Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 2: Being held
• Part 2 of 2: Making contact

Are you trying to get the guy you love to want to hold your hand? Or are you trying to find the best way to take the first step of holding the hand of the guy you like? Either way, there are a few simple steps you can follow to get to this crucial and romantic first step.

To step

Part 1 of 2: Being held

1. Make eye contact. If you want your date to start holding your hand, simply start with eye contact, smiling subtly. This lets him know that you are interested in him and makes you open and receptive to physical contact.
   • You can also walk closer to him. The physical proximity, along with the eye contact, indicates that you are interested and respond to his presence.
2. Touch him first. Opening up the possibility of physical contact is important. Let your fingers touch during dinner or when you walk away from the car, for example. When you walk side by side, hold his arm gently or take his arm. These are gentler forms of contact that let your date know that you are okay with touching.
   • You can test hand holding by grabbing your date's hand and guiding him somewhere and releasing it when you've reached your destination. You hold hands like this for a moment, but it is not as nerve-racking as officially holding hands.
3. Give subtle hints. Your date may need some clues that you want him to hold your hand. Give him little hints that you want to hold his hand. Your date may just be nervous, so it's always helpful to encourage them.
   • If you are in a movie theater, place your arm and hand on the armrest, palm facing up in an invitation. You can also drop your hand to its side on the armrest. Your date should notice and understand the hint that you want him to take your hand.
   • Pretend you have cold hands. Tell him your hands are cold or ask him to feel if they are cold. Hopefully, your date will see if he can help warm them up. This is a fun, flirty way to get your date to hold your hand.
   • Ask him to compare the sizes of your hands. Put your hand in the air and when your date raises his hand, gently push your palms together and compare hand size. This brings your date's hand close to yours and is a subtle way to let him know that you want to hold his hand.
4. Be daring. If for some reason your date still doesn't understand that you want to hold hands, take the reins. Gently take his hand and squeeze it gently to let him know that you are satisfied. If you're nervous, it is likely that your date is too. This can help both of you relax.
   • Trust and initiative are attractive qualities, so grabbing your date's hand first is letting him know you're interested and want to get closer.
5. Make holding hands more intimate. Once you're used to holding hands, this time try to take the initiative and use a different, more intimate method of holding his hand. If you've clasped each other's hands, open your fingers and move them until they line up with your date's fingers. Spread your fingers slightly and push each of your fingers into the space between your date's fingers, causing your fingers to interlock.

Part 2 of 2: Making contact

1. Try to gauge his interest. When you're out together, watch for subtle clues that he might be open to holding your hand. If your date has been distant all night, that's a sure sign he's not interested. But if he's walked close to you and feels comfortable, that's a good sign to hold his hand.
   • If your date has found unobtrusive ways to make physical contact, such as playfully pushing or touching your arm, then he is probably open to holding hands.
2. Check your hands. You may be a little nervous, so check your hands to make sure they aren't sweaty or clammy. If they do, gently wipe them or put them in your pockets to dry them off. Your date may also be nervous, but sweaty hands aren't very attractive.
   • Also make sure your hands are clean and not too dry. Super dry hands or hands that smell are even less appetizing than sweaty hands.
3. Wait for the right time and place. Holding hands during a dinner or an activity where you move a lot is not very convenient. You don't want to hold hands for the first time when both of you are in a large group of friends or at a family gathering. You don't necessarily have to be alone, but make sure it's a private place where you both feel comfortable.
   • Take a walk along the beach, go on a hike or take a stroll down the street. You may have people around you, but strangers most likely won't pay attention to the two of you, giving you the privacy you need.
   • A cinema is a great place to hold hands. Since you are sitting next to each other, this is a very conducive situation to hold hands. The darkness adds a bit of privacy and can help if your date is shy.
4. Take his hand. When you've found the right time and place and feel ready, walk close to your date and gently take his hand. Don't forget to take it easy and don't rush. Do it as subtly as possible and don't forget to keep talking or walking to make sure it feels natural and comfortable.
   • Make sure you don't jump forward and startle your date by trying to take his hand. You don't want to give the wrong impression at this early stage in your relationship.
   • You can also try rubbing your hands gently on your date's arm before taking his hand. This will let him know what's to come before you grab his hand and add a nice, more intimate touch to the first time the two of you hold hands.
   • If your date recoils, don't make a point of it. He may not be interested, but he may also just be shy and not quite ready to hold hands. Don't take it personally and try to make him feel comfortable in the situation. You will eventually work it out.
5. Start simple. First, use the simple handle technique. When you take his hand, reach over his hand to the center of your palms and make an X with your hands. Close your hand gently, wrapping your fingers and thumb around your date's hand.
   • For the more intimate moment, you can gently rub the back of his hand with your thumb. This will add a little affection to holding and let him know that you enjoy holding his hand without you having to tell him. If he answers the gesture, you know you're doing it right.
   • Do not hold his hand too tightly. This can be uncomfortable and cause your hands to sweat.