Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Assessing the Situation
• Part 2 of 3: Nonviolent Ways
• Part 3 of 3: Physical Impact
• Tips

When two people have a scuffle, it can be difficult to know what to do. There are many things you can do to calm the aggressors, but first and foremost, you need to take care of your safety. Before intervening, form a clear idea of ​​what to do next so that you can choose the best solution. Take all possible steps to keep the conflict from getting worse.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Assessing the Situation

1. 1 Keep your distance. You absolutely don't need to get involved in a fight if you don't need to. Keeping your distance will keep yourself safe. If you are unsure what to do when faced with a fight, step back or find a safe place. This may be the best solution.
   • Your safety should be a priority.
   • Use nonviolent methods to end the fight before moving on to physical methods of influence.
   • Physical methods of influence should be resorted to only as a last resort, if you have no choice or nothing else helps.
2. 2 Find out the reasons for the fight. Conflict can arise from hidden or unconscious beliefs or values. Determining the true cause of the fight can help you resolve the conflict. Try to think about the characters of the participants in the action and the cultural aspects before you step into the game.
   • Find out what kind of relationship the participants in the fight are in. Do they know each other? Are they related? Is there a romantic interest mixed in here?
   • Consider possible motives. Is this aggression accidental, or is it caused by a specific feeling of being treated unfairly? The motivation of the participants in the fight depends on how they react to the attempts of an outsider to interrupt the fight. It is more difficult to stop random, unreasonable aggression from the outside, since the aggressor himself does not fully realize why he behaves this way.
   • Ask questions to those people who might know the answer.
3. 3 Establish the facts. A fight can start because of a misunderstanding. Having truthful information about what's going on will give you an advantage when you need to reassure those in a fight. Make sure you really know the truth about the situation before rushing into the thick of things. Better not to interfere at all than to worsen the situation.
   • Make a note of who did what, where, when, and why. This will help you understand the general situation and also help the police if it comes to that.
   • Talk to witnesses.
   • Ask around people who are related to what is happening.
4. 4 Assess your capabilities critically. You must be absolutely sure that you can resolve this conflict. Rationally assess your condition. If you are drunk, exhausted, or simply inappropriately dressed for the activity, think twice before trying to separate the fighters.
5. 5 Assess the capabilities of the participants in the fight. Think about the position of everyone involved. If they are drunk, armed, or obviously more skillful "fighters," then this may not be the best situation to intervene. Understand what the aggravating party is seeking before deciding to intervene.
6. 6 Find someone who has the right to intervene. Call a teacher, security guard, or police officer for help. In order not to suffer yourself, ask for help from someone who knows how to cope with such situations. Immediately find an empowered person who can deal with far-reaching conflict.

Part 2 of 3: Nonviolent Ways

1. 1 Distract the participants in the fight. When a relationship between two people escalates, it can sometimes be distracted to calm it down. You can ask or mention their family members or friends who are present during the fight. This can make them think of someone they are warm to, and thus reassure. There are many quick ways to relieve tension.
   • Speak in a calm but commanding voice, calling for an end to the fight. In this way, most child fights can be stopped.
   • Maintain a sense of humor.
   • Sing the song out loud.
   • Do not Cry.
2. 2 Demonstratively start calling the police. If you loudly announce that you are calling the police, and then pick up the phone, fighters can quickly cool their fervor. Nobody wants to be left in a compromising situation when the police arrive. This is a quick fix, but be prepared for charges to be brought against the participants in the events, and you will need to stay where you are to talk to the police.
3. 3 Show empathy. To do this, you need to put yourself in the shoes of the other person. Empathy will allow you to understand the emotional root cause of aggression so that you can try to persuade people who will not accept the logical reasoning at the moment. By giving yourself the opportunity to understand how your opponents are feeling, as well as by trying to make them understand each other's feelings, you can better understand how to resolve the conflict. By appealing for empathy, you can soften the aggression.
   • Ask the participants in the fight to see the situation through the eyes of another.
   • Use words that show the participants in the fight that you understand their feelings.
   • Use simple and emotional words to create empathy.
4. 4 Talk to the participants in the fight. Often, the aggressor can be calmed down with a calm voice. Dialogue empowers people to vent the emotions that fuel aggression and is therefore key to conflict resolution. Through dialogue, you can also identify the source of the problem.
   • Use self-statements.
     • It seems to me...
     • I understand what you are talking about ...
     • Avoid the "you-statements" that sometimes sound accusatory.
   • Ask questions.
   • Stay calm.
5. 5 Listen to your interlocutors. Aggression can be the result of discontent, which is sometimes just enough to listen. Give each of the participants in the fight an opportunity to speak, and also make them feel that someone really listens and understands their feelings. Sometimes people feel better if they just let them talk.
   • Use expressions in your speech that make it clear that you are listening. For example: "I understand your position."
   • Nod.
   • Look the other person in the eye.
6. 6 Become a mediator. Encourage opponents to find a compromise. Participate in the discussion so that no one leaves offended. However, do not impose a solution on either side of the conflict. Remember to remain impartial as this is the only way for both parties to feel comfortable.
   • Listen actively.
   • Ask questions.
   • Gradually help the parties to the conflict to reach an agreement that suits everyone.
7. 7 Promote reconciliation of the parties. Try to help the participants in the fight to realize how they insulted the opponent and to forgive each other. This will help to avoid fights in the future, as well as to resolve the situation. By helping people make peace, we empower them to forgive and leave the past behind.

Part 3 of 3: Physical Impact

1. 1 Splash cold water on the fighters. Sometimes a jet of cold water can rein in an explosive nature. Throw a cup or pot of water over the fighting people, or better, find a watering hose. When using a hose, you do not need to come into direct contact with the aggressors.
2. 2 Stand between the fighters. By taking a position between two people, you can interrupt their fight. It is important to understand when such an action could lead to the fact that you yourself get hurt.Such a decision can be a win-win if you are absolutely sure that none of the fighters will harm you.
3. 3 Limit the movement of the attacker. Be careful when holding someone back. Many containment techniques can result in trauma for both you and the person you are holding. While combat grapples and other containment techniques can help deal with an adult, they can also cause injury or even death, so their use should be limited to emergencies only. Do not restrain children in such ways (for example, you can not grab them by the neck from behind).
   • The best solution is a strong hug: by law, this is an acceptable way to end a fight between children if you do not have special skills in this matter.
   • A hug can also be used when adults need to be separated.
   • Grip behind the neck.
   • Grabbing legs / arms.
   • Pressing down on the ground.
4. 4 Use a pepper spray. Police often use pepper spray to break up fights. If you are an ordinary citizen, use this only as a last resort. Pepper spray will not only neutralize the aggressor, but also prevent the fight from flaring up again.
   • Use pepper spray with caution, as some people are allergic to it and can lead to serious health problems.
   • Also keep in mind that it is illegal to use pepper spray in some countries, which means splashing someone in the face is a crime.

Tips

• Don't take sides.
• Do not interfere until necessary.
• Don't lose your calm.
• If you are on campus, call a teacher or security guard immediately.
• If you see a guard or policeman nearby, call him. A professional is better at stopping a fight.
• Call the police or ambulance immediately (if necessary).