Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 2: Comfort your better half or a good friend
• Method 2 of 2: Comfort an acquaintance or colleague
• Tips
• Warnings

Most people cry at some point, but women generally cry more than men. If you're faced with a woman crying, there are steps you can take to make her feel better, whether she's a better half, a friend or a co-worker. Comforting a crying person can strengthen your bond and make both of you feel better.

To step

Method 1 of 2: Comfort your better half or a good friend

1. Assess the situation. There can be an infinite number of reasons why a woman might cry. She may be sad, stressed, overwhelmed with joy, or just sick. Before moving on, try to get a grip on what the situation might be and whether it is appropriate for you to try to comfort her. A few reasons why you may not be the right person to comfort her include:
   • If you are involved in the same situation she is now upset about. If you are upset or confused or hurt by the same situation that made her cry, you may not be the right person to help her. If so, you could find a support group that can help both of you deal with what's going on.
   • When she cries for joy. Scientists aren't quite sure why, but someone overwhelmed with happiness can cry uncontrollably, just as if they were scared or sad. In these cases, it might be better to congratulate your girlfriend or lover, rather than to comfort her!
   • When she cries because you had a fight. Before going out to comfort her, you may want to calm yourself down for a while to keep the argument from flaring up again.
2. Make the decision to comfort her. Unless you have a very good reason not to comfort her, you should definitely try to help the crying woman. Ignoring someone who is crying can be detrimental to her emotional well-being. In addition, she will recover more quickly from her tears if you choose to comfort her. And it will also make your relationship stronger.
3. Be a good listener. This cannot be said enough. Tears are an important form of communication and it is important that you pay attention to what she is trying to say. Use techniques for active listening. For example, you can verbally confirm what the crying person is saying, and try not to interrupt.
   • Be very careful not to bring the conversation back to yourself: this is about her. Make sure it's not about you. Even if she doesn't act the way you would like, it doesn't mean she doesn't deserve comfort or that she deserves to be sad.
   • Don't use words like "If I was in your shoes," "Did you try to ...," or "When that happened to me, I didn't make it much of a problem."
4. Don't trivialize her pain or tell her to stop crying. Tears can often have a good or positive effect, even if they were caused by something painful. Crying can bring both physical and emotional relief to someone who is stressed or sad. By bottling up emotions you can prevent healing from taking place. Even if you don't feel comfortable with it, you should still make her cry as much as she needs to. The crying will likely make her sight better.
   • In general, avoid using negative language, commenting, or using the imperative. Don't use words like, "Don't cry," "Don't be sad," or "That doesn't sound bad at all."
   • People whose crying is caused by a psychological disorder such as severe anxiety or depression may actually feel worse instead of better after a cry. If you suspect she is crying because of a mental illness, you should still provide comfort and support, but you should also suggest seeing a doctor so she can get much-needed treatment.
5. Tormented her grief. Show her that you understand her pain by recognizing that her pain is justified and that you empathize with her. Use expressions like:
   • "I understand how painful this must be for you."
   • "That sounds pretty frustrating, I'm sorry."
   • "I imagine you're upset. This sounds like a very difficult situation."
   • "I hate that this happened to you."
6. Use non-verbal reassuring techniques. A crying person can recognize comfort more easily through non-verbal reassuring cues than through verbal communication. Nodding, using appropriate facial expressions, making eye contact, and leaning forward with interest will show her that you are engaged and care about her.
   • Offering a handkerchief can be seen as a caring gesture, but it can just as easily be interpreted as a signal that you want her to stop crying. Therefore, only offer a handkerchief if the crying person asks for it or looks around for a handkerchief.
7. Assess whether physical contact is appropriate. Some people feel comforted by a touch, but others feel anxious. You could offer her a big hug if you know she responds well to hugs. Hugs can even help reduce stress over time. Holding her hand, brushing her hair, touching her shoulder, a kiss on her forehead are other ways of touching appropriately. Follow your own judgment based on what you know about her preferences and the boundaries of your relationship. Always let it depend on her. If she asks you to, withdraw immediately.
   • You can also tell from her body language if she is open to a comforting touch. Defensive body language like crossed arms and legs, clenched fists, or avoiding eye contact may mean she prefers you to keep a little more distance.
8. Ask her what you can do to help. Let her indicate what she wants in this. It's easy to get caught up in arranging things your way. But she may not want any help at all, or help other than what you think is best. In fact, she may not want any help at all or need something completely different than you think. The last thing you want is to make the situation worse. Resist the urge to resolve when you actually need to help her with her pain and grief.
   • Let her know you're there for her, but don't force it on her. Her idea of ​​help may be to have someone to talk to. Often times, the best way to comfort someone is to listen.
   • Ask open questions to find out if you can help her. For example, you can ask, "Is there anything I can do to help?" or "I'd really like to help you - can you come up with something that can improve your situation?" These can be great ways to start a conversation about how to lend her a hand.
   • Sometimes someone who is upset is too upset to give ideas about how to help her. If so, here are some suggestions you could make for her to comfort her. For example, you can suggest going out for an ice cream together, or maybe she likes to watch a movie together. See if she likes any of these ideas.
9. Help if appropriate. While it shouldn't be your first reaction to troubleshooting, there may be some tangible, specific things you can do to ease her pain. If it is in your power to get her problems away - and if it looks like she wants it too - then you can offer to come to the rescue.
   • For example, if she's crying because she's overworked from work, you can offer to do some extra chores around the house so she has more time to focus on her job. If she is crying because she had a fight with a friend, you could discuss with her how to mend that relationship.
10. Keep an eye on her. For the next few days or weeks after the crying incident, visit her every now and then to see if she is still okay. Do not push too much into her space, but ask her for a cup of coffee, ask how she is, or call her more often. While she may recover quickly, she may need a little longer to get over her grief. Showing that you support her during that time will help her a lot.
11. Take care of yourself. Empathy is important, but it can also cause you to become upset or depressed. Make sure you take care of yourself too, and seek help from others if you need to!

