Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 2: End the relationship with a good friend
• Method 2 of 2: Leaving an ordinary friendship
• Tips
• Warnings

When it's time to tell someone you don't want to be friends anymore, how do you go about it? The answer depends in part on whether you are close friends or casual friends. If this is someone you don't know well, you can let the friendship fade or end abruptly. If this is a good friend, you will have to tell them personally.

To step

Method 1 of 2: End the relationship with a good friend

1. Make an appointment to visit each other. Send him / her an SMS or an email for a meeting at a neutral location. If you live in the same city, this is the best way to have a conversation about ending the friendship.
   • If they ask you what you want to talk about, say something vague. For example, you could say, "I want to share with you some recent decisions I've made." If she insists, remind him / her that you'd rather talk to him / her about it in person.
   • If your friend lives out of town, send an email or text message to arrange a time to talk on the phone for a while. Of course a face-to-face meeting is best, but if you live in different parts of the country, that's not an option.
   • Be aware that written words are easily misinterpreted. This is one reason why a direct conversation with the other person, even if it is difficult, is best.
2. Prepare yourself well. You may have been thinking about freeing yourself from this friendship for a while, but when you have the meeting with your friend, you should be clear about why you are leaving the friendship.
   • If you need to tell the other person what they did that contributed to your decision, think about how you can bring this as gently and gently as possible.
   • You may not want to let the other person know why you are quitting, and that's okay. It's okay to be vague or use phrases like, "Things have changed in my life ..."
   • You don't have to feel like you have to justify or defend this decision.
3. Keep in mind that your decision may come as a surprise to your friend. That person may become upset or angry when you share the news. Or he / she may want to try to restore the friendship. You must decide in advance whether you are open to working on the friendship or whether your decision is final.
   • If he / she gets angry, take care of yourself. You don't have to make a scene - it's okay to just walk away.
   • Unless you have decided that you are open to mending the friendship, keep it short. You don't have to take care of them until they feel better. Just tell us what you've decided and it's time for both of you to go your separate ways.
   • Do not participate in a discussion of what is right or wrong.
4. Know that there may be an aftermath. If you've been friends for a long time, chances are you have mutual friends. These friends may be forced to "take sides" between you and your former friend.
   • Avoid the temptation to tell your friends what your former friend did that ended the friendship.
   • You don't have to feel like you have to defend your decision to your friends, as this will only exacerbate the unpleasant situation.
5. Don't talk about what your friend did. Explain that it was just your decision. Close friends may understand your reasons without the need for additional explanation.
   • Mutual friends may also try to restore the friendship. If so, switch the topic of conversation. Remind your friends that you are only trying to move on.
   • Don't try to turn anyone against your former friend. If you lose friends because of your decision, they probably weren't good friends anyway.
6. Get on with your life. Don't dwell on your decision to end your friendship - what is done is done. You made the best decision you could, if you thought about it carefully. Now you don't have to think about it anymore. Reframing the choices you've made, or defending your decision (even if it's just against yourself!) Will only stretch the process.
   • It may feel strange not having your boyfriend in your life anymore, but you will survive.
   • Make sure to spend time with other friends. Try to do new things and go to new places with your other friends.
7. Take care of yourself. Eat healthy, get plenty of rest, and do things you enjoy. Be kind and compassionate to yourself, and remember that ending a friendship can bring grief.
   • Focus on the positive parts of your life - the things about your life as it is now that you enjoy - as this can help keep you from grieving over your lost friendship.
   • If you find yourself having negative thoughts, try thinking about something more positive.

Method 2 of 2: Leaving an ordinary friendship

1. Use the "quenching" method. It may be that gradually seeing the person less often is something that happens naturally or that you may need to take conscious steps to do. This is a great way to let someone know that you don't want to be friends anymore without explaining it further.
   • This method is suitable for superficial friends you don't really know very well.
   • If the person is a new friend, this method is less of leaving a friendship than simply confirming that you never really became friends.
   • It can take a long time to end a friendship this way.
2. Decline invitations from this person. One way you can minimize contact with the person is to decline invitations to do things together. This may require you to occasionally sell a white lie to get away from it.
   • For example, if the person asks if you want to see a movie together sometime during the weekend, you could say something like "that sounds cool, but I'm really busy this weekend so I really can't."
3. Avoid conversations. You may accidentally bump into the person while trying to create a distance between the two of you, so you will need to know how to deal with such situations. Ignoring the other person can be hurtful and feel awkward, so try to politely apologize instead for not being able to stay and talk.
   • For example, you can politely say hello to the person, then say something like, “Sorry, I can't stay to talk. I'm late. Maybe another time!"
   • Try to be as polite and considerate as possible. Even though you don't want to be friends with that person anymore, you never know when you'll meet again, and staying polite will reduce the chance that a future meeting will become awkward.
4. Take a more active approach to ending the friendship. If your attempts to politely and gradually end the friendship don't help, you can also try telling the person that you don't want to be friends anymore. You can just be direct and say something like, "You're a great person, but we're just too different. I wish you all the best, but I think we should stop spending so much time together."
   • Avoid using the "ghosting" strategy. Ghosting occurs when you break all contact with the person. For example, you ignore text messages and emails from the person, stop calling back, and unfriend the person on social media. Ghosting can lead to hurt feelings, anger, and concerns about your well-being, so it's not ideal.

Tips

• Remember, you may only want a temporary break from the friendship. Don't try to say or do anything that makes this break permanent unless you're really sure you never want to be friends with this person again.
• Just be nice to be on the safe side.
• If you don't want to be friends because of an argument, or because they sometimes insult you without realizing it, try to talk it out before you end the friendship.

Warnings

• If you want to write down your thoughts in an email, know that it can be shared with anyone and easily modified.