Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 4: How to Analyze Difficulties and Set Goals
• Method 2 of 4: How to keep your balance
• Method 3 of 4: How to Develop Mental and Emotional Strength
• Method 4 of 4: Dealing with Difficulties
• Tips

Relax. Would you like to be able to deftly and effectively deal with the vicissitudes of fate? Mental and emotional changes don't happen overnight. Begin to see every challenge in life as an opportunity to become stronger, so that you gain the wisdom and clarity of thought that will help you overcome any obstacle.

Steps

Method 1 of 4: How to Analyze Difficulties and Set Goals

1. 1 Understand the essence of emotional endurance. Emotional and mental strength or endurance is the ability to adapt to stress, trauma, adversity, and tragic situations. Humans are not born with this ability, but everyone is capable of developing endurance and resistance to trials.
   • Emotionally strong people also experience pain and suffering, as endurance is often acquired in extremely painful situations. Learn recover and "come to life" after such experiences.
   • To develop endurance, you need to develop certain skills: learn to make and implement plans, build confidence and self-esteem, learn to control strong feelings and impulses, and practice effectively communicating and solving problems.
2. 2 Get to know emotional regulation. The ability to control your emotions is another important aspect of emotional and mental stamina. A person does not control every event in his life, but he can always choose how to react to a situation. Remember that this is not an innate ability, so everyone can learn to effectively control their emotions.
3. 3 Identify specific aspects that need to be changed. To develop emotional and mental strength, you need to analyze your strengths and weaknesses in order to identify the nuances that need to be changed. Make a list of all your strengths and weaknesses that you can remember. When the checklist is ready, state your weaknesses as goals to be achieved.
   • For example, you indicated that it is difficult for you to express your needs. To solve this problem, set yourself the goal of becoming more decisive.
4. 4 Recognize your strengths. In addition to identifying shortcomings, you also need to recognize your strengths. Reread your list of strengths and congratulate yourself for having those strengths. Periodic encouragement will help you remember positive qualities and develop resilience.
5. 5 Consider your past experiences. Feeling a lack of mental or emotional strength may be related to events that happened to you in the past. Any situation that took place just a couple of months ago or even in early childhood can affect. Studies have shown that if a child is abused or confronted with indifference, as an adult, they are at increased risk of emotional and mental problems that lead to drug use or suicide attempts.
   • Try to understand if bad experiences from childhood can affect your mental and emotional well-being.Also try to establish the characteristics and reasons for this influence.
   • For a complete understanding and solution of the problem, it is recommended to consult a psychotherapist.
6. 6 Assess the presence of addictions that require treatment. Addiction to drugs, alcohol, sex, and other things can harm your mental and emotional stability. If you think you have an addiction, then get help. So, in some cases, treatment may be required. Consult a specialist if you have any harmful addictions.
7. 7 Write down your thoughts and feelings in a journal. This is a good way to understand the possible causes of the difficulties you are experiencing, as well as to relieve stress. Find a comfortable place and devote 20 minutes a day to your journal entries. Write down your feelings or thoughts, and, if necessary, use the following suggestions-hints:
   • "I feel helpless when ...!;
   • "The hardest thing for me is ...";
   • "If I could return to childhood and give advice to myself, then ...";
   • "In moments of uncertainty, it helps me the most ...".
8. 8 See a psychotherapist. Sometimes it is very difficult to find answers and solutions without outside help. An experienced professional can help you understand your feelings and find effective solutions.
   • Be aware that mental and emotional deficits can be caused by a mental disorder. The specialist will advise you on the best course of action.