Method 2 of 2: Comfort an acquaintance or colleague

1. Show empathy. People prefer not to cry with strangers, colleagues or acquaintances. They prefer to cry to people they care about. If you're not a close colleague, but she's crying out to you anyway, she's probably very upset and in desperate need of sympathy. In that case, it is even more important to respond with empathy and not irritation, fear, or panic.
2. Make her cry. If she really wants you there, let her cry.Don't try to pressure her to stop crying or pretend she "swallows" it. Crying is healthy and natural, and it can help reduce pain and stress.
   • Remember there is nothing unprofessional about tears at work. Most people cry from time to time, so it is inevitable that it will happen at work.
   • Be reassuring if she's embarrassed, say things like "It's okay to cry," or "There's nothing to be ashamed of when you cry - we're all just human!"
3. Show that you are available to talk to. She may not want to go into too much detail with you because she doesn't know you well. But it can help if you offer a listening ear. Ask questions and show with open body language that you are willing to listen if she wants to. For example, you could say:
   • "I know I am your colleague, but if you want to talk to someone, I gladly volunteer. Do you want to talk?"
   • "When you need to talk about something difficult, my door is always open for you."
   • "Can I help you with anything? I like to offer a listening ear, even when it is not about work."
4. Listen to her actively. If she wants to talk to you about her problems, use active listening techniques to show that you are paying attention to her. Examples include: not making suggestions, not interrupting, just asking questions to confirm that you understand what she is saying, avoiding distractions, and making eye contact.
5. Be empathetic but professional. Act like a human being and show that you are caring, but be careful not to cross boundaries with a colleague. After all, your working relationship will have to continue after this incident.
   • For example, it's not a good idea to offer a hug unless she asks for it. If you want to call her outside of working hours to see if she's okay, you better ask her if she's having any problems with that first.
6. Offer her help with work-related matters. Maybe your coworker is crying from work stress, or maybe there's a personal problem that keeps her from focusing on her job. In either case, you should only help her find professional solutions.
   • For example, she may need to take some time off, or you may be able to help her make a plan to do a difficult professional task.
   • However, only do something if she wants you to do something. You easily get caught up in trying to fix things in the way that seems best to you. However, she may not want your help, or she may need something different from what you think. The last thing you want is to make the situation worse.
   • Try not to overindulge in personal matters. You should not feel like you have to solve a colleague's personal problems. Plus, if you don't know her well, don't assume you know how to solve her problems. Be there for her, comfort her and listen. And focus further on work-related issues.
   • If you don't know how you could help her solve her problems, apologize and tell her honestly that you can't help her solve them. If you know someone who you think can help her, recommend that you talk to them and seek their help.

Tips

• Either way, the most important thing you can give to a crying woman is your listening ear and your empathy. Other gestures are meant to be sweet - cooking dinner for her, treating her to coffee, taking her to the movies - but the greatest gift you can give her is your presence and your attention.
• Remember that crying is not a problem to be solved, but rather is a form of communication that you should pay attention to.
• Crying can make others feel uncomfortable, but try to work through that discomfort to offer love and caring to someone in need.

Warnings

• In general, crying is very healthy, but it can also be a sign of a more serious condition such as phobia, anxiety or depression. If she's crying all the time without feeling relieved, it might be a good idea to talk to a professional.
• Comforting a crying person is also a healthy, positive and caring expression. But it can also take a toll. If you feel upset about comforting someone, make sure you take care of yourself by seeking out others who can help and support you.