How to be special

Video: What makes you special? | Mariana Atencio | TEDxUniversityofNevada

Content

Steps
Method 1 of 3: How to be a person
Method 2 of 3: How to Stand Out from Others
Method 3 of 3: How to be a memorable person
Tips
Warnings
What do you need

Who you are? What makes you special? For some people, these questions cause stress and anxiety.However, being special does not mean being exceptional or better than others in some skill or knowledge. To be special means to be worthy of respect and to be loved. If you want to stand out from the crowd and be a special person, you should work on your personality and learn to respect yourself. You can also learn to stand out and be a memorable, special person worthy of the admiration of others and your own admiration.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: How to be a person

1 Find yourself. Nobody can teach you to be a special person. To become a special person, you need to find what makes you who you are and start developing those qualities in yourself. Whatever you call your inner being (soul, essence, qi), you should learn to accept yourself, define yourself and work on yourself. It takes effort. What does it mean to you to be yourself? Who you are? And how can you get better? People are looking for answers to these questions all their lives. To understand yourself, try answering the following questions:
- When do you feel the calmest? What makes you feel comfortable?
- Describe your ideal day. What will it consist of?
- What do other people praise about your job and your behavior? What are you good at?
- Think about what the last time you argued with someone and what you disagreed with. How was your point of view different from others?
- How would you change yourself if you could? Why?
2 List your principles. Knowing your values in life will help you become a person and live in harmony with yourself. Think about your values in life and write them down. Then place them in descending order of importance. Consider the following when making your list:
- Happiness... For example, if you felt happy with understanding friends and family, then a healthy relationship is one of your values.
- Pride... For example, if you felt proud when you graduated from university, it may indicate that education is your value in life.
- Contentment with yourself... For example, feeling happy with yourself after a productive day at work may mean that you value work.
3 Look for special qualities in other people. What does it mean to be special? Study the people you think are worthy of emulation, outstanding or special in some way, and try to understand the quality of the person who makes such an impression. It may turn out that you consider special people who know how to stand up for themselves, or who give their best at work, or who know how to maintain composure in the most difficult situations. We all have different ideas, so it's important to understand what you value in your grandfather, close friend, or loved one, and not what seems important to others.
- Try not to follow the example of celebrities and reach out to people you know in real life. In the case of celebrities, it is possible to pay attention to superficial things (suppose you can decide that Brad Pitt is special because he is rich and handsome), without being able to appreciate the true nature of a person. We only see a public image that reflects the superficial prestige of a celebrity, not a real person.
- Think about how the personal qualities of people compare with your values, and ignore the superficial things. Being special means knowing who you are deep inside yourself, and not being guided by the ideas of others.
- Power doesn't make a person special. If someone is more powerful than you, or more successful, or better known and respected, that doesn't mean you should follow the example.
4 Take off your masks. We all wear masks. You wear a professional mask for work, and a dating mask for a date after work. In the circle of friends, you can wear one mask, with your family - another. Once you understand what kind of things make you who you are, these masks will no longer be useful.If you want to be a special person, it is important to understand what is behind the mask.
- To understand what kind of masks you are wearing, think back to when you thought you were pretending or being insincere. What were the circumstances? How did you feel after all?
- Check out your social media feeds. There people usually wear certain masks. They want to show a certain image of themselves, influencing it in the way they need. Most often, this image does not correspond to reality. You don't see a real person.
5 Control your ego. The desire to be special is most often the desire to be recognized by others. We want to be respected, considered successful and happy people who can only be envied. However, being special does not mean being exceptional in everything. The best tennis player, author of the most publications, or the richest lawyer in a law firm does not automatically become special. It's important to stay true to yourself and your values. Satisfy your own needs and don't rely on the approval of others.
- Psychologists often talk about internal and external locus of control. A person with an internal locus of control finds satisfaction in himself, looks for a way to enjoy his work and actions. People with an external locus of control rely on others. Which category do you belong to?
- Don't look for confirmation of your worth in other people. Affirm your own qualities yourself, because in order to feel special, you only need this.
6 Surprise yourself. Special people change all the time and surprise themselves with their ability to grow and develop. If you want to be a special person, be aware that you are on a rut and try to look at the situation in a new way.
- Master new skills, read new books and challenge yourself. You will never be too old, too smart, or too experienced to change your beliefs. You will never be too special a person to be wrong.