Method 2 of 4: How to keep your balance

1. 1 Resist temptations that harm your mental health. If you frequently test your mental health with alcohol, drugs, theft, lying and similar vices, then you weaken your emotional and mental stability. Refrain from, or at least limit, such activities so that they do not control your behavior and emotions. If you are addicted, seek help.
2. 2 Take care of yourself. Exercise, eat right, relax, and rest to develop and maintain mental and emotional strength. Taking care of yourself will show your brain that you deserve to be treated well. Remember to meet your basic needs for physical activity, nutrition, sleep, and rest.
   • Exercise regularly for at least 30 minutes every day.
   • Eat fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean protein.
   • Aim to get eight hours of sleep every night.
   • Spend at least 15 minutes a day doing yoga, breathing exercises, or meditation.
   • Drink plenty of water (at least eight glasses a day or more if you exercise).
3. 3 Find food for your mind. Strive to learn every day. New knowledge gives us mental strength and wisdom. Avoid mental or physical stagnation. Show curiosity, awareness, and a desire to explore the world around you.
   • Read books, watch good films, go to concerts and plays, watch ballet and enjoy the arts.
   • Make art. Write, paint, compose music, sculpture, knit - any activity that uses the creative part of the brain will do.
   • Acquire new skills. Prepare new meals, make home decorations, garden, learn to drive, fish, or prepare for a half marathon.
   • Chat with people. Don't limit yourself to talking about the weather. Listen and tell.
4. 4 Develop spirituality. Many people draw strength from the spiritual. The connection with something great (in any form) allows you to become stronger and find a goal. Research shows that spirituality and prayer can reduce stress and speed healing in the event of illness. Find for yourself a suitable manifestation of spiritual development, since there are no "correct" ways.
   • Go to church to pray with others.
   • Practice meditation or yoga.
   • Spend time in nature and admire the beauty of our world.

Method 3 of 4: How to Develop Mental and Emotional Strength

1. 1 Set and implement reasonable goals. It is useful to develop mental strengths to set and implement reasonable goals. Take it step by step - put in the effort, strive to overcome boredom or pain, and stay on track. This is not an easy task, but the more practice you have, the easier it will be for you to achieve your goals.
   • Ambitious goals that seem out of reach should be broken down into more manageable steps. So, if you want to be more assertive, make it your goal to voice your desires three times a week. For example, it is enough to tell your partner that you want to go to a particular restaurant, so as not to rely only on his choice.
   • Try not to "deviate" from the goal. If you fail, keep putting in the effort, be it a desire to keep your job, complete a project, or control your finances.
   • View failure as opportunities to learn. Failures are just temporary stops from which you can get a lot of benefit.
2. 2 Learn to resist negativity. Negativity can have various manifestations: it comes from the inside in the form of negative thoughts and internal dialogue, or from the outside in the form of negative feedback and a bad attitude towards you. A person is not able to eliminate all negative factors, but is able to influence the flow of negative.
   • Learn to notice and deal with negative thoughts. Read this article on how to deal with negative thoughts.
   • A person is able to minimize contact with negative or toxic people, or even completely exclude them from his life, but sometimes such people are our relatives, colleagues or other persons, communication with whom cannot be avoided. Don't take their negativity too much to heart. Try to communicate less and set boundaries. Our article on how to communicate with negative people will help you with this.
3. 3 Build mental and emotional stamina through positive self-talk. Thus, daily positive affirmations help develop emotional and mental strength. Take a moment to look at yourself in the mirror and say something encouraging. Say facts about yourself that you believe or want to believe. Examples of positive statements:
   • “I try to become emotionally stronger every day”;
   • "I am learning to effectively manage stress and be kinder to myself";
   • "I know that even small daily steps towards a goal make me stronger emotionally and mentally."
4. 4 Learn to stay calm under pressure. When things get heated, emotions get out of hand. By holding back a little and not acting impulsively, you will have more time to weigh your options and choose the best solution.
   • The advice to count to ten sounds pretty trite, but it really works. Before reacting emotionally to an event, stop, take a deep breath, and consider your actions.
   • Meditation helps to keep ourselves in control, as it teaches us to objectively perceive emotions and thoughts. Instead of responding, consider your emotions and thoughts and say, “Okay, I'm disappointed right now,” and then consider your next step.
5. 5 Don't worry about the little things. If you are susceptible to minor stimuli or verbal injections that occur every day, then you are wasting your time and energy on things that don't matter. If you get hung up and pay attention to the little things, or perceive them as problems, then you increase not only your stress level, but also your risk of death. Change your attitude and take the little things calmly to reduce the amount of cortisol (the stress hormone) in your body, protect yourself from negative factors such as low immunity, high blood pressure and cholesterol, and reduce the likelihood of heart disease.
   • Instead of worrying, make the healthy habit of thinking about the stimulus, calming down, and choosing the most optimal, healthy, and productive course of action.
   • For example, if your husband always forgets to close the tube of toothpaste, then understand that this is less important to him than to you. Choose an appropriate course of action - close the tube yourself and think of other help your husband has around the house, or leave him a kind note with a polite reminder.
   • Beware of perfectionism, which can create extremely high and often unrealistic expectations of yourself and your life without considering the fact that the person does not have control over many aspects of the situation.
   • Use a visualization exercise to combat minor irritants. Just take a small stone in your hand and imagine that it is the very problem. Focus on negative thoughts and squeeze the stone in your hand, and when you are ready, throw the stone into a pond or field. At the same time, imagine that the irritant and your negative feelings fly away with the stone.
6. 6 Change your perception. If you tend to dwell on problems, then try to look at life and opportunities differently. Everyone can get stumped from time to time, but mentally and emotionally strong people are able to find a way out. If you find it difficult to get the problem out of your head, then use one of the methods described below:
   • Read more. When reading news or novels, we plunge into another world and remember that our experiences are a drop in the sea of ​​world problems.
   • Volunteer. Help those who need help. Research shows these activities are beneficial for mental and physical health.
   • Listen to your friend. Listen to the person who needs your advice. Put yourself in the shoes of such a person and try to give the most sincere and practical advice.
   • Travel. Step out of your comfort zone to assess the situation from the outside. Go to a new city, even in a neighboring area.
7. 7 Look at life in a positive way. Mentally and emotionally strong people don't tend to complain about life. They also have enough problems, but they are calmer about the situation and see the global picture. Be aware of the positive aspects and future opportunities to become emotionally and psychologically stronger for solving truly difficult problems. A number of studies have shown that a positive outlook on life is even beneficial for a person's physical health.
   • Enjoy the moment of happiness. Enjoy socializing with family and friends as often as possible, and play with pets.
   • Notice the positives in difficult situations. You can always learn something.
8. 8 Be honest with yourself. The ability to accept reality is one of the main manifestations of emotional and mental strength. If you want to overcome an obstacle, you must first examine the situation. If you lie to yourself about what is happening, then you will only exacerbate the problem and increase the pain.
   • If you tend to drift away from reality (for example, watch too much TV to get away from problems), then acknowledge this habit and try to get rid of it.
   • Admit honestly to yourself what is difficult for you.

