Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 3: Avoid comparing yourself to others
• Method 2 of 3: Feeling gratitude
• Method 3 of 3: Change your perspective
• Tips

No matter how hard you try to hide it behind a smile, it's not always easy to get over envy. It can lead to devastating jealousy and even depression. So what should you do to curb jealousy before it eats you up? By learning not to compare yourself to others, by being thankful for what you have, and by applying some tricks that change your perspective, you can nip jealousy in the bud.

To step

Method 1 of 3: Avoid comparing yourself to others

1. Consider how harmful jealousy is to you. Has jealousy ever affected your life in a negative way? Perhaps a lifelong friendship is at stake because you cannot be happy for your girlfriend's happiness, causing you to ignore her calls. Maybe you obsessively check your ex's Facebook page to find pictures of him and his new crush. Or maybe you visit a classmate's photography blog full of envy because you wanted you to have only a fraction of his artistic talent. These are all examples of energy wasted on jealousy. Energy that you could have put into something positive. Jealousy can harm you in the following ways:
   • It takes up all your time
   • It controls your thoughts
   • It destroys your relationships
   • It changes your personality
   • It makes you negative
2. Stop judging yourself so harshly. If you are jealous of someone else, it is often because you feel that you yourself are inadequate. You focus on another person's career, partner, possessions or intelligence, all things that you yourself feel are lacking. Don't judge yourself so sharply, then you have less of a tendency to compare your situation with that of someone else.
   • You may be jealous of a friend's amazing career getting promotion after promotion, when you seem to be standing still. Try to be a little more patient with yourself - your time will come if you keep working that hard.
   • Jealousy arises from making a judgment - think so this better than Which, and by making decisions based on what you don't have. Instead of deciding that some qualities are better than others, try to open yourself up more.
3. Decide for yourself what you understand by successful. Do you judge yourself and others based on the superficial idea of ​​what should be successful? Success does not automatically mean that you have a big house, two cars and a high position. Success is all about finding out which life is best for you you, and to live it to the fullest. If you are less concerned with the standard idea of ​​success in society and instead focus on what you want to get out of bed for each day, you will be less likely to compare yourself with others.
   • Realize that it is okay to be in a different stage of life than other people. Just because you haven't yet found your dream job and partner doesn't mean you're worth less than the people you're jealous of. Life is not a series of boxes you have to tick to find happiness. Everyone walks a different path, and one path is no more meaningful than the other.
4. Turn jealousy into motivation. All that time you waste wishing you could be someone else can be spent much better. If you really want something, take steps - no matter how small - to make it happen. There is nothing wrong with a little competition if you want to achieve something in your life. If you turn your jealousy into improving yourself, you will soon stop feeling envy - you are far too busy being proud of what you have achieved.
   • If you're jealous of someone else's appearance, change some things about yourself so that you look your best, and work on learning to appreciate your own beauty.
   • If you're jealous because someone has something you want, like a car, then save up so you can eventually buy one yourself.
   • If you are jealous of what someone has accomplished, do your best so that you can start reaping the rewards of your efforts.
5. Realize you don't know the whole story. It can seem like someone has it all - the perfect boyfriend, amazingly beautiful hair, great results in school, you name it. But there is always more to it, because no one has a perfect life. If it seems like someone has everything, chances are you have something she want to have. Don't put people on a pedestal and don't think they're just getting all the luck in the world. You never know what their weaknesses are - most people are really good at hiding their imperfections.
   • Hopefully you already find it enough to know that everyone knows their weaknesses. It is not necessary to dig into someone's private life to find those flaws. Put your jealous feelings aside and rather focus on yourself.
6. Remember that the success of others does not affect your success. Let's say someone you know lost 10 pounds by going for a run, and just ran her first marathon. That's quite an achievement, but it doesn't mean you can't do that too! Success in your life does not depend on anyone else's. Whether it is about finding your great love, a good job or something else you want, you can achieve it, no matter how successful someone else is.

