Content

• Steps
• Advice

Denial is a natural part of life. Everyone has been rejected at some point, no matter what they're trying to pursue. Part of life is learning how to react to rejection in an effective way and without harming your health. You need to deal with your feelings of rejection, take care of yourself, and move forward with a positive attitude.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Direct deal after being denied

1. 

   Try not to exacerbate the situation. Most people don't respond well to rejection and tend to personalize it right away. This action will lead to negative thoughts. For example "I was not accepted for this job, so I will never get a job". Try to stay away from this pattern of thinking after you've been rejected.
   • Being rejected once, or even repeatedly, cannot fully reflect your worth. If a person or organization rejects you, it doesn't tell you what will happen in the future. You can still be accepted elsewhere.
   • People often see rejection as an opportunity to criticize themselves. For example, "That person doesn't want to date me, I can't date anyone" or, "This publisher doesn't like the book I've written, I'm really a terrible writer." While considering what you could have done better can be healthy and helpful, understand that it can be difficult to see yourself objectively right after the rejection. Remind yourself that many other people have faced rejection as well. Think about your newly married friend who has gone through so many broken relationships before you can find the right person. Many famous writers, like J.K. Rowling, was repeatedly rejected before finding a suitable publisher. You need to see rejection as a sign of progress. Every bad experience will lead you closer to success.

2. 

   
   
   See rejection as an opportunity to grow. Denying all depends on your perception. Your personal response will determine what your experience means. See rejection as an opportunity to learn and thrive rather than a failure. As you calmed down, consider what you could have done differently. Will you prepare well for that job interview? Do you spend enough time on that story before sending it out? While your actions are not necessarily the cause of your rejection, you can still gain more insight through the self-examination process that rejection forces you to take.
   • If all goes well, you won't have the chance to grow and change. Rejection gives yourself the opportunity to reflect on yourself and assess the situation and motivate you to put in more effort. People who don't face a denial will lack personal growth.
   • When you conduct a situation assessment without blaming or judging yourself, you will have the opportunity to examine and find out what factors are present in the situation, even those that are beyond your control. It will give you the opportunity to learn more about the external factors influencing the situation, and be mentally and emotionally prepared to deal with them in the future.
   • For example, if you have to go through two rounds of job interviews and your company chooses someone else, you can admit that the situation has a lot of outside factors beyond your control, and Perhaps the employer feels another candidate is a better fit for the job.
   • While it's always a great idea to hone your skills, it can be easier to deal with rejection if you develop the habit of acknowledging all the external factors you cannot control. Blaming yourself is not a realistic stance. Opening up your vision to accept the full range of influences will help you avoid blaming yourself, as this is not a healthy way to deal with rejection.

3. 

   
   
   Remember that rejection doesn't usually reflect who you are. Most of the time, rejection is not a reflection of who you are. Many qualified, talented and charismatic people have been rejected for reasons unrelated to themselves. Sometimes, others are simply not attracted to you, or they have personal problems that prevent them from starting a relationship with you. Occasionally, the story or poem you have written is not right for the publisher. Or there are too many candidates applying for a job. Chances are you'll be rejected, and this doesn't reflect your talent or your worth. advertisement

Part 2 of 3: Take care of yourself

1. 

   
   
   Be kind to yourself. After your rejection, you need to be kind to yourself. Avoid tormenting yourself. Take time to reaffirm your worth.
   • Remind yourself that it's common to make mistakes. Failure and making mistakes are natural. Actually, it's a normal part of life.
   • List your current achievements. Things like education, work, professional success, and personal success in relationships with friends and family are achievements that you need to be proud of. Maybe you have achieved many great achievements.
   • Try to imagine that someone, like a friend, is experiencing the same rejection as you. What would you say to that friend? Sometimes, looking at the situation in an extensive way will help you to see it with a more objective way.

2. 

   Get used to irrational rejection. Denial is a completely illogical process. Understand that the feelings you experience after rejection are not necessarily based on reality.
   • A denial is not necessarily a response to a reason. A psychological study was conducted in which participants were rejected by strangers. Even when it was told in advance that everything was just staged, participants still felt sad when rejected. In another study, they learned that the person who rejected them was a member of a racist group like the KKK (Ku Klux Klan). Surprisingly, this didn't help alleviate the pain of rejection.
   • The research above has shown that it can be difficult to ignore rejection, even if you realize that the reason you were rejected is insignificant. Understand that you will feel sad for a while and won't be able to advise yourself over that emotion. Try to deal with your sadness by distracting yourself and allowing it to pass.

3. 

   Determine your feelings exactly. If you deeply personalize the rejection, there might be another reason. Emotions drive thoughts. If you're feeling bad about yourself for another reason, you'll be reacting badly to rejection.
   • An underlying psychological disorder, like depression or anxiety, will cause you to think negatively about yourself. Symptoms of the disorder include frequent troubled thoughts, feelings of hopelessness and helplessness, and feelings of constant sadness and anxiety. If you think you may have depression or anxiety, talk to a psychiatrist.
   • Chronic low self-esteem will also manifest itself through an inability to deal with rejection. Maybe you can change a few reasons why you feel so bad about yourself. Seeing a therapist will help you overcome your self-esteem problems and find ways to make yourself feel better in a holistic manner.
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Part 3 of 3: Moving forward

1. 

   Practice being rejected. It sounds weird, but responding well to rejection requires practice. In fact, participating in a contest or applying for a job where you are most likely to be rejected, if not certain, is psychologically helpful. Over time, this method will help you to become less sensual about rejection. Think ahead about how to react to a rejection and then start participating in events and contests that you know will easily be rejected.

2. 

   Find out about your chances of success before doing the task. Preparing for the rejection will help ease the pain it brings. Before going to a specific event, you should learn about your chances of success. For example, research shows that employers only go through about 2% of resumes for a specific position. Recognizing that you probably won't get an interview call will minimize the feeling of rejection.

3. 

   Chasing many things at once. One of the best methods of dealing with rejection is to pursue multiple things at once. You can submit your story to multiple journals, as long as their website does not prohibit re-submission. When this is the case, you can submit multiple stories at the same time. Apply for hundreds of jobs. If you are trying to find a relationship, date a lot of different people. Doing many things at once will help you stop focusing on a particular denial. At the same time, it will also increase your chances of success at the last minute.

4. 

   Spend time with someone who values ​​you. If you get rejected, spending time with someone who cares about you can be helpful. You should meet friends or relatives who encourage you and your pursuits. This will help remind you of your worthiness and that you won't be rejected by everyone as your friends will be more than excited to spend time with you. advertisement

Advice

• You can chat with others about their experience when they were rejected. Knowing that you're not the only one facing it can help.