Method 4 of 4: Dealing with Difficulties

1. 1 Consider your actions. In a difficult situation, think about your decision or further actions as long as necessary. This will help you cope with your emotions, as well as weigh all the options that are necessary in any circumstance.
   • If possible, assess the situation and write down your feelings. Try to see at least one positive aspect of the situation, even the smallest. Small changes in the way you think are huge.
   • Ponder your words for at least 10 seconds. Even if the girl told you that she wants to break up, you probably have enough time to pull yourself together before answering. Subsequently, you will repeatedly rejoice at such prudence.
2. 2 Consider the situation from all sides. Remain calm and consider the situation before making a decision.What exactly happened? What are the outputs? There are always at least two ways to solve every problem.
   • Let's say a friend asked you to take part in an illegal business with him, and you can't choose between loyalty to a friend and the law. Weigh the pros and cons of each option. Would a true friend ask you to break the law? Or maybe the law does not allow justice to be done?
3. 3 Choose and make the right decision. Be guided by considerations of conscience. Studies show that people are more likely to be happy with decisions that are dictated by instinct, rather than analysis of the issue. Sometimes the answer is obvious, and sometimes it is extremely difficult to make a decision. Don't let the problem get out of hand or grow. Make a decision and take action.
   • Seek advice from people you trust. It's okay to ask for the opinions of others when you are in doubt. The main thing is not to allow them to convince you to act not according to your conscience.
   • Think about what a just, kind, and reasonable person you admire would do now. What would he do?
   • Learn to take responsibility for your actions. Make the best decision you can live with.
4. 4 Analyze your experience. After resolving a difficult situation, think about what happened, your actions and the result. Are you proud of your behavior? Would you like to do it differently? Try to learn from each situation. It is with this practice that wisdom comes. Analyze what happened, and do not try to get it out of your head - and next time you will be better prepared for a similar situation.
   • Don't be discouraged if things didn't turn out the way you planned. Remember that not always everything goes smoothly and a person does not always get what he wants. This observation is valid for of eachhow bizarre a person's life would seem.

Tips

• Avoid people who are disrespectful and make you feel weak.
• Meditate to stay focused and calm.
• Try to live in the present, worry less about the past and worry about the future.
• Don't let the little things ruin your happiness, because life does not stand still. Get together and become a strong person.
• Lighten your load. Often, weak and emotional people take on too much mental baggage and do not know how to let go of the situation.
• If the person tries to hurt you or make you cry, don't let them get their way and act like everything is fine. Let your emotions go out when you are alone or around caring people.