Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Acknowledge and Deal with the Problem
• Part 2 of 3: Express that you have a problem
• Part 3 of 3: Find a solution

Sometimes it is difficult to cope with all the piled up problems, and the last thing you want to do is to meet them face to face. Fortunately, problem solving and overcoming is a well-researched area, and there are many cognitive, emotional, and behavioral steps that can be taken to effectively and urgently address any troublesome issues.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Acknowledge and Deal with the Problem

1. 1 Admit the problem. The temptation to dodge an unpleasant question can be great. However, avoiding the problem will not help solve it. Better acknowledge its existence and ask yourself a few questions about it. For example, what are the implications of this problem? Whom does it affect?
   • If it seems to you that you have no problems, but others say otherwise, try to figure out if this is so.
   • If you find it difficult to admit that you have a problem, you are probably in denial. For example, if you don't want to admit that your close relative is using drugs, chances are you are making excuses for their behavior.
   • Yes, sometimes denial can be beneficial, as it protects mental health, but at the same time it takes us away from an urgent solution to the problem.
   • In fact, avoidance often exacerbates the problem and does not provide long-term relief. This only creates a continuous cycle of stress, as deep down the unpleasant question will continue to torment you.
   • However, sometimes a little escapism (escapism) can be helpful. Take a break if you feel overworked and fatigued! Watch a TV series, read a book, or do any other hobby that you enjoy. You can even just sink into yourself and let your mind wander!
2. 2 Avoid catastrophizing. Catastrophization implies the presence of irrational thoughts, such as exaggerating a problem and disproportionately exaggerating it. For example, you think that because you missed an exam in one subject, you will never get a good job. Catastrophizing can also mean categorical thinking (for example, "Either I will solve this problem, or my life is over").
   • To avoid catastrophizing, mark when you do it. To do this, watch your thoughts and try to test them for rationality.
   • To keep track of your thoughts, remember to analyze them and ask yourself: if another person had such a thought, would I consider it reasonable?
3. 3 Think about the origin of the problem. When did you first notice her? Sometimes an unpleasant aspect escapes our attention for a long time.This can be especially true if your problem is related to other people (for example, your sister may have been using drugs for a long time before you noticed it).
   • If you think you know when the problem started, think about the events that happened during that time. Perhaps it is in them that the root of your troubles lies. For example, if your school performance began to decline after your father left your family, you may have a hard time adjusting to these life changes.
4. 4 Put the situation in perspective. Chances are, your problem is not the end of the world: you can still live on, no matter what. Each problem can either be solved or viewed from a different angle - and see that everything is not so scary.
   • Let's say your problem is that you are constantly late for class. To resolve it, change a few habits or otherwise drive to school.
   • Some things cannot be changed, such as a disability or the death of a loved one, but you can learn to live with it and develop successfully with these inputs. Also, keep in mind that people often think that negative events will affect them longer than they actually do.
   • Saying that this is not the end of the world does not deny the existence or importance of the problem. They just help to learn that all problems can be overcome.
5. 5 Take the challenge. The problem can be viewed from two sides: as a negative thing or as an opportunity to withstand a blow with honor and be at your best. For example, if you fail an exam, you may consider it a serious problem and become depressed. Or, you can accept the challenge that has risen in front of you. A bad grade indicates that you need to work harder or apply new training and organizational strategies to be successful. This problem can be used as an opportunity to learn these skills.
   • Dealing with problems and being able to solve them will make you a more competent person, in addition, you will begin to empathize with other people who are struggling with their difficulties.

