   • For example, if you are afraid of disappointing a friend and family, you can talk about it. In return, your friend can support you or share their fears.
   • If you think you have an ugly smile, tell your friend how you feel. Friends will always remind you that you are beautiful in body and soul.
   • It is important not to dwell on such issues and never touch upon the topics of a friend's fears or problems during an argument.Openness should bring you closer, not become a weapon in conflict.

Method 2 of 3: How to be a good friend

1. 1 Be honest with your friends. Sincerity and reliability are the most important qualities of a good friend. Always tell your friends the truth, even when it's hard. Try to speak the truth as gently and respectfully as possible, and not in front of strangers.
   • For example, if a friend is arguing with your mutual friend and spreading gossip about her, then you should calmly discuss the situation.
   • In this case, you can say: “I know that you are now at odds with Jeanne, but it seems to me that you should not tell her secrets to other people. I don’t want to interfere in your quarrel, but it seems to me that you will regret such an act ”.
   • Lying and hiding facts from friends is wrong. If you think it is better for you to remain silent about your actions, then there is a possibility that such actions will be harmful to you or to others.
2. 2 Ask your friends questions about their lives and thoughts. There is always a temptation to discuss only your life and problems, because this is important to you, but do not forget to be interested in the life of your friends! Ask about work, study, hobbies. Ask for their opinion on current events or future plans.
   • For example, if a friend signed up for the football section, then ask: “How was the training session? How do you like the new team? "
   • If a friend is going to go to university, then you can ask: “Are you already preparing? Do you need any help before exams? ”.
3. 3 Listen carefully to your friends. After asking, focus on your friend's answer. If necessary, react and ask clarifying questions. Don't give your opinion on the situation until the friend has finished speaking.
   • If you interrupt your friend often, try waiting an extra 5-10 seconds before you say anything. Many people do not realize that they are interrupting others, so if you wait, your friend will be able to finish his thought.
   • When talking face-to-face, maintain eye contact and do not get distracted. For example, don't play on your phone while talking to a friend.
4. 4 Be confident in yourself and your friendship. Sometimes close relationships can cause jealousy or insecurity. Remember that you are friends for a reason, but you are a good friend.
   • Don't be jealous if your friend wants to meet other people. It may seem that she does not give preference to you, but a person cannot always communicate only with you.
   • In case of uncertainty, it is better to talk about your feelings with a friend and find a common solution.
5. 5 Don't judge or ridicule your friends. It takes a lot of courage to share your thoughts and ideas with your friends. If a friend confessed something to you, then there is no need to shame him, even if he is wrong. Remember to be respectful and politely explain what you disagree with.
   • For example, if a friend says: "I think Auchan is closed now," and you know the opening hours, then you can say: "Let's check on the site. It seems to me that they extended the opening hours!".
6. 6 Be kind and polite to your friends. Boundaries are part of any healthy relationship, so it's always important to keep your friends' likes and dislikes in mind. You should never intentionally upset them or embarrass them.
   • For example, if you want to go to a party and your friend doesn't want to go, show respect and don't force him to agree with you.
   • Never call each other names, even jokingly.
7. 7 Don't tell anyone the secrets of your friends. If a friend has shared personal or sensitive information with you, do not tell anyone about it without their permission. Otherwise, rumors will arise that could hurt a friend. Show yourself a loyal and reliable friend who can keep secrets and resist temptation.
   • However, if you think your friend is in danger or may harm himself, please report it to doctors or law enforcement immediately for his safety. It may look like a betrayal, but a person's life and health are more important.
   • It may seem like gossip will bring you closer to other people, but in fact, such closeness comes at the cost of someone else's happiness, so never discuss people behind their back.

Method 3 of 3: How to Resolve Conflicts

1. 1 Trust that your friend is well-meaning. In times of argument, it often feels like the friend is just trying to upset you. It is important to remember that he knows you better than other people. If he does not like your act, then for sure he is worried and wants to protect you.
   • It is important to show empathy in conflicts. Try to put yourself in your friend's shoes to see the situation through their eyes. Perhaps you can understand his motives.
   • Remind yourself that you’re probably not going to be silent when your friend’s behavior is contrary to your beliefs.
2. 2 Tell your friends how you feel. When you're ready to discuss the fight, start with your feelings. This will help you focus on the current problem and not go back to old painful questions.
   • Formulate your statements in the first person: "I get upset when you talk about my shortcomings in the presence of strangers," - or: "I am upset that you and your friends got together without me."
   • Try not to start phrases with the word "you" like: "You discussed me behind my back, and this is very ugly."
3. 3 Control your emotions. It can be difficult to control yourself during an emotional conversation, but try to control yourself and remain neutral or even positive. You can count to ten before answering, or take a break from the conversation if the situation continues to escalate.
   • If the friend wants to end the conversation, respect their wishes and take a break until both of you cool off.
   • For example, if you are very upset, then say: "Let's take a break for a few minutes so that I calm down, and then continue the conversation?" Move to another room and pull yourself together, then return to a calm discussion.
4. 4 Work together to find a solution. In case of disagreement, you can consider that now you are opposing each other. Instead, try to imagine that you are fighting a problem together. Discuss your current feelings, exchange ideas for solving the problem, in order to choose a unified strategy.
   • For example, if you and a friend like one girl, you might suggest: “I think it's best for none of us to date her. This way we will keep our friendship and will not compete with each other because of the girl. ”
   • If you cannot choose one solution, then try combining 2-3 joint options.
   • A few weeks after using the collaborative solution, you need to discuss how effective it has been. Make changes or find a new solution as needed.

Tips

• Always be yourself and don't be ashamed of yourself. If a person condemns you as a person, then he cannot be called a good friend.

Warnings

• Respect your friends' personal boundaries. If they need to be alone, then they do not need to call or write dozens of messages. This kind of obsession can ruin a relationship.
• If one of your friends is showing symptoms of depression, talk about what is happening. If there is a perceived danger to a friend or others, contact law enforcement immediately. This may seem like a tough decision, but sometimes you need to protect your friend and other people.