How to Regain Your Opponent's Trust

Author: Peter Berry
Date Of Creation: 17 February 2021
Update Date: 23 June 2024
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How To Gain A Horse’s Trust 😊
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Content

Having a successful relationship is not easy. If you have ever betrayed the trust of your loved one, you can save your relationship by regaining the lost trust. Show your partner that you are wholeheartedly trying to heal your relationship. With time and attention, you will gradually be able to re-establish your partner's trust.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Recognizing Your Own Betrayal

  1. Take responsibility for your own behavior and acknowledge the actions you took. Lying will only continue to undermine your beliefs and put more stress on you. If you are not being honest, you will continue to worry about being found out. Be honest and straightforward to prevent possible future betrayal and delay the process of regaining trust.
    • Being frank will also allow you to explain your behavior in the best possible way. Your partner will probably think about the worst and others will exaggerate, so try to control your story.

  2. Put yourself in the opponent's shoes to avoid developing a defensive state. The person you love can get upset and use negative language. Even if you know your mistake, their reaction will put you on the defensive and blame others. It is important to remember that your spouse is in great pain and that they need to express their feelings. As you begin to feel the urge to protect yourself, imagine how you would feel if the person betrayed your beliefs. This can help you accept that the person's action is more of an expression of pain than an attack on you.
    • The person you love can never abuse you no matter what mistake you made. If your partner becomes physically aggressive, insults you, or threatens you with any action, leave the place immediately and seek help.

  3. Actively listen to your partner. Show interest in the person's thoughts and feelings by reaffirming and responding to what the ex is saying. Repeat what they said. Then, respond by stating the emotion they are expressing.
    • For example, the person might say, "You said you would be present, but you didn't come. You know how important this is to you!" .
    • Repeat their words by explaining "I / I did not go there, even though I promised to come".
    • Respond by acknowledging the feelings of your partner "You / I let you down".

  4. Confirm the feelings of the person you love. It's important to make the other person feel as though they are being heard and understood. Your betrayal will be an act of belittling the other person's happiness. Express your care by describing the effect your behavior has on the person you love. For example, "Your behavior has hurt you and broke your beliefs".
    • Try to avoid using the phrase "I / I know" when talking about the other person's feelings. Although this statement is not meant to be offensive, many people may think that you are showing a "superior" attitude towards them.
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Part 2 of 3: Apology to Your Spouse

  1. Explain your motives for acting like this. What makes you betray your crush? You are responsible for your actions, but understanding the underlying emotions in your behavior can trigger your ex's empathy and help you avoid a similar situation in the future. Describe your own feelings and behaviors. For example, "I feel insecure with our relationship and so you have sought attention from others".
    • Use "I" statements to avoid accidentally making the person feel like you're blaming them.
  2. Plan to behave differently in the future. This is the key to helping your spouse see that you will try not to hurt them in the future. Identify the cause of this behavior and how you can help avoid the situation. For example, if your behavior is influenced by someone, don't be alone with them. This includes making sure you always accompany your loved one or friend to the event that he or she will attend and leave if you find you are alone with the person.
    • Talk to and solve problems with your partner.
  3. Be sincere. Express your sincere repentance and repentance for betraying your partner. Your ex may be more likely to trust you if he or she believes that you will try to avoid future unhappy feelings such as atoning for your behavior.
    • Avoid making promises that you cannot or do not intend to do. Failure to fulfill a promise will easily cause an apology to become dishonest.
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Part 3 of 3: Proving Yourself

  1. Communicate clearly with your partner. Poor communication can contribute to betrayal; one of them is not open and honest with the other party. To make sure that this is fixed, you should identify barriers that prevent you from being able to effectively converse and find ways to overcome them. This will show your ex that you are fully committed not to deceive in the future.
    • If you or your significant other is not comfortable discussing your feelings, write a letter expressing your feelings and send it to each other.
    • If you and your partner don't communicate regularly, set a time each week that is dedicated to your relationship.
    • If you're having trouble figuring out why you and your partner can't communicate effectively, you should consider seeking help from a couple counselor. They can help you identify and solve communication problems.
  2. Ask about the needs of the person you love. Perhaps, you won't know how to regain your opponent's trust. You can consult with your ex about what you can do to rebuild trust in them. This might mean communicating more often, spending more time together, seeing a counselor, being patient, or something else. You can ask your spouse to guide you in your behavior to build trust.
  3. Call and / or text your crush regularly. Keeping in touch with your crush regularly helps show that you are thinking about them. This will ease their anxiety about doing something you enjoy regardless of their feelings. Your spouse will more easily trust you if he or she feels connected to you.
    • A good way to stay in touch without looking like you're falling for love is to text funny pictures or a short description of the funny interactions you two have. for that person.
  4. Make a plan to do activities you both enjoy together, without focusing on betrayal. Once you've apologized and made a plan to behave differently, avoid dipping into the painful event. Turn your attention to the present moment by doing fun activities together. If you spend more time with the person you love, they will be less anxious about what you will be doing while you are apart.
    • Find a hobby that you and the person you love can do together. This will increase the amount of time you spend together and can help strengthen your bond.
  5. Express your gratitude towards your partner. Show your ex how much you respect them and how important the relationship is to you. When your partner feels valued, he or she feels more secure.
    • Keep notes of appreciation in a place where you know your ex will see them.
    • If someone expresses appreciation with a gift, be careful not to let the person you love think that you are trying to bribe them to avoid trouble.
    • Help the person with chores so that he or she knows that you notice and are grateful for the actions they take.
  6. Accept that it may take a while to heal. Be patient with your partner as they learn to trust you again. The process is completely out of your control, and trying to make it happen faster can make your partner feel that you don't respect their feelings.
    • Instead of focusing on things you cannot control (time), focus on things you can control, such as being reliable and consistent.
    • Show your partner that you made lasting changes; don't just try to change for a little while and then get back into your old habits.
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Warning

  • Avoid blaming your partner for acting like this. This will only hurt more of the relationship you already have.