Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 5: Correcting dysfunctional thinking patterns
• Part 2 of 5: Bringing structure to your daily life
• Part 3 of 5: Overcoming loneliness
• Part 4 of 5: Improve your health
• Part 5 of 5: Deciding to enlist outside help
• Warnings

Depression and loneliness are common feelings that, unfortunately, can sometimes become too much for us. However, there are measures you can take to keep these feelings in check. These include correcting dysfunctional thinking patterns, structuring daily life, and paying attention to health. Keep in mind that depression is a very complicated illness, and getting outside help may still be necessary to achieve significant improvement.

To step

Part 1 of 5: Correcting dysfunctional thinking patterns

1. Recognize common dysfunctional thinking habits. Dysfunctional thinking is a way of "framing" in which you always imagine the world in such a way that you always have to cycle against the wind. Examples include:
   • Polarized thinking: Thinking in black and white, not allowing the gray areas in life.
   • Filtering or disparaging the positives: Focusing on the negative and ignoring the positive.
   • Divination: Thinking of knowing what will happen in the future.
   • Mind reading: Thinking that other people think negatively about you, or that you are responsible for their negative feelings.
   • Overgeneralization: Thinking that a bad experience guarantees more bad experiences in the future.
   • Blaming: Blaming yourself for things you are not responsible for.
   • Emotional reasoning: Thinking with your emotions, or letting your emotions influence how you perceive certain events.
   • Mustisms: Thinking in terms of "should", "should" and "should". With this you judge and judge yourself.
   • Magnification and minimization: Thinking that certain issues are bigger than they actually are, or try to ignore the issue.
   • Labeling: Using terms that detract from the whole self-image. Example: Immediately label yourself as a failure or loser if you did not succeed.
2. Find a journal to write in. Journaling can be a helpful way to analyze your own thoughts without outside help. Journaling can help you chart and change the way you think and behave. This use has been proven to help relieve stress as well. Stress can be a byproduct of depression and loneliness.
   • Choose what works best for you. You can write a diary in a diary, on a notepad, on loose sheets of paper, or of course on your computer.
3. Use your journal to keep an eye on your emotions. Our thoughts have a profound influence on how we feel, and how we interpret and perceive our environment, future and ourselves. People who suffer from depression often think they are worthless, unlovable, or unworthy. They often feel as if their environment is overwhelming them, as if they have insurmountable obstacles, and as if their future is hopeless.
   • Many people who suffer from depression feel powerless to adjust their feelings and life course. Our thoughts influence our feelings and behaviors, which is the foundation of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). CBT has been proven to be successful in the treatment of depression. The relapse symptoms of depression were significantly less in those who underwent CBT than in those who received purely drug treatment.
   • A great way to start this process is to chart your emotions and automatic thoughts by recording them in a journal or a daily record. Start by first looking for mood swings, then try to analyze what your thoughts were right before you switched moods.
   • For instance:
     • Event: I received bad feedback on my presentation.
     • Feelings: I was ashamed.
   • Here's another example:
     • Event: I forgot to sign my boss birthday card.
     • Feelings: I was sorry and ashamed.
     • I was sorry and ashamed.
4. Write down your automatic thoughts. Automatic thoughts are the things that come to mind spontaneously. Usually they relate to three kinds of ideas: ideas about yourself, about the world, and about the future. Once you have mapped the emotions you felt about events in which your mood suddenly changed, you can begin to analyze the automatic thoughts that correspond to the event. Then you can evaluate those thoughts and determine how dysfunctional they are, and defy them by looking for evidence for and against that thought.
   • In your journal, set up a table in which you can record certain situations, the corresponding emotions, and the thoughts you had just before those emotions occurred.
   • For instance:
     • Event: I have had bad feedback on my work presentation.
     • Feelings: I was ashamed.
     • Automatic thought: I'm so stupid.
     • Identify the dysfunctional thought: You are labeling yourself.
   • Another example:
     • Event: I forgot to sign my boss birthday card.
     • Feelings: I was sorry and ashamed.
     • Automatic thought: I know my boss hates me now.
     • Identify the Dysfunctional Thought: You are trying to read thoughts.
5. Write out rational thoughts to reframe the automatic thoughts. Fight the automatic labels with more rational thoughts. You can learn to generate more rational thoughts by looking for evidence for and against the automatic thoughts, by comparing this situation with similar situations in the past where the automatic thoughts did not last, and by analyzing the situation based on of debt. Try to shift responsibility for certain feelings and events to other people who may have been involved.
   • For instance:
     • Event: I received bad feedback on my work presentation.
     • Feelings: I was ashamed.
     • Thoughts: I'm so stupid.
     • Rational Thought: My thoughts and behaviors do not define who I am. I am not a label. I'm not stupid. I made a mistake and will do better in the future.
   • Another example:
     • Event: I forgot to sign my boss birthday card.
     • Automatic Thoughts: I know my boss hates me now.
     • Rational thought: I don't know how my boss feels about me now. It was a mistake. I can always congratulate my boss verbally and wish them a happy birthday.