Method 2 of 3: Feeling gratitude

1. Focus on your talents and your strengths. Now that you no longer compare yourself with others, you can focus on what you have yourself. Convert your energy into good qualities, so that you get better and better at what you do and who you are. If you focus on perfecting that cello piece or writing a great piece of work, you won't have time to worry about what other people are doing.
   • If you find your mind drifting to things you don't have, make a conscious effort to think about everything you have well have. Do this whenever you experience jealousy. If you refuse to let your mind wander and instead focus on what makes you so special and wonderful, you will have a much more positive outlook.
   • Realize that not everyone has what you have - your talents can even be the source of others' jealousy.
2. Be grateful to the loved ones around you. Picture the people who care about you and who would do anything for you, and think about what you would do for them. Focusing on the people in your life can help you eliminate feelings of jealousy in a positive way. Instead of thinking you are missing out, be grateful for the people who are in your life. Gratitude is like attention. It's about focusing on the present and thinking about all that is good in your life, rather than what is missing from it.
3. Change what you can change and accept what you cannot change. It is important to know what you can change and what is beyond your control. Put your energy into improving the former and don't waste time on the latter, because there is nothing you can do about it. If you keep worrying about things you can't change, you will become very negative, and maybe even depressed. You only have a limited amount of time to spend, so don't waste it on something that can't be changed.
   • For example, if you wish you had the musical talent of a friend because you want to be a singer-songwriter, do whatever you can to become one. Put your heart and soul into the music, take singing lessons, perform on open stages - give everything you have in you. If you think you have a chance to make it in music, or if you are so passionate that you would like to spend your entire life singing, don't let that stop you.
   • However, there are also things in life that cannot be achieved through hard work or strong desire. For example, if you are in love with your best friend's wife and would most like to marry her, you will have to accept that you cannot fulfill this wish. It is important to learn to accept this before your jealousy becomes too strong a negative force.
4. Spend time with grateful people. If your friends are types who are always comparing jobs, partners, or kids, or complaining about what they don't have and killing people who have, you may have to hang out with other people. If you spend enough time with people who are grateful for what they have, you will feel that way too. Hang out with people who are satisfied and who don't constantly complain. Find friends who are non-judgmental, generous and kind and you will soon feel the same.

Method 3 of 3: Change your perspective

1. Make a list of things you are grateful for. It may sound a bit silly, but if it's been a while since you've been thinking about the good things in your life, grab a pen and paper and write them down. Keep going until you have at least 50 things you are grateful for, big and small. If you're still feeling down after 50 points, think about 50 more. By the time you're done you'll see how many great things you have in your life - and how little jealousy adds to that. Here are some things to put on your list:
   • Your talents
   • Your favorite appearance
   • Your best friends
   • Your pets
   • Your favorite dishes
   • Things that make you laugh
   • Reminders of why you should smile
   • Events in the future that you look forward to
   • Favorite items you own
   • Performance
2. Don't complain for a whole day. If you're someone who is jealous but doesn't tell others that, you don't have to try this trick. But if your jealousy swallows you and makes you much more negative than you'd like, try getting through the day without even complaining. You can't keep this up forever - after all, it's okay to get annoyed every now and then! - but if you pay attention not to complain for a day, you will see how often you are actually inclined to say something negative. If you find yourself remarkably quiet that day, this experience should tell you something.
   • If you try this, make sure all complaints are prohibited that day - including complaints about yourself. You shouldn't put yourself down, compare with others in a negative way, or wish something was different from what it is.
   • You may realize that your complaining also affects the people around you. It's not really fun to be around someone whose glass is always half empty. By changing your attitude you can improve your relationships.
3. Try not to get negative stimuli for a week. "Negative stimuli" are all the things that feed the jealousy in you and make you want something you don't have or can't have. The more obsessive it makes you, the worse it is for your psyche, so try living without it for a week to see if you feel better. Here are some examples of negative stimuli:
   • Advertisement. If you constantly see commercials for clothes you can't afford, you get jealous of people wearing nice clothes. The commercials make your jealousy worse. Maybe you should stop watching TV and read a book instead of fashion magazines.
   • Social media. If the bragglers on Facebook make you jealous, you're not alone. Research shows that jealousy gets worse when you use Facebook. If you tend to check Facebook or other social media all the time, turn it off for a week.
4. Compliment 5 people a day. Try to compliment 5 other people every day so that you're not just complimenting the same people. Give these people a heartfelt compliment on something you appreciate - don't get too comfortable with it by mentioning something superficial. Taking the time to think carefully about what you like about the other person and saying this out loud will help you stay positive. You are less likely to compare yourself to others.
5. Volunteer. As long as you keep worrying about what you don't have, go help people who don't have anything at all. Sometimes we forget how good we are actually. Get back on your feet by volunteering at a homeless shelter, hospital, or food bank, and then think back to the experience you have gained. By helping others you can discover how rich you really are and how much positive things you have to offer the world.

Tips

• Resist the urge to compare yourself to others.
• Realize that you have many good qualities.
• Don't deny that you're jealous, just admit it and find a way to get rid of it.
• Remember that the person you envy also has flaws.