Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Part One: Think Everything
• Method 2 of 3: Part Two: Entering the Battlefield
• Method 3 of 3: Part Three: Attacking Fears
• Tips
• Warnings

It is very easy to ignore your fears and hope that they will simply disappear. Unfortunately, this is not often the case. When they start to affect our daily life, something needs to be done. How do you meet them face to face? With the right way of thinking, you ask yourself why you haven't done this before.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Part One: Think Everything

1. 1 Write your fears down on paper. Seriously. Grab a paper and a pen right now. Write about your fears. Where are they from? What are their sources? When did they originate in you? When do they seem less powerful to you? How do you feel under their influence? The moment of detachment from your fear and from yourself - looking at yourself on paper - will help you to think more logically, to perceive your fear a little more objectively.
   • In fact, it is a great idea to have a fear journal. Any time you feel that fear is taking over, grab your handy notebook and write it down.Not only is it a good way to vent your feelings, but it can also help you return to earth and realize that, after all, you are the master of the situation.
2. 2 Describe the ladder of fear. Great, now pick one fear you want to fight. At the top of the stairs, write what this fear is. We're going to break it down into stages - at the foot of the stairs, come up with a starting step where you would start embracing fear. With each flight of stairs, think of one more action that will lead you to the top, where you can face your fear with your shoulders straightened.
   • For example, suppose you are afraid to fly. Even the sight of an airplane makes you nervous. At the bottom of the stairs, write “go to the airport”. You just go to the airport and that's it. The next step is to study how the plane works (no more "the plane is kept in the air by magic!"). Next, you'll sign up for a short, 30-minute flight with a friend. A few steps later, you are already making a 4-hour flight on your own. Do you see how it works?
3. 3 Become aware of how your thinking works. Now that your brain is fully focused on your fear - you know where it comes from, you have broken it down into its component parts - it's time to focus your brain, how to say, on your brain. Think about him, this fear of yours. It's just a way of thinking. It is not specific, it is not animate, it is just a neuron that accidentally detached itself in your head, which makes you run as fast as you can. It’s just a small neuron that can be completely controlled. It's easy. You just need to face yourself.
   • Indeed, take a moment to face this image. Whatever happens in your head, it is created only by you, one way or another. You don't have to literally collide with something or someone - you just need to change the way you think about it. When you realize that the obstacle is actually no longer there, you will begin to move towards serious progress.
4. 4 Talk to a psychologist. If you're afraid to speak in public, that's one thing. Most people are afraid of this. But if you are afraid of a little green man who will appear from your closet and take you to Santa Fe, then this is different. Problems begin when your fear is well-founded, irrational, overwhelming, or even debilitating. If you notice any of the above in yourself, contact a specialist. He will help to cope with fear today, no matter what it is.
   • The field of psychology has made great strides forward with the use of the outward technique. There is a progressive technique for desensitization, when every day the psychologist lets you get closer to fear, and then abruptly forces you to face it face to face. Throws you right into the midst of fear. Sounds creepy, that's for sure, but worth it.
5. 5 Pay attention to specific fear. Remember, you are not alone. There are thousands, maybe millions, of people who have the same problem. How did they overcome their fears? With modern technology today, you can learn about it with ease. And, of course, wikiHow is always at hand!