Method 2 of 3: How to Stand Out from Others

1 Give 10,000 hours to work. Many people have a certain gift from nature, but this does not make them special. A natural inclination for something will be beneficial, but developing a talent into something truly outstanding takes effort. Promise yourself to work on developing your natural tendencies and skills until you become an expert at something.
- Journalist Malcolm Gladwell writes about the 10,000 hour rule in his book Geniuses and Outsiders. Why is it all for some and nothing for others? ”: People who achieved success and became truly special did a lot to come to such a result. It takes about 10,000 hours of practice to master a skill or craft. Only then will you be able to demonstrate a special result.
- Engage in self-development and work and do not try to become special overnight. The first draft of your first novel isn't going to be brilliant, and that's okay. Keep working. Keep improving.
2 Be a lion or lioness. Special people don't wait for good things to happen to them. They look for what they need and take it. Special people have claws. Think about what will make you feel satisfied and what will make you feel better. Then decide what steps you need to take to get what you want. Continuously move towards your goals, objectives and new stages. Get what you need.
- Don't make excuses for yourself. People who are nothing special like to talk about the past and guess what it would be like if ... Don't let yourself think about it.
3 Drown out your inner censor. Let everything inside you out. Be yourself. Allow yourself not to restrain yourself alone with yourself and around people.If you don't show people a part of yourself, try to be more open and vulnerable. If you usually prefer to remain silent, try to voice your opinion when necessary.
- Don't silently agree with everything. If you disagree, please state your opinion. People respect those who dare to express their thoughts and are not afraid to seek the truth. If you are surrounded by people who need to feed their ego with a crowd of sycophants, they are not special. Refuse to communicate with them.
- Getting rid of internal censorship doesn't mean starting to say whatever comes into your head. This does not mean being intentionally weird, cruel, or rude. It just means that you should stop being silent when you should speak, act or think. If something needs to be said, say it. If you need to think, think.
4 Surround yourself with new people. Everyone likes the company of close friends and relatives, with whom they are always comfortable. However, special people try to confront themselves with new experiences and new beliefs, so they meet a wide variety of people and try to understand them. Be prepared to listen.
- If you are very young, find a job. This will allow you to learn a lot and learn to empathize. Try to work a few hours each week after school to take it seriously.
- Connect with people you disagree with regarding religion, politics, and moral issues. Don't try to convince people that they are wrong. Try to understand them. Be open to other opinions.
5 Find your own style. Give yourself the opportunity to feel confident and special and start taking your appearance seriously. Buy things that fit you well and that you enjoy wearing. Take care of yourself to feel more confident. If that means short hair and cowboy boots, great. If dreadlocks to the waist and sandals are fine too. You don't have to be a Gucci model or hipster athlete to look special. There is no particular style. Wear what looks good on you and makes you feel confident.

Method 3 of 3: How to be a memorable person

1 Be a positive person or put up with your inner grouch. There is no single correct attitude to life, just as there is no special way of being. A special person should not constantly smile like an idiot or maintain a serious and unperturbed expression like a monk. Whatever you lean towards, know that this is all normal. Be yourself. If you love hugging, hug. If not, tell people so. Special and outstanding people are very different in character and temperament.
2 Stop telling people what you think they want to hear. There is nothing you can say to make yourself special in the eyes of others. Agreeing with everything doesn't make you special. You just agree with everything. It can help you achieve certain goals, but do you really want to? Be true to yourself, and you will be able to arrive at a more valuable and important goal. Say what you think. Speak the truth.
3 Get ready to fail. To allow yourself to speak out, to be special and unique, you have to take risks. Don't let the possibility of failure get in the way of your goal. Get ready to fail. Fail immediately and often. Make mistakes to get closer and closer to what you need.
- In Silicon Valley, there is a special convention for failed startups - Fail-Con. It allows people to communicate and discuss failed business ideas. Every failure brings you closer to success. Failure is much better than inaction.
4 Learn to see the special qualities of other people and pay attention to them. While you will need to work hard on yourself to become a special person, it is very important to notice special qualities in others as well. Appreciate the special qualities and uniqueness of the people around you. Don't let your ego get in the way of respecting special people and enjoying the fact that they are. This will make you a special person yourself.
- Respecting others means helping other people feel special. Respect the people around you and treat them the way you treat yourself.

Tips

Try to be a positive person. People are pleased when someone tries to be polite to them. Anything you do specifically for someone is a special sign.
All people are priceless. If you are aware of this, it will be easier for you to be yourself.
Try to smile more often. Smiling shows others that you are comfortable with being yourself.
You don't have to act like an angel, but it's best to try to avoid trouble.
Compliment people.
Don't expect quick results. It takes time to become a special person who is proud of himself.
In the company of others, radiate joy and try to cheer up other people (but don't let them dry their feet on you). People will be nice to you if they are happy with everything.
If you smiled at someone, but the person did not smile back, come up and ask what is wrong. Often times, people hide their problems, and talking can help.
Be a good friend and all your friends will love you.

Warnings

If you offered help, and the person refused it, do not intrude and wait until the person comes to you himself. This will allow you not to waste time and energy in vain. Besides, there are always people who will gladly accept your help.
Think before you say anything. Sometimes it happens that we want to help, but a person wants to do everything himself. Insisting on help can hurt someone's pride and self-confidence, which can hurt your relationship.
Beware of negative people and people who complain about something all the time. They will prevent you from enjoying certain things, and it will make it harder for you to feel like a special person.