Part 2 of 5: Bringing structure to your daily life

1. Schedule every hour of the day. Help fight depression and loneliness by structuring your daily life with a daily schedule. Using a schedule has a threefold effect on depression by combating hopelessness and lack of motivation, and reducing time to rumble (repeatedly worrying about your feelings and problems for long periods of time).
   • Rumination is the phenomenon where you keep playing certain scenarios or problems in your head over and over again, like a record that crashes. While some people view rumination as a form of problem solving ("I try to look at the problem in as many ways as I can until I come to a solution."), You will remain upset (if the problem has upset you) if that keeps you bothering about it.
   • Try to find an agenda that gives you the space to fill in every hour. Schedule every hour of the day. Make sure to include time for journaling, rest, exercise, relaxation, and personal care. To combat loneliness, schedule time to spend with a social group or a pet.
2. Check your schedule regularly. Take your schedule with you so you can stick to it. It is important to keep up with any activity. You can prepare for this by knowing exactly what to do in a day.
3. Keep track of how you felt with each activity. When you have completed the planned activities, you can record the level of proficiency you experienced when completing the activity. Also write down how much fun you had, if you enjoyed it at all. These dates of ability and enjoyment can help you in the future if you are overwhelmed with thoughts of not being able to carry on or enjoy things.
   • Avoid rating your activities on an all or nothing scale. Rather, choose a scale from one to ten, where one stands for low ability or little fun and the ten stands for maximum ability or maximum pleasure.
4. Train yourself to be self-reliant again. Sometimes self-reliance training is necessary for people with depression. This is the case for people who have become dependent on friends and family to take care of their daily needs. In order to become self-reliant again, you will have to take up the responsibility for self-care again.
   • It is important to start in one place and schedule this daily. For example, you can start by taking back responsibility for showering. You can choose to keep track of how well you master this responsibility. For example, you may be able to get out of bed in the beginning, but you are not yet able to take a shower yourself. It may seem like you haven't mastered showering at all, but you've already mastered it better than before. Use your agenda and the feelings of competence to work yourself back up to good self-care. Once you've mastered showering, you can move on to making your bed. Then move on to cleaning your house and so on and so on.
5. Think of a series of distractions that you can reach for in overwhelming times. It is important to know how and when to use distraction as a helpful method to combat rumination and intense emotions. Think of some distractions that you can reach for when you start ruminating, when you feel overwhelmed, or just lonely.
   • Examples include exercise, drinking coffee with a friend, painting, reading, meditating, praying, or playing with a pet. Record these distraction methods in your journal or calendar. Check them out regularly so you can remind yourself of your distraction plan.

Part 3 of 5: Overcoming loneliness

1. Think about the similarities between you and others. Loneliness often stems from thinking that your own experience is drastically different from that of others. However, we all experience the same emotions, from joy and love to disappointment and anger. Consider how the human experience is universal.
2. Talk about the little ones with the people you meet. If you feel lonely, short conversations with the cashier at the supermarket or the bank employee can help. This will help you experience and feel a connection with other people - the conversation doesn't even have to be that long.
   • You can even feel more connected by greeting your neighbor in the morning when you see him / her. This could even trigger a conversation that will lead to a lifelong friendship.
3. Let yourself be heard. You may feel lonely because you are shy or because you have just entered a new school. One of the best ways to overcome that loneliness is to take the plunge and take a risk. Make yourself heard by starting a conversation with someone who seems interesting to you. Or ask an acquaintance you like to take a walk together. You never know. Maybe this person is just as lonely as you and will be more than happy to accept the invitation.
4. Connect with people who have similar interests to you. You may feel lonely because you have very specific interests. Maybe you really love mountain biking, but you don't know anyone else who does it. Search the internet for cycling clubs near you. If you can't find people in your area who also enjoy mountain biking, then you will undoubtedly be able to find people on the internet who only meet virtually. There is a club on the internet for every interest.
5. Volunteer in the community. When you feel lonely, you tend to focus on your own feelings and how your needs are not being met. If you shift your attention to the needs of others, you can also redirect your emotions. Find a nonprofit organization near you. For example, you can volunteer at an animal shelter.