Method 2 of 3: Part Two: Entering the Battlefield

1. 1 Visualization success. Imagine yourself as confident and completely fearless. Of course you might think this is stupid, but it works. At the very least, it will improve your mood, you will think positively and want to get out of the familiar environment. Therefore, imagine yourself in the situation. Think about the look, smells, how you feel, what you can touch. Now control this. This situation is now fictitious just as much as it is real. Doesn't fit in your head, right?
   • It takes practice. First, visualize for 5 minutes. When it starts to work, increase the interval to 10. Next, visualize how much will be needed to be in a particular situation.It's like meditation with a positive, life-affirming outlook. And when success comes, it will not be something extraordinary - you are already accustomed to it!
2. 2 Relax your body. While in bed, try the following: hold your breath, clench your fists, and strain. Very soon, you will also feel inner tension. Your mind also receives signals from the body, not just the body from it. The good news is that it works and vice versa... By relaxing your body, you also relax your mind. Try it!
   • If you react like most people, then even thoughts about your fear will make you nervous. Therefore, while you are in a secluded spot, concentrate on more relaxation. Start at the forehead and work your way down slowly. Think about the rhythm of your heart, about how you control yourself. When your body is on the alert, it is extremely difficult for your mind to be prepared to fight or flee.
3. 3 Breathe. A tremendous amount of attention in the work of getting rid of fear is given to breathing. As your breathing quickens, your mind starts to lose its composure. It doesn't matter if the danger is real or not, we still perceive it. Adrenaline is released into the bloodstream and it becomes clear that something needs to be done (remember how things are with panic). The solution to this problem is to remember to breathe... You can you deliberately slow down your breathing. The oxygen supplied will help you calm down.
   • Work on deep breathing. Most of us breathe only with the chest, not using the entire volume of the lungs in the diaphragm. Therefore, make sure your belly moves as you breathe - this will let you know that you are doing everything right!
4. 4 Live in the moment. Most fears are about the future. We can't put it into words, but we still worry about the future. We are experiencing so much that it exhausts us now. Winston Churchill is credited with saying: "When I look back at all this excitement, I remember the story of an old man who said on his deathbed that he had many troubles in his life, most of which never happened." So when you feel fear is creeping in, think about the present moment. Think about smells, what you hear, what your fingers are touching, how clothes touch your body, which part of your body is the coldest that touches your vision. Focus on now.
   • Let's say you need to give a speech and you are afraid of the audience. Instead of drawing pictures of you panicking, stuttering all the time and everyone laughing at you, think of the ugly carpet in the foyer. About this feeling in the stomach from an incomprehensible smell during the day. About the cracked paint on the ceiling. And here is the time to speak - and you did not even think to bring yourself to your usual panicky way of thinking, which was so peculiar to you. Keep it up!
5. 5 Think about your past accomplishments. It's a little strange, but thinking about our success (even if it happened a long time ago, like when we learned to ride a bike, even though it seemed impossible) can really give strength. What amazing actions have you taken in the face of failure? What have you done that seemed unrealistic to you? What did not kill you, but only made you stronger?
   • It may take time to think about it, but you will remember it. Did you graduate from high school? Were you part of a successful team? Have you ever cooked / painted / created / wrote / anything impressive? Have you learned to drive? Play an instrument? Anything to be proud of!
6. 6 Think 20 seconds. Just 20 seconds. When faced with fears, think for only 20 seconds. And that's all. Not the rest of your life is at stake, and not even the rest of the day. All you need is the next 20 seconds. If you can pull yourself together in 20 seconds, you will reach your goal! Do you know how little 20 seconds is?
   • 20 seconds of exciting courage.20 seconds of unquenchable pleasure. 20 seconds of unbridled superiority. You can do it, right? You will find for this a third of a minute? Because when those first 20 seconds are up, everything will go on like clockwork.

