Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 2: Common misconceptions
• Method 2 of 2: Common Features
• Tips
• Warnings

“Body language of people with autism” is not quite the correct wording, since every person with autism is unique and it is difficult to make any generalizations. In this article, we'll look at common behavioral patterns and misconceptions. When applying this information in practice, it should be remembered that each person is unique, so the content of individual steps may not be applicable to a particular person.

Steps

Method 1 of 2: Common misconceptions

1. 1 Remember that other does not mean inferior. People with autism communicate differently, but that doesn't make their way of communication any worse. All people (including those who do not have autism) have unique characteristics, so in this case, you cannot use the ratings "right" or "wrong".
2. 2 Let go of expectations about behavior. You may have a fairly narrow idea of ​​what a particular behavior means. So, if you think that the lack of eye contact means inattention, you might think that the person with autism is ignoring you, when in fact they are listening to you very carefully. Try to get rid of stereotypes and get to know this particular person better.
3. 3 Embrace the differences and don't be afraid of incomprehensible body language. If this is new to you, then there is no need to be afraid. Strange grimaces and hand waving may seem unpredictable, but that doesn't mean the person is dangerous or wants to harm you. Take a deep breath and relax.
4. 4 Consider the context. Body language is a complex system, and people with autism are very different, so there is simply no simple list or scheme of meanings for each action. Contextual clues (situation, words, facial expressions) and common sense will become your main allies.
5. 5 When in doubt, ask direct questions. It is better to ask the person for explanations than to get upset or draw the wrong conclusions.People with autism themselves sometimes need an explanation of your feelings and are able to understand if you ask them for the same. Speaking politely and respectfully is perfectly normal.
   • “I noticed that during the conversation you were fidgeting all the time. Does something bother you, or do you always fidget when you listen? "
   • “I noticed that you are not looking at me when we are talking. Is this a common thing for you? "
   • "Are you sad or just thinking?"

Method 2 of 2: Common Features

These general tips will help you better understand those close to you with autism. The meaning of a person's actions may coincide with many of the listed features, but not necessarily with all of them.

1. 1 Think of missing facial expressions as thoughtful, not meaningless or sad. Many people with autism relax their facial muscles during moments of mental strain. In this case, a person can look into the distance, open his mouth, and no emotions will be reflected on his face.
   • Lining up objects is an action that often occurs in people with autism when they are immersed in their thoughts.
   • Some people with autism always use these facial expressions when they need to focus on the other person's words.
   • If a person is looking somewhere into the distance alone, then we can assume that he is thinking very deeply. He can still hear you, but if you want to tell him something, you first need to get attention.
2. 2 Don't expect eye contact. Eye contact can be distracting and even painful for someone with autism, so as they talk, they will look at your shirt, hands, empty space next to you, their own hands, and so on. His eyes can be defocused. This usually happens because his brain is focused on your words.
   • If the person seems to be “out of the blue,” try calling them by name, getting their attention with words, or waving your hand in front of their eyes (if all else fails).
3. 3 Think of self-stimulation as part of your regular body language. Self-stimulation often helps people with autism calm down, focus, and generally feel good. If during a conversation with you the person resorted to self-stimulation, consider that in this way he is trying to focus, and not be distracted.
   • People with autism may suppress the need for self-stimulation for fear that people they do not know or trust will criticize them. So if a person openly resorts to self-stimulation in your presence, it means that he most likely trusts you and feels safe with you.
4. 4 Understand that self-stimulation can have a variety of meanings. If a person with autism engages in repetitive activities or movements in your community, it often means that they trust you and can be themselves. The meaning of the action may vary depending on the situation. A person can express emotion, deal with stress or overexertion, try to concentrate, or put a different meaning into such an action. Here's a hint:
   • Facial expression - Self-stimulation with a smile and self-stimulation with a frowning face usually have different meanings.
   • Words and sounds - words or sounds that a person makes (crying, laughing, etc.) can tell you how he is feeling.
   • Context - If a woman waves her arms at the sight of a cute puppy, she is probably expressing delight, but if she waves her arms and whimpers when working on a difficult task, she may be desperate or need rest.
   • Sometimes self-stimulation is devoid of emotional meaning. Then it can be compared to how if you stood up and stretched - this does not in any way indicate your mood.
   Specialist Answer Question

   What does self-stimulation usually mean to you?