Part 2 of 3: Express that you have a problem

1. 1 Write down your problem. Put the situation on paper. When a problem takes a letter form and is in front of your eyes, it will seem more tangible, which is more likely to force you to tackle it.
   • For example, if your problem is not enough money, write that down. You can also indicate its consequences in order to implant it in consciousness and gain motivation to solve it. The consequence of a lack of money can be a life in constant stress and the inability to enjoy the desired things.
   • If the problem is not very personal, post it in a prominent place (for example, on the refrigerator) so that you do not forget to act according to the situation.
2. 2 Talk about the problem. Share any relevant details with someone you trust, such as a friend, family member, teacher, or parent. At the very least, this will help reduce stress. Plus, you might get advice that you haven't thought of before.
   • If you are going to talk to someone who has the same problem, be tactful. Let him know that you just want information in order to find a way out too.
3. 3 Accept your feelings. Feelings can be indicators of how the solution to a problem is progressing. Feelings play a very important role, even negative ones. For example, if you are experiencing intense frustration or anger, instead of brushing off your emotions, acknowledge them and appreciate the cause. By locating the source, you may be able to find a solution to your problem.
   • It's okay to get upset, angry, and anxious, provided that you understand that this state of affairs will not help the cause. You will have to take steps to get out of this situation. However, emotions can help you recognize that you have a problem, as well as suggest the source.
   • Here are some things you can do to get your bearings if you are feeling upset: focus on your breathing, count to 10 (or more if necessary), and gently talk yourself into calm down (tell yourself, "Everything will be okay." - or: "Relax"). Try walking, jogging, or listening to soothing music.
4. 4 See a psychologist. If your problem is related to or affects your mental health or well-being, consider making an appointment with a counselor. He will help you sort out problems and solve them.
   • Try to find a psychologist on the internet. For example, in some cities there are centers for free psychological assistance to the population.

Part 3 of 3: Find a solution

1. 1 Investigate the problem. Many problems are so common that you can find tons of detailed information about them on the Internet. Explore various articles or discussion forums. You will most likely be able to find materials on any topic (behavioral, financial, academic, or other type).
   • Consider talking to people who have been through similar experiences or who are professionals in the field related to your problem.
   • For example, if your problem is academic, discuss it with your teacher or another student who has already passed a difficult exam.
   • By understanding how problems arise, you can better solve them. Shifting your focus to resolving the issue will lessen the intensity of unproductive emotions (such as guilt and anxiety) that hinder your coping skills and abilities.
2. 2 Look for a specialist. If your problem is in an area where a specialist can help, be sure to find one. For example, if you think you are overweight and want to lose a few pounds, you can seek help from a dietitian or fitness trainer.
   • Be sure to contact only a certified or licensed specialist in the field. An education and a license proves that the person has the skills necessary to help you with a specific problem.
   • Some people deliberately impersonate specialists. However, if a person does not have documents confirming his knowledge, it is worth doubting his words.
3. 3 Take a look at other people who have solved this problem. Think about those who find themselves in a similar situation and how they dealt with it. Could the same work for you? For example, if you are struggling with alcohol addiction, visit an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting to learn about strategies that people who quit alcohol have successfully used to keep from breaking down.
   • Ask them how they dealt with the problem and overcame it. You may find that you have been so preoccupied with your problem that the obvious solution has eluded you, which, however, has not escaped other people.
4. 4 Brainstorm solutions. Make a list of possible solutions to your problem. Think about where you can start, who you can turn to for help, and what resources you need. Be sure to come up with a variety of options and don't sweep them aside. Just write down whatever comes to your mind and then judge whether it's a good or bad option.
   • Study the anatomy of the problem. As a rule, the problem does not come alone: ​​it has consequences, and it affects other areas of life. Think about which part of the problem you should tackle first?
   • For example, if your problem is that you never go on vacation, the sub-problems might be that you find it difficult to get out of work and save money to afford travel.
   • Deal with the subproblems separately: try to eat less food at the cafe, while talking with your boss about your burnout and the possibility of taking a week off, and also convince him that you will be more productive in the long run if he allows you to recuperate.
5. 5 Evaluate your solutions. Ask yourself a few questions to help you determine which approach is best to use. Ask yourself:
   • Will this solution really solve my problem ?;
   • How effective is the solution in terms of time and other resources it will require ?;
   • How will I feel if I choose this solution over another ?;
   • What are the costs and benefits of this solution ?;
   • Has this solution worked for other people?
6. 6 Put your plan into action. Once you understand what you want to do and have gathered your resources, apply your chosen solution and face the problem face to face. If the first option doesn't work, try plan B (or come up with one). Most importantly, keep going forward until you can successfully overcome the difficulties.
   • As you work on your plan, reward yourself for small successes so you’re more likely to stay on track during difficult times!
   • Resist the temptation to avoid problems if plans don't work. Remember not to be catastrophic. The fact that this option did not solve the problem does not mean that there is no other way.