Method 3 of 3: Part Three: Attacking Fears

1. 1 Get naked. No, you are not thinking about that. Expose yourself to fear. This is the only way to overcome it. You need to climb the stairs. Well, go to the pet store and see the snakes. Speak to employees. Try tickling your foot. Do what you fear. You are already making progress. You've come this far.
   • When you look at the snake and everything inside you no longer grows cold with fear, come closer. And the next day is even closer. Move closer until you can touch the tank. The next day, put your hand on her. Then stick your finger inside. Over time, whether you realize it or not, you will already be stroking the snake and perhaps even taking one home as a symbol of your consummation.
     • This is, of course, just an example. Replace "snake" with anything you fear. But it is not necessary to iron everything that you are afraid of; it may not be approved.
2. 2 Realize that this is not innate in you. Imagine that you are sitting in a cafe drinking a latte, a child runs up to you and just looks at you, for no reason and without saying anything. In a few years, he would have been ashamed of such behavior. Our adult fears are the same! When we are small, we do not know that we need to be afraid of something. Then, as we grow up, we learn that we need to be afraid of certain things. We are afraid to look at others. We are afraid to put on a work coat for chemistry class. We are afraid to visit the roller coaster. And there was a time when they were not afraid.
   • If your fear is social, then it will be especially susceptible. Let's look at the chemistry class work coat situation as an example. You won't answer the bad guys, will you? Why did it happen? What can they do - laugh and point fingers? What if so? What will happen? Exactly. If your best friend did the same, would you approve of their strange behavior? Probably, you would think.
3. 3 Get distracted. I don't think there is much to explain here. Your brain can only think of a few things at a time, so if you load it with a bunch of impulses, some of those bad, scary signals will be pushed aside. And so, while going through airport security, keep your iPod on. This may be just what distracts you.
   • Music is fine, but there are dozens more ways. Pinch yourself. Eat spicy food. Nonsense, try to list at least 10 types of fish. Even things that seem very simple can be effective.
4. 4 Be with people who support you. Having a friend to help you get through this is essential. You just need someone to hold your hand! And there is nothing shameful about that. Even adults need support from time to time. Such people will help you find solid ground under you. Distract and support you.
   • Ask family or friends to help you with this. They will be so proud of you! Tell them about your plan, how you are going to deal with it all and just ask them to be with you during all this. Let them be aware of how you might react and what you need from them. They can only help you if they realize how do it.
5. 5 Talk about your fears. Sometimes it seems like something makes sense until you say it out loud. And when you say it, you realize that it's just ridiculous. This can also apply to fears. Talk to someone about your fears. It will help you feel reality again!
   • Let's say you're afraid to ask your boss for a raise. Your friend asks you what scares you. You answer: "What if I get fired ?!" ... Think about it.Of all the possible outcomes of this situation, what is the likelihood that you will be fired? You might get a promotion, your boss might turn you down, they might tell you why you're not getting one (but what could you do to get you promoted soon), but how likely are you to be fired? Extremely small. Sometimes you need to express this in order to realize.
6. 6 Pretend. While this may not sound like worthwhile advice, it can be powerful. Many people have learned to be confident in themselves by pretending, many have become decisive because of this, and many have also overcome their fears in this way. And it works! Because almost everything is in your head. No one else knows what you are pretending because in them the world is real. Only you know about it.
   • The mind is a cunning sly. Have you ever had to force yourself to smile and then become happier? At first you yawned, and only then did you feel tired? It works the same way. If you pretend you don’t care, you’re not scared ... very soon it will.
7. 7 Decide for yourself what you want the most. Sometimes we just sit out our lives. We sit it for a long time and methodically. We postpone everything until there is nowhere else to postpone. Unfortunately, this moment is not always under our control. He comes when he wants to. This is exactly the starting point when you decide that your desire has become more than fear. Then, suddenly, it turns out that being afraid is no longer even an alternative. You want it so much that fear is no longer even close.
   • This is easiest to deal with with fears that interfere with your daily life. If you are afraid of American toucans, you probably will not want to fight the fear so much that you will get down to business. But if you are afraid of the crowd, this desire can become very real. Focus on it. Grab onto it. Take the time to realize that fear is not worth it. Use this. Use this to your advantage. And you will get the result!
8. 8 Reward yourself. Every time you face a little fear and overcome it, reward yourself for it. Eat the cake! Treat yourself to shopping! Let it sound strange, take a nap. You deserve it. You are doing what most people cannot do. Mentally "pat yourself on the shoulder" and tell everyone about it. This is something to be proud of!
   • When you have overcome your last fear, reward yourself like a king. The greater the fear, the greater the reward. Think of it ahead of time as something to look forward to! Everyone needs motivation. When you have rewards, when other people know about your progress, you have no choice but to succeed. And if you think positively, you will achieve it!

Tips

• Read more about how to deal with your fears, at least one article a day. The more you tune your mindset to deal with fears, the more it will help you throw them out of your subconscious mind.

Warnings

• When we write about dealing with fear, we do not mean that you have to do something “very” dangerous. For example, if you are afraid of sharks, you should not swim with them in the ocean. If you want to overcome your fears, be careful and be smart about it.
• Sometimes you may realize that you are afraid, but you cannot overcome your fear, which you so wanted to overcome today. It's OK. Do not be nervous. Get ready to go through the thorns tomorrow!