   
   

   

   Luna rose

   Community Specialist Luna Rose is a community member, autistic, specializing in writing and autism.She has a degree in computer science and has performed at college events to raise awareness about disability. Leads the wikiHow autism project.

   SPECIALIST'S ADVICE

   Community member Luna Rose replies: “Self-stimulation can mean so many different things. Personally, it helps me to concentrate or calm down if there is too much going on around me. For example, I might hum a song to myself in the cafeteria to ignore the noise from those huge rumbling carts and focus on the song instead. She can also just be a great way to express your feelings. Some people wrote fanfiction based on my story, and I hit the wall - this is how self-stimulation helped me express my happiness. "

   
   
5. 5 Understand that the person often looks away because they are thoughtful or emotionally overwhelmed, and not out of unwillingness to communicate with you. People with autism may look away when sight, sound, touch, or other sensory input becomes unbearable. If you are near a person and he starts to look away, you may need to step back, speak more quietly, or not touch him.
   • Autistic people may look away when asked a question. This means what they are thinking, and you just need to calmly wait for them to answer.
   • A sideways glance can also be a sign of dissatisfaction. For example, if you ask your son, "Are you ready to start your homework?" - and he looks away, then he is either pondering the answer, or is unhappy that he needs to do his homework.
   • If you notice certain patterns in the way a person looks away, take them into account and, if necessary, change your behavior. For example, if your niece always turns away when you try to kiss her, kissing may be too close contact and overwhelm her.
   • It doesn't have to be about you. The problem could be someone else or the environment. If the person has a hard time keeping up a conversation, try moving to a quieter place.
6. 6 Take your time to interpret a strange facial expression as a sign of anger or frustration. Some people with autism may grimace a lot. This usually means that they feel safe with you and do not need to watch their every move. This is a great sign! Here are some possible meanings of this strange expression:
   • Natural expression - sometimes the usual facial expression of an autistic person differs from the usual expression of a neurotypical person.
   • Joy - this is the unique way of this person to smile and express a good mood.
   • Disappointment or pain - try to find contextual clues to understand if this is the case.
   • Self-stimulation - a person may feel the need to move the muscles of the face, just as you can open and close a zipper or click a ballpoint pen when we have nothing to do.
   • Normal warm-up - An autistic person can flex the muscles of the face as you stretch, the muscles of the arms or shoulders.
   • Playing the fool - the person wants you to smile.
7. 7 Consider movement problems. Movements that seem jerky, clumsy, violent, or angry are not necessarily emotionally related — dyspraxia, poor coordination, cerebral palsy, and other problems that make movement difficult may be the cause. If a person often moves in this way, understand that it is all about natural physical limitations, and do not think that the person is angry when he is just trying to perform some action.
8. 8 Pay attention to arousal. People with autism are prone to increased anxiety and may experience sensory problems that cause discomfort or pain. Excessively vigorous movement (including self-stimulation) combined with an absent or upset facial expression may mean that the person needs to rest.
   • Make sure that emotional exhaustion does not occur and the person does not “pass out”.
9. 9 Understand that it's okay not to understand. Autistic people can do a lot of unusual things - shouting “Pi! Pi! Pi! " along with the microwave timer or smile and go limp when you hug them. You don't need to worry about it. Learn to appreciate differences and accept people for who they are.

Tips

• Autism community sites have a lot of information and personal notes that you might find useful.
• For some people, facial expressions do not match their inner feelings. For example, if a child never smiles, then he can still experience joy, just this feeling does not manifest externally.

Warnings

• Never use coercion, physical force, or any plan to force a person with autism to conform to social norms. If they themselves try to comply with them, it is their choice, and they have every right to make such a decision, as well as any other.