Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Break Up Friendships
• Method 2 of 3: Moving
• Method 3 of 3: Death of a Friend

The loss of a friend can be very painful. Perhaps a friendship has broken up, one of you has moved, or your friend has died - whatever the reason, give yourself time to heal. You may never forget this friendship, but over time, you will be able to enjoy life and meeting new people. Stay as positive as possible and don't stop yourself from moving on.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Break Up Friendships

1. 1 Allow yourself to grieve. If you suddenly have a falling out with a friend, or if the friendship just faded away, you should admit the loss. Give yourself time and space to mourn the friendship. Common ways to understand your emotions and grieve are:
   • Write a letter to a former friend, but don't send it. Save or burn the letter instead. The idea is to allow yourself to speak, not for a friend to read it.
   • Talk to someone you trust. Don't discuss the situation with mutual friends or say bad things about your ex. Focus on how you feel about losing your friendship.
   • Meditate to clear your mind and focus on your emotions. The sooner you deal with your feelings, the sooner you can acknowledge them and move on.
2. 2 Take some of the blame, but not all. Consider, perhaps, you contributed to the development of this situation. Even if you weren't a bad friend, there were probably things you could have done differently at some point. However, the other person is also responsible. Don't take the blame for anything that goes wrong, but hold back the urge to blame everything on a friend.
   • For example, if you are offended and tell your friend nasty things because he let you down, you should admit that you did not act as maturely as you should. At the same time, it's fair to say that your friend set you up and that he should take some of the blame on himself.
3. 3 Don't dwell on the past. After you've given yourself time to grieve, start moving on. Try not to think too much about your ex. Instead, focus on the present moment and your current activities.
   • If you find it difficult to focus on the present, try to relax your mind and do your favorite things. For example, listen to music or chat with friends to keep your thoughts from going back in time.
   • Keep in mind that the healing time depends on the level of intimacy and the duration of the friendship. In addition, each person wakes up at their own pace. In such a situation, there is no time frame.
4. 4 Find a new hobby or activity, or go out regularly. Leaving your home and being active can help you distract yourself from thoughts of lost friendships. It also gives you something to look forward to. The main thing is that you enjoy doing it.
   • For example, you might join a book club, go shopping, have dinner with friends, be creative, or play sports.
5. 5 Develop other relationships. Now you can channel the time and effort you spent on old friendships into other relationships. You can allocate it to other friends or new acquaintances. Connect with people at school, at work, or in your area. You may be pleasantly surprised at how much you have in common with them.
   • Don't be annoying or overly demanding of other friends. This can tire people quickly.
   • If you want to connect with a new person, it is often enough to just say hello to start a good conversation.
6. 6 Focus on yourself. Thoughts of revenge can humor your self-esteem, but this will only waste energy that you could direct towards pleasure. If you focus on what you like and what makes you happy, you will have less time to focus on your ex. If you find it difficult to concentrate on the positive, try to distract yourself by spending time with other friends.
   • For example, you can devote time and attention to your studies or hobbies to be more successful in those areas of your life.
   • Physical activity can be helpful when you need to blow off steam.
7. 7 Refrain from talking about your ex. Whether it's the bitter truth or made-up rumors, if you speak badly about this person, you will only make yourself look bad. Other people will find you petty and immature and wonder if it's worth getting close to you while you're acting this way. In addition, if you constantly humiliate an old friend, you will not be able to get rid of the emotional attachment to the lost friendship, which will prevent you from moving on.

Method 2 of 3: Moving

1. 1 Chat with your former friend periodically. If possible, try to meet with him once or twice a year. Stay in touch by phone, calling and texting. You can also use social media to stay as close to each other as possible. This will keep you connected without wasting an inordinate amount of time, energy, and money to keep your friendship afloat.
   • Avoid unreasonable expectations of friendship. Talking once a week or once a month can be a realistic option, while a daily conversation is likely to end quickly.
2. 2 Explore your new world. Whichever of you two moves, your world will still change. This means there will be an opportunity for new research and exciting moments. Visit places you've never been before (this should be easy if you've moved). Try meeting new people in your area and then share some interesting memories with an old friend.
   • Don't do this in an attempt to make your friend jealous. Just stay in touch with him by talking about your current life.
3. 3 Join a club or company of interest. Clubs, groups and other associations will give you the opportunity to meet new people with similar interests. These are great ways to make potential friends and have fun. Check the posters in local stores and coffee shops to find out when and where club meetings are taking place.You can also find information in the newspaper or on the internet.
   • You can even join an online group if you can't find anything interesting in your area or if you just want to start in the virtual world.
4. 4 Find new friends. You don't need to rush to find new friends, but you should be open to such opportunities. Accept an invitation from a new acquaintance, or take the initiative and invite him to do something that you like. Friendships rarely happen at the snap of your fingers, but the first step to building new friendships is key if you want to stay in good spirits.
   • If you ignore the need to befriend someone in your new environment, you will likely end up demanding too much of your long distance friendship and draining your old friend mentally. This can lead to a complete disconnection.

Method 3 of 3: Death of a Friend

1. 1 Take time to mourn your friend. Attend a funeral and / or memorial service in his honor. Write a letter to your departed friend to openly express your feelings. You must realize that it is normal to feel confusion and pain after a friend's death; if you avoid these feelings, they will not subside. Better to acknowledge that you are in pain so you can move on and heal.
2. 2 Celebrate your friend's life. Many people in their memories of friends and family focus on how or when those people died. Remembering them this way can be painful. Better discuss the stories from the person's life. Think about what you did together and what he enjoyed doing the most. You can even set aside a specific day each year (like his birthday) to visit his favorite vacation spot or just spend a moment of silence in his honor.
   • Celebrating a friend is different from mourning for him. It should not be about the pain of loss, but about the joy that he was in your life.
3. 3 Try something new. After you get bogged down, it's time to start dealing with the pain. Do something energetic and exciting to distract yourself and gradually you will begin to bounce back again. If thoughts of your friend begin to surface, try to channel them toward happy memories, not painful feelings.
   • The period of grieving depends on the individual and on their relationship with a friend. There is no time frame here.
   • For example, you can play sports, go out with friends, taste new foods, or travel to new places.
   • Don't be hard on yourself if over time the bitterness of loss rolls over you in waves.
4. 4 Rely on friends and family. Talk to loved ones. You can open up to them and share your feelings, or just talk about other things to unload yourself. If they ask you to go out or spend time with you, accept their invitation and try to have fun for at least a short time.
5. 5 Join a support group. A support group can help you cope with the loss of a friend. You will meet other people who have similar feelings and hear their stories. Even if you don't get any advice or find close friends, you will find that you are not the only person going through this pain. Sometimes it is enough to realize that you are not alone to find the strength to move on.
   • Look for ads in the newspaper, ask around town residents, or find suitable support groups online.
6. 6 Allow yourself to be happy. Find things that will make you smile. Do something nice for someone, raise money for charity, or just do something fun. Understand - your life goes on and your friend would like you to enjoy it. Be prepared for bad days to follow, but try to live the good times as well.
   • If you are suffering from severe depression, if you have thoughts of harming yourself or others, or if you cannot accept the loss of a friend, you may need to seek professional help. Your doctor can teach you how to manage your emotions or can refer you to a mental health professional.
   • If you have thoughts of suicide or self-harm, call the emergency psychological hotline of the Ministry of Emergency Situations at 8 (495) 989-50-50, 8 (499) 216-50-50 or 051 (for residents of Moscow), if you live in Russia. If you live in another country, call your local mental health emergency hotline.