Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

There are many ways for you and your significant other to truly get closer without having sex. Closeness often begins with an emotion, so let's start by working together to improve emotional cohesion. Be open to the person and really listen when they speak. If you don't want to have sex because you're not ready or you want the relationship to slow down and become more meaningful, you can actually feel more connected to your partner without having sex.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Building emotional intimacy

1. 

   Be willing to open up and show your emotions. Emotional intimacy means being honest with your thoughts and feelings, even when they're uncomfortable. Be ready to share your needs, hopes, and fears with your ex. While opening up can be intimidating, a good partner is someone who will always support you and try to understand you better.
   • Being open about yourself can help you and your significant other learn from each other and support each other in a new and deeper way.
   • For example, tell your ex about your dream of becoming a baking chef or getting a diploma.

2. 

   
   
   Build trust together. A lack of trust in a relationship can lead to conflict and insecurity, especially if you don't feel like you can be emotionally and physically open to them. Always prioritize honesty in your relationship. You can practice speaking your thoughts correctly and always being honest. Show that you've always been there for the person and realize that they are too. Respect each other's physical, emotional and social limits.
   • For example, if the person values ​​privacy, don't share intimate details of your relationship with someone they know.

3. 

   
   
   Listen attentively when the person speaks. A strong relationship involves two people who not only hear but also "listen" to each other. Let's face each other when we talk. Put the phone down and turn off the TV. Pay attention to what the person says without judgments and offer comments in their favor. You should also feel like your ex is listening. You can build intimacy by knowing that you can give your all without criticism.
   • Practice active listening with your ex and build intimacy knowing that you can trust, listen, and understand each other.

4. 

   
   
   Ask personal questions. Learn about the person's inner life. Questions can help you open up and think about what influences, motivates, and how you relate to each other. Ask questions that encourage intimacy and sharing. Focus on open-ended questions for detailed answers and discussion.
   • Ask questions like: "If I were to be anyone, real or not, who would you be and why?", And "What would you say to yourself when you were young? What would you say to yourself when you were old? "
   • Ask questions about your relationship. For example: "What do you think makes us so compatible?", "How do we communicate better?" and "What do you like to do when we're together?"

5. 

   Ask that person for help. If you have a bad day, there is almost nothing as great as having a trusted person to lean on. You may find it difficult to ask for help or cry in front of your partner, but it's worth it when you feel their support. Furthermore, you may find that they are someone you can trust, even at the most difficult times.
   • For example, say “I had a very bad day. Can we talk about it? ”

Part 2 of 3: Being physically intimate without having sex

1. 

   Make use of every opportunity to cuddle. Cuddling is one of the most important ways in love to connect and get together without having to undress. Whether you're watching a movie or lying in bed, put your arms around your partner to feel each other's warmth.
   • Take the person's hand, wrap your arm around their waist or shoulder, and try to touch them more.
   • Sometimes one of the two has to be the initiator.

2. 

   Hug each other for a long time. A hug can reduce stress and strengthen your bond. Get in the habit of hugging your crush when you meet and say goodbye. For example, you might give them a hug before going to work or school in the morning, and when you see them again (for example, after work or school).
   • Hold the person for a long time by wrapping your arms around them and not letting go.
   • If your ex is not used to hugging you, frankly say that you want to.

3. 

   Breathe together. This can make the two of you genuinely close physically and mentally without having to touch each other. Start by sitting facing and apart. Begin focusing on your breaths and inhale and exhale with your eyes closed. When you feel ready, open your eyes and watch the person's abdomen move up and down with each breath they breathe.
   • Your breath will become that person's breath. Whether the two of you start breathing together or not, you will both begin to become in tune in the rhythm of your breathing.
   • After completing this exercise can be a great time to talk and talk about deep and deep things that normally find it difficult to talk about.

4. 

   Make eye contact. Looking at each other can be a sign of love and connection. You may feel weak or a little scared when you look each other in the eye. Stay connected and step away from shame or fear and focus on your partner.You will find that you can feel safe and secure, even if your ex sees who you really are.
   • Take the time to look deeply into the person's eyes. Sit apart and look into each other's eyes. Start at 30 seconds, then gradually increase the duration as you feel more comfortable.

5. 

   Kissing passionately. If passionate kisses have turned into a soft kiss, bring passion back from a passionate kiss. Kissing can increase feelings of closeness, especially in long-term relationships. Couples that kiss regularly are more satisfied with the relationship.
   • Kiss the person in many ways. Examples include kissing on the lips, cheeks, neck, hands and other areas of the body (which do not lead to sex).

6. 

   Try out intimate touch. You may not want to have sex, but there are things that will feel the same way without having to actually have sex. For example, touching each other, kissing each other's bodies, and licking each other. These actions allow you to get together without having to worry about the consequences of having sex.
   • Discuss how comfortable you are with your ex. If you don't have sex for some reason, set specific limits on being physically close. For example, you can kiss but don't want to undress.

Part 3 of 3: Have fun while making intimacy

1. 

   Let's try something new together. That takes courage and can cause you to see another side of you two. You may find yourself liking things you never expected, or discovering things about your crush that you didn't notice. Adding a new experience will help you feel closer and more connected.
   • For example, try boxing, racing, or dancing.
   • Use information from intimate conversations to come up with activities you both enjoy. Alternatively, you could try doing something special for either of you.

2. 

   Add a bit of excitement to the date. Excitement can make you more attractive, and it will increase feelings of closeness. Try doing something fun and a bit risky. Examples include skiing, rock climbing or rowing.
   • When doing something in an excited mood, couples will feel more bonded.

3. 

   Do something a little scary. Even if you don't want to be scared for too long, it can be fun to do something a bit scary to get you and your partner together. When you know you can rely on your partner to feel secure, you will find them very close to you, and you will also trust that they are there for you.
   • For example, go to a haunted house or go for a walk in the dark together.

4. 

   See old photos together. You can both review old memories and show each other your childhood pictures. Viewing pictures of your childhood and the people important to you is a very intimate act. When you talk about the things that are important to you and the events that made you who you are today, you are exposing yourself to your ex.
   • Take your ex around where you grew up and talk about your memories. Then tell them to do the same to you.
   • Family affairs can be difficult to talk about, but try to answer all their questions.

Advice

• Respect each other's limits. Even your own.
• Praise each other.
• Any intimate act or touch requires the consent and response of your partner. Touching without permission is a violation of the person's limits.

Warning

• Some of the instructions in this article can lead to sex. If you don't want to, say it! Don't be afraid to speak up.