Part 4 of 5: Improve your health

1. Bring regularity to your sleep schedule. Recent research has shown that your brain undergoes deep cleansing during sleep. Your body uses this time to get rid of toxins and waste products. If you don't get enough sleep, you run the risk of mental stress. That's because the build-up of those substances makes it difficult for your brain to function properly.
   • Make sure you get enough restful and uninterrupted sleep. This way you give your brain the best chance to function properly.
   • Most adults need about eight hours of sleep per night, but there are also plenty of people who need a little more or less. Experiment a bit to see what works best for you.
2. Make sure you are sufficiently exposed to daylight. Sunlight exposure and depression can be closely related. Some people suffer from a condition called Seasonal Depression (winter depression), where the lack of sunlight in winter plunges them into deep depression. For others, staying indoors excessively is the biggest culprit. Whatever the cause, try to make sure you get at least some sunlight every day.
   • You can take your lunch outside even when it is cold.
   • Walk to work or school. Try to walk at least part of the route so that you can fit in more daylight.
   • You can also invest in a solar lamp (daylight lamp) to apply light therapy. In some cases these are reimbursed by insurance.
3. Fit exercise into your life. When you exercise, your brain produces chemicals called endorphins and serotonin. These substances ensure that you do not feel the pain of the load on the muscles, but they also do something else. They ensure that you will feel happy. Several studies suggest a link between the inability to regulate these chemicals and depression. That is why many antidepressants have been developed that aim to control and regulate these chemicals. This means that exercise can actually help you keep depression in check.
   • Swimming and jogging are good ways to exercise at the same time and keep the feelings of depression in check. Both activities are known for their ability to help clear your head because, in addition to focusing on the physical sensation that the activities bring, you also focus on the environment.
   • Try to work up to about 35 minutes of exercise per day or 60 minutes three days a week. Research has shown that these exercise schedules are the most effective in fighting depression.
4. Eat healthy, nutritious foods. What you eat can affect your brain in several ways. Research indicates that certain ingredients in our modern diet, including gluten and sugar, can lead to depression. Try to eat plenty of nutrient-rich fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and proteins to feed the brain. Limit the consumption of processed foods, fried foods and refined sugars.
5. Increase the intake of omega 3 fatty acids. These play an important role in brain health. There is evidence to suggest that a diet high in omega 3 fatty acids can help improve mood. Good sources of omega 3 fatty acids include fish and eggs. You can also opt for fish oil supplements.

Part 5 of 5: Deciding to enlist outside help

1. Determine what "outside help" means to you. It is important to know for yourself what "outside help" means to you. In addition, it is important to know how you can reach that help from outside. These are all personal choices, just as they are with other types of healthcare. However, it is important to realize that not wanting outside help, even from friends and family, can be a symptom of depression, where a person becomes completely isolated because he / she does not want to be a burden to anyone or because he / she feels because his / her depression feels weak.. Other definitions of outside assistance may include:
   • Some people also place the use of psychoactive drugs to combat depression with outside help.
   • Others do go to therapy but otherwise opt for a completely natural route.
   • Still others decide not to seek therapy because otherwise they may feel stigmatized, crazy, or onerous.
   • Some people don't even want outside help from friends and family.
2. Don't try to avoid social support. It's important to realize that your depression doesn't define who you are. It's a disease like any other. Don't let the dysfunctional, automatic thoughts that you are weak or a bother to people keep you from hanging out in the social setting with friends and family. Don't hesitate to seek their support if you need it. Social support is an essential protective factor against depression and loneliness.
   • In fact, research has shown that social support lowers stress and can help you find solutions to problems - especially for people struggling with depression.
   • In addition, social support is the best way to combat loneliness, as it helps you feel connected to other people and to life.
3. Draw up a safety plan. You may want to feel that you have the strength to tackle depression on your own. While this is admirable, remember that your mental health comes first. Your mental health is more important than the ability to fight depression.
   • Identify exactly who you will call when you are struggling, and develop a plan as to the kind of outside help you will turn to when you need acute care for depression. A plan like this is called a safety plan, and it includes the names of friends, family, doctors, and helplines who can help you when you need help.
   • For example, you can type out a list with several important phone numbers: phone numbers of your mother, your best friend, your doctor, a nurse / nurse in the emergency room and / or a hospital.
   • Also add the number of the suicide prevention helpline to the list (113 Online: 0900-0113 in the Netherlands; Center for the Prevention of Suicide: 1813 in Belgium), the telephone number of the local police and the emergency number 112.
4. Tell your contacts about your plan. Explain to them how they can help you if you call them in the future. Give them specific tasks that could help you, even if there is no immediate danger. For example, they could keep you company until you feel like you are no longer a danger to yourself. In other cases, you might ask them to call the doctor for you or take you to the emergency room for an evaluation.
5. Get help immediately if you are suicidal. If you have suicidal thoughts or are no longer able to function in your daily life, choose to enlist outside help. Call the 113Online suicide prevention helpline (0900-0113) when you are in the Netherlands, or the helpline of the Center for the Prevention of Suicide (1813) in Belgium.

Warnings

• Get help immediately if you are suicidal. If you have suicidal thoughts or are no longer able to function in your daily life, choose to enlist outside help. Call the 113Online suicide prevention helpline (0900-0113) if you are in the Netherlands, or the helpline of the Center for the Prevention of Suicide (1813) in